The Science of Self

• Stay present. It’s something we hear frequently, but what does it mean? Simply put, we are more often caught in the past or looking forward to the future. When we are caught in the past, we are affected by things and events that we have no control over. When we are looking forward to the future (excessively, of course), we are also affected by that which we have no control over. • Author Eckhart Tolle has great insight into the problem of fixating on the past or future; he once said, “All negativity is caused by an accumulation of psychological time and denial of the present. Unease, anxiety, tension, stress, worry—all forms of fear—are caused by too much future and not enough presence. Guilt, regret, resentment, grievances, sadness, bitterness, and all forms of non-forgiveness are caused by too much past, and not enough presence.”• To let go of the past is to forgive, excuse, and allow for errors. We can learn from the past, and we don’t have to experience things in vain. To stop fixating on the future is to accept uncertainty and a certain amount of randomness. We cannot control very much in our lives, and all we can control is our actions and reactions. • Staying in the present is of course easier said than done, but the practice of meditation is a useful blueprint. It is important to clear your mind and simply lose yourself in a thought, feeling, or sensation. Preoccupation is the worst of sins here, and it can only be defeated with time and practice—and the knowledge that the past does not matter anymore and the future is out of our control.Get the audiobook on Audible Show notes and/or episode transcripts are available at https://bit.ly/self-growth-homePeter Hollins is a bestselling author, human psychology researcher, and a dedicated student of the human condition.Visit https://bit.ly/peterhollins to pick up your FREE human nature cheat sheet: 7 surprising psychology studies that will change the way you think.#EckhartTolle #Eckhart #Guilt #Preoccupation #Suffer #Tolle #TheMindsetOfThePresent #RussellNewton #NewtonMG #PeterHollins #TheScienceofSelf #SufferWell

• No matter how bleak things look, stay calm and take heart: you always have the power to choose your response, and you can often turn a disadvantage into an advantage simply by changing your perspective.• When faced with a challenge or obstacle, try to think outside of the box and imagine a solution beyond your current way of thinking. Understand the rules, like Caesar, and then be brave and audacious enough to rewrite them completely to your advantage.• There is never any reason for despair or giving up – things can and often do change at a moment’s notice. Stay alert and take whatever action you can, reminding yourself that, if there are no opportunities on the table that you like, you can create opportunities. The double rampart idea didn’t exist before the battle of Alesia – what novel solution to your own current problems is just one ingenious idea away?Get the audiobook on Audible at https://adbl.co/3NBG3vWShow notes and/or episode transcripts are available at https://bit.ly/self-growth-homePeter Hollins is a bestselling author, human psychology researcher, and a dedicated student of the human condition. Visit https://bit.ly/peterhollins to pick up your FREE human nature cheat sheet: 7 surprising psychology studies that will change the way you think.#Grit #PeterHollins #TheScienceofSelf #AlexanderTheGreatAndTheLandBridgeToTyreIsland #RussellNewton #NewtonMG #Old-SchoolGrit

• Study findings shared in Wiseman’s book The Luck Factor point to four factors that are responsible for a mindset most prone to luck. While these attitudes and traits don’t literally cause luck in themselves, they do lay the groundwork and make us more able to capitalize on luck when it comes our way.• The first factor is openness to new experiences, which means being aware and perceptive of lucky turns and emerging events in your environment, rather than shut out to novel possibilities. We can increase this factor in ourselves by practicing non-judgment and heightened awareness during meditation. • The second factor is to listen to your gut and follow intuitions rather than getting bogged down in self-doubt, second guessing and analysis paralysis. We can improve this factor by building our self-trust. By spending time alone to figure out your own thoughts rather than become overwhelmed by other people’s, you can develop confidence in your own appraisals. • The third factor is to harbor positive expectations, i.e., believing that good things will come. This will build the grit and resilience needed for luck to find you. This can be developed by creating a gratitude or luck journal, to shift your focus onto the positive and train your brain to expect good things. • The fourth factor is the ability to reframe “bad” luck as good luck. Luckiness is a question of perception, and we can reinterpret seemingly unfortunate events by adopting a growth mindset. This will allow us to see the lesson in mistakes, employ counterfactual thinking and accept the hidden value in any outcome. • With the above factors in place, we can not only notice luck around us more easily, but we can start to create the conditions for its unfolding. Get the audiobook on Audible Show notes and/or episode transcripts are available at https://bit.ly/self-growth-home#AnalysisParalysis #BadLuck #BeingLucky #GoodLuck #LuckFactor #Luckiness #LuckJournal #LuckyMindset #UnfortunateEvents #Wisemans #Wiseman’SFourFactors #RussellNewton #NewtonMG #TheScienceofBeingLucky

• The fourth noble truth encourages us to follow the eight-fold path, i.e. we need to understand suffering but also take concrete action towards our intended life every day. We can use proven and effective tools to help us suffer better, and suffer less.• Firstly, we can learn the power of reframing so that we investigate the “rules” we have for deciding what counts as pain or suffering in the first place. Much suffering disappears when we take our own assumptions and interpretations out of the picture. • Emotions are fleeting and always changing. When we understand this, we don’t cling to one emotion or reject another. It’s useful to learn to accept, embrace and name emotions for what they are, so they can flow.• A third tip is to understand that effort and difficulty don’t always signal pain, and rather than being something to avoid, it can be enriching. Get into the habit of asking whether you are really suffering or whether you are just experiencing the inevitable discomfort of change and growth.• Realize that sometimes, pain and suffering may be a sign that something needs to change. Pain can be a wake-up call if we heed its message honestly. Not all pain has to be stoically endured. Be frank with yourself about the cause of pain in your life, and what its message is.• Finally, understand that even raw, blind pain such as the pain experienced by endurance pro-athletes is not the end of the world. Those who fare best tend to have an attitude of “no option.” They distract themselves when it comes to discomfort and don’t allow themselves to indulge in thoughts of giving up.Get the audiobook on Audible Show notes and/or episode transcripts are available at https://bit.ly/self-growth-homePeter Hollins is a bestselling author, human psychology researcher, and a dedicated student of the human condition.Visit https://bit.ly/peterhollins to pick up your FREE human nature cheat sheet: 7 surprising psychology studies that will change the way you think.#Pain #Suffer #SufferBetter #SufferLess #RussellNewton #NewtonMG #PeterHollins #TheScienceofSelf #SufferWell

• Don’t give up. Failure, loss, and disappointment are not the end of the line. Learn, try again, and do better the next time around. Have the courage to accept what can be improved and, instead of dwelling on the pain of your defeat, get proactive and start doing.• It’s cowardly to blame others for your shortcomings or to get angry at life in general for not being fair. If you’ve been justly beaten, accept it graciously. Don’t be a bad loser. In fact, if you can, try to welcome even painful challenges in life as an opportunity to learn and be better. Like the Romans, we can all build monuments to those who have taught us our most difficult lessons.• Hard work is a wonderful remedy for pain and loss. Resilience is not just about passively accepting your lot – you can empower yourself by taking action, and this will make any hardship 100 times easier to bear.Get the audiobook on Audible at https://adbl.co/3NBG3vWShow notes and/or episode transcripts are available at https://bit.ly/self-growth-homePeter Hollins is a bestselling author, human psychology researcher, and a dedicated student of the human condition. Visit https://bit.ly/peterhollins to pick up your FREE human nature cheat sheet: 7 surprising psychology studies that will change the way you think.#BadLoser #Blame #DifficultLessons #Failure #Grit #Oldschool #PeterHollins #TheScienceofSelf #Resilience #Roman #TheBattleOfZama:TheRoman’SSecretToWinning #RussellNewton #NewtonMG #Old-SchoolGrit

• Coincidence and serendipity are related to good luck. We all would like something beneficial and fortuitous to happen to us for seemingly no good reason. We can’t create positive random chances, but We can foster a “serendipity mindset” that helps us take advantage of the chances that come our way.• Serendipity means different things to different people, but generally, it is the combination of seemingly improbable occurrences plus positive personal feelings about them. We can cultivate a serendipity mindset by recognizing triggers in daily life, drawing connections to other unrelated areas, and finding potential value in that link. • Making use of the unexpected requires that we are optimistic, open-ended, comfortable with ambiguity, extraverted, and good listeners, as well as willing to make mistakes or entertain unexpected outcomes. We need to be proactive and curious about what emerges spontaneously.• The real difference between the status quo and serendipity is in the effort you put in following a chance happening, and the meaning you can assign to events after the fact.• Statistician David Hand claims that although coincidences seem surprising, “extremely improbable events are commonplace.” It is only the limits of our human understanding of probability that makes coincidence seem more astonishing. • Luck is a way of describing our interaction with random external events. Those who are religious or spiritual tend to experience more coincidences and perceive them differently. Similarly, self-referential people – i.e., those who tend to connect external events to themselves – also describe more coincidence experiences. Get the audiobook on Audible Show notes and/or episode transcripts are available at https://bit.ly/self-growth-home#BeingLucky #Coincidence #ImprobableEvents #ImprobableOccurrences #RandomExternalEvents #Serendipity #SerendipityMindset #UnexpectedOutcomes #TwoPhenomenaAssociatedWithLuck—CoincidenceAndSerendipity #RussellNewton #NewtonMG #TheScienceofBeingLucky

• Be true to yourself. Have faith in your own judgment and stick to your firmly held convictions, even if you have to do so alone. This will imbue you with enormous courage and resilience in the face of challenges, because you will believe in yourself.• Be humble. Use your intellect and your reason to the best of your ability, but always be willing to learn more. Don’t boast about your conclusions but allow them to guide your convictions quietly from within. If you’re lost, stay curious and return to the faculties that you’re blessed with – keep asking questions and be brave enough to discover the answers.• Realize that, sadly, you will not always be rewarded for your diligence and persistence. Instead, seek to find meaning and purpose in your work, whatever it is, so that it inspires you even if nobody else recognizes its value. Then, you will have tapped a well of strength that very few will be able to match!Get the audiobook on Audible at https://adbl.co/3NBG3vWShow notes and/or episode transcripts are available at https://bit.ly/self-growth-homePeter Hollins is a bestselling author, human psychology researcher, and a dedicated student of the human condition. Visit https://bit.ly/peterhollins to pick up your FREE human nature cheat sheet: 7 surprising psychology studies that will change the way you think.#Grit #GalileoAndTheBraveryToStandAlone #RussellNewton #NewtonMG #Old-SchoolGrit

• Our luck comes in part from our behaviors and choices, and those in turn come from our mindset and the way we think. • If luck = preparation + opportunity, and we cannot control what opportunities come our way, then it means the only way to improve our luck is to focus on being prepared to strike when a lucky chance does come our way.• An obvious way to bring more luck to your life is to work hard, even if the results are far off or not guaranteed. • Hard work isn’t all that matters, though. The surface area theory of luck explains that our Luck is a result of both doing and telling, i.e., hard work combined with how we talk about our passion. with others. You can construct your own doing/telling graph to determine where you need to put your efforts to increase your luck. • We can also increase luck by using the methods of visualization and positive affirmations. Both have been shown scientifically to improve performance and lead to better outcomes. To work well, visualizations have to be rich and vivid, and affirmations have to be said regularly. Naturally, both work best when paired with concrete action taken towards your goals!• Superstitious behaviors are a human tendency that evolved in the face of uncertainty, as a way to feel in control. There is no magic, but belief in the power of a superstition can be powerful in itself. The best superstitions, however, are those that encourage an internal locus of control and which don’t distort our perception of what is and isn’t under our control. Get the audiobook on Audible Show notes and/or episode transcripts are available at https://bit.ly/self-growth-home#BeingLucky #InternalLocus #Luck #PositiveAffirmations #Superstitious #Luck=Preparation+Opportunity #RussellNewton #NewtonMG #TheScienceofBeingLucky

• Viktor Frankl experienced extreme hardship and suffering and, from this, developed his own theory about how many searches for and creates his own meaning. Frankl’s experiences taught him that suffering pushes human beings to find meaning and purpose in their lives. To survive, in other words, is to find meaning in one’s suffering.• Frankl believed that struggle with suffering is an opportunity to seek and create something deeper and more meaningful, identify values and principles, and even deepen one’s spiritual understanding. • Instead of searching for meaning externally, we have to look at our own unique strengths and calling in life, and hear what life demands from us, rather than making demands of it. This means that we need to take concrete action. • Frankl thought that there were 3 ways to find meaning in life: We can work or create something of value, we can truly encounter another human being, or we can make meaning out of our suffering. • One way to do this is to fine-tune your own unique purpose. Suffering can force us to look closely at what really matters to us most in life, but knowing our values also allows us to suffer better.• Another remedy for suffering, according to Frankl, is to have compassion, and to be guided by love. Frankl sees love as mankind’s highest possibility, and when we choose kindness and empathy, we can take any form of suffering and redeem it. Get the audiobook on Audible Show notes and/or episode transcripts are available at https://bit.ly/self-growth-homePeter Hollins is a bestselling author, human psychology researcher, and a dedicated student of the human condition.Visit https://bit.ly/peterhollins to pick up your FREE human nature cheat sheet: 7 surprising psychology studies that will change the way you think.#Frankl #Suffer #Suffering #ViktorFrankl #Frankl’SApproachToSuffering #RussellNewton #NewtonMG #PeterHollins #TheScienceofSelf #SufferWell

• It’s never too late to start over, no matter how old you are. Colonel Sanders started over in his sixties and still managed to create a business empire that would overtake those he might have considered younger and more talented than him. The past doesn’t define who you are now, and it doesn’t define who you can be in the future.• Success takes time, and it takes consistent, diligent effort – there are no shortcuts for anyone. You don’t have to be superhuman to be resilient and disciplined. All you need to do is refuse to give up. Don’t pay attention to the flashy success stories you read about in the media – true accomplishment doesn’t happen overnight, so be patient.• If you’re facing a setback, loss, or disappointment, consider adjusting your expectations. Sometimes being mentally strong and tough is simply a matter of not expecting the important things in life to be easy the first time around!Get the audiobook on Audible at https://adbl.co/3NBG3vWShow notes and/or episode transcripts are available at https://bit.ly/self-growth-homePeter Hollins is a bestselling author, human psychology researcher, and a dedicated student of the human condition. Visit https://bit.ly/peterhollins to pick up your FREE human nature cheat sheet: 7 surprising psychology studies that will change the way you think.#ColonelSanders #Grit #Sanders #ADeliciousStoryOfRejection #KentuckyFriedChicken #Entreprenur #HarlandSanders #RussellNewton #NewtonMG #Old-SchoolGrit