Language of Love with Dr. Laura Berman

On today’s episode of the “The Language of Love,” Dr. Laura Berman sits down with guest Don Miguel Ruiz, Jr. The world-renowned Toltec spiritual teacher and New York Times best-selling author of books like “The Five Levels of Attachment” recently hosted a shaman retreat which Dr. Berman attended, and on this new episode, they sit down to reconnect and reflect on love, healing, and living wholeheartedly and consciously even during this difficult time.Don Miguel Jr. (son of Don Miguel Ruiz, author of "The Four Agreements) recently wrote a groundbreaking book titled “The Seven Secrets to Healthy Happy Relationships,” and as he explains to Dr. Berman, the foundation of all of these secrets is unconditional love.“The difference between conditional and unconditional love, to me, is that conditional love only sees what it wants to see, and unconditional love is willing us to see life as it is, it is willing us to see the whole,” says Don Miguel.Don Miguel and Dr. Berman then delve into communication and the common issues that arise between couples, such as fights about money, parenting, sex, and other stressors. How can one apply the wisdom of unconditional love to rise above these arguments and instead approach their relationship in a more wholehearted and enlightened way? How can unconditional love be applied to these situations in a real, applicable way that couples can use in their daily lives?Don Miguel shares his wisdom and his tips for couples who are seeking to build a healthier and happier marriage, and how people can ‘defuse their triggers’ and learn to separate these arguments from their love for one another and the security of their relationship as a whole. Listen to his life-changing advice now! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

On today’s episode of “The Language of Love,” Dr. Laura Berman talks about how communication is a muscle that couples have to learn to exercise throughout their relationship. She explains that many of us operate under the assumption that our partners can read our minds and hear our inner monologue, thereby understanding our motivations and our needs as we move throughout the day. But, she warns, our partners often understand our inner lives much less than we actually imagine, which leads to misunderstandings, hurt feelings, and unnecessary arguments.Then, Dr. Berman talks about the difference between the way men and women communicate, and how this can lead to issues between male partners and female partners. Dr. Berman explains that when men communicate, they often have a competitive stance, looking for subtle or not-so-subtle ways to ‘one-up’ each other or be the alpha dog in the room. On the other hand, when women communicate, they generally seek out opportunities for connection rather than competition. Hence, they are not aware of the fact that when they talk to their male partner about a household issue such as forgetting to empty the dishwasher, he is already primed and prepared to be in that defensive stance due to male communication patterns. Hence, even the criticism can feel like an attack on his very character or even his worth, which is why a simple complaint about dishes can blow up into a massive argument.Next, Dr. Berman talks about how communication in the bedroom is positively crucial, especially when it comes to women speaking up about what turns them on and what they need from their partners when it comes to sex.  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

On today’s episode of “The Language of Love,” Dr. Laura Berman talks about sexual shame and why so many people are uncomfortable talking about sex. Why is something so natural and so fundamental to the human species so taboo in our culture? And how can we start to break down those barriers and normalize human sexuality?Next, Dr. Berman talks about how aging can impact our bodies and our sexual response. Although there is no such thing as a ‘sexpiration date,’ and older people can desire and benefit from sexual intimacy even in their golden years, the truth is that as we age, our sexual response can become complicated.Your genitals will change in appearance as you age, but this doesn’t have to be a source of shame or low self-worth. Many women may be tempted by the idea of ‘vaginal rejuvenation,’ especially as they age and notice changes to their labia, but these operations come with lots of potential downsides.Not only are these vaginal rejuvenation surgeries totally unnecessary, but Dr. Berman says they can actually harm the nerve-rich tissue in your labia and actually detract from your sexual pleasure in the future as well as cause physical pain and dryness.The bottom line is that genitals come in all different sizes and shapes, and it’s time we start empowering women to love and cherish their vulvas rather than judge or critique them.“What’s most attractive to men is that sense of confidence and comfort that a woman has in her own body and her sexuality,” Dr. Berman says. “They are not analyzing the length of your labia or how they’re sticking out or not sticking out.”  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

On this episode of "The Language of Love," Dr. Laura Berman talks about the meaning of Quantum Love and how to implement Quantum Love principles in your own life, both inside and outside the bedroom. Scientific discoveries over the past 25-50 years have established that at our core, we are all pure energy. Our bodies have an energetic frequency that is always shifting and changing as a result of our thoughts and feeling states. That energy doesn’t stay within our bodies, but emanates out, impacting everyone around us, most especially our romantic partners. Dr. Berman says that couples are like human tuning forks, constantly matching one another’s frequency. You and your mate are constantly entraining your energy to one another. Most of this happens outside conscious awareness, but not when you are practicing Quantum Love. In this episode, Dr. Berman teaches you how to consciously take charge of your body’s energetic frequency so that your partner matches to you; your wants, your desires, and the love you want to experience. You have everything you need to create the love life you desire right here, right now. After you listen to this episode, go to Dr. Berman's website to find her Guided Quantum Love Meditations that will help you get grounded and open your heart so you can create the love you deeply desire and deserve. Find Quantum Love on Amazon.  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

On today's episode of "The Language of Love," Dr. Laura Berman sits down with Jeffrey Marsh. Marsh is an LGBTQ+ activist and social media personality known for their uplifting videos on TikTok. The genderqueer, genderfluid nonbinary author was dubbed "the internet's most beloved anti-bully," and on this episode, Marsh lives up to their reputation as one of the most inspiring and educational voices in the LGBTQ+ community. Marsh is a visionary who coaches people to learn to love and accept themselves, especially the parts of themselves that might feel wrong or flawed, or unlovable. Dr. Berman sits down with Marsh to discuss everything from gender identity to pronouns to what it really means to live a fully authentic life. Marsh explains how they are able to live so bravely even in a world that can sometimes feel so filled with hate. As Marsh discusses their traumatic experiences with bullying as a child, Dr. Berman digs into the topic of childhood bullying from her perspective as a mom who struggled with watching her own kids being bullied.Dr. Berman asks Marsh how parents can better support their children when they're enduring bullying, as her own efforts to intervene were often not successful. When school can feel like a warzone, it can lead kids to make tragic choices that can have devastating consequences. Marsh explains what they think parents should do to protect their kids and also how to teach kids to stand in their own power even as they're being judged and mocked for their differences.Don't miss this inspiring episode that will educate, uplift, and empower you on your journey to wholehearted living.Website:http://www.jeffreymarsh.com/Social Media:https://www.instagram.com/thejeffreymarshhttps://twitter.com/thejeffreymarshhttps://www.facebook.com/jeffreymarshofficialhttps://jeffreymarsh.tumblr.com/https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCKDBJO1KAhAHroi44gRqyFQhttps://vine.co/jeffreymarsh Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

On today’s episode of “The Language of Love,” Dr. Laura Berman talks about the very real danger that comes from ‘dead bedrooms.’ As she explains, the longer you go without sex, the more difficult it is to reawaken that desire and save that sexual connection. From physical concerns like the decline of sexual response and atrophy in the genital region to the emotional valley that can grow between couples when sex falls by the wayside, Dr. Berman explains why it’s so important to get the flames going in the bedroom, because once that fire is doused, it becomes that much harder to reignite once again.Next, Dr. Berman talks about how older women can grow into their sexual prowess as they age. She explains that while older men can be seen as ‘debonair’ or getting better with age, older women tend to be seen as unattractive or simply not seen at all. She explains why this myth is simply false and why sex can be enjoyable and life-affirming for baby boomers and beyond, and how to deal with common issues like vaginal dryness and body image issues as they arise. She explains how older women can lean into their wisdom and embrace life and sexuality both during and after menopause. “I’m really interested in helping women understand what a powerful, innervating, freeing and exciting time this can be,” she says about life after menopause.If you have a question for Dr. Berman you can send a voice message to her on Speakpipe or send an email to languageoflovepod@gmail.com. She might answer your question on the next podcast!  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

On today’s episode of “The Language of Love,” Dr. Laura Berman talks about demisexuality. This term is used to describe someone who only feels an attraction to someone after they have built an emotional connection with them. In other words, they generally don’t feel attraction to celebrities or attractive people they see walking down the street: First, they need to get to know a person before desire develops.In a similar vein, Dr. Berman discusses arranged marriages and whether it is possible to create a sexual connection with someone you only meet on your wedding day. What happens if the person standing at the altar isn’t physically attracted to you, or vice versa? Is there a way you can build desire and attraction if the feelings aren’t there, or if they have diminished over time? Additionally, how can you build an emotional connection when someone when you feel completely distanced from your partner?Next, Dr. Berman talks to a woman who discusses how the lockdown has changed her dating behavior. How was love changed post-pandemic? Dr. Berman acknowledges how being in quarantine has led to us feeling awkward and a bit uncomfortable with eye contact. Moving out from behind our screens and back into the real world can feel very daunting, and lead to feelings of vulnerability and uncertainty. How can we ease back into social activities and find our groove again, after so many months of being shut up at home with Zoom as our main social contact?  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

On today’s episode of “The Language of Love,” Dr. Laura Berman talks about the experience that catapulted her into a spiritual transformation, and ultimately led her to write her book “Quantum Love.” Dr. Berman discusses how the science of energy and the way energy moves in the body led her to deepen her practice as a sex therapist and focus her practice on ‘sex, body, and soul.’Then, Dr. Berman talks to a woman who wants to know whether long-distance relationships are worth entertaining when the person lives thousands and thousands of miles away. How can you build an energetic connection with someone when they live many time zones away? She also talks with a man who has a history of long-distance relationships who says he struggles with giving himself self-care during his alone time, and finding a way to acknowledge his own worth and sexuality after being solo in the Covid shutdown for so long. Dr. Berman talks with a woman who says she struggles with ‘masculine energy,’ and feeling like she is too aggressive or domineering with her partners. She feels like she takes on a position of power in her relationship in which she’s always deciding where they eat, what they do, and how they connect with each other. Dr. Berman advises she tries a ‘surrender date,’ in which she intentionally hands over power to her partner and he gets to decide everything on date night. He can pick the outfit she wears, the jewelry she puts on, the route they take to dinner, the place they eat and even what she orders! Essentially, she goes ‘cold turkey’ when it comes to giving up her dominant side and lets her partner completely take the reins.  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

On today’s episode of “The Language of Love,” Dr. Laura Berman tackles the concept of a ‘new normal’ and the fundamental invitation the pandemic offered each of us: The opportunity to go inward and begin prioritizing connection over distraction, and quality over quantity when it comes to our relationships.For many of us, the pandemic has put a pause on our sex lives. On today’s episode, Dr. Berman talks to a woman who says she hasn’t had sex for a year… and now has decided she wants to wait to have sex until she meets ‘the one.’ She is hesitant to be intimate with a partner too early because she knows it will create feelings of attachment even if the partner isn’t right for her or if the partner isn’t seeking a relationship. So how can she manage her feelings of desire while patiently waiting for ‘the one,’ and how can she explain to her dates that she isn’t going to be open to hookups or casual sexual connection?Dr. Berman also talks about how masculine and feminine energy can impact our desire in the bedroom and the way we sexually respond to our partners. Many women are multi-taskers who have a difficult time letting go and being wholly present in the bedroom, as they are worried about the dirty dishes in the kitchen sink or the presentation they have to give at the office the next day. Dr. Berman discusses the concept of ‘choreplay’ and how being a more engaged and helpful partner around the house can create space for women to feel more relaxation and desire, leading to more sexual pleasure for both partners!  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

On today's episode of the "Language of Love," Dr. Laura Berman talks to a woman who wants to know how she can prioritize and nurture her relationship, even as she is dealing with the great trauma and terror of knowing that many of her loved ones are across the world living in a very dangerous situation. She wants to know: “How can you maintain physical and emotional intimacy when you are terrified for your family members who are living in a warzone?”Dr. Berman’s advice is applicable for anyone who is grappling with loss and fear during this time of social upheaval. Prioritizing our love lives and maintaining intimacy can feel impossible and even shallow when there is so much pain all around us, but Dr. Berman helps reveal how safeguarding our bond and nurturing our relationship needs can actually serve us and helps us be of service in return.Next up, Dr. Berman talks to a woman who wants to know how to tell when she is ready to date after a breakup. When is it time to put yourself back out there, especially as we slowly nudge our way out of the pandemic? How do you deal with feelings of anxiety and trepidation about dating again after heartache?Then, Dr. Berman talks to a woman who asks what you should do when you and your partner have differing viewpoints on the virus. If one of you is pro-mask and pro-vaccine, but the other is afraid of the jab or is ready to stop wearing a mask and social distancing, how can you bridge that divide and ensure that you find a fair compromise that keeps you both feeling safe and respected?  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices