Language of Love with Dr. Laura Berman

Did you know there’s such a thing as Drama Addiction? Today in the Language of Love Conversation, I'm joined by Dr. Scott Lyons, and we're tackling this intriguing topic. From genetics and biochemistry to environmental triggers, we're exploring the roots of this addiction, often linked to trauma and a need to fill emotional voids. Picture drama addicts as thrill-seekers, creating chaos to dodge anxiety and boredom. The catch? This addiction doesn't just affect individuals; it's a relationship wrecking ball.Dr. Scott and I discuss the unsettling impact of drama addiction on connections and share strategies for breaking free. We're big on self-awareness and somatic experiencing as tools to understand and overcome this addiction. By addressing the root causes head-on, we believe in fostering effective recovery.While these techniques are helpful, it's important to address the core issues and underlying causes of drama addiction. When looking for a clinician or support for drama addiction, I suggest seeking someone who specializes in trauma and addiction. A clinician who is trained in somatic experiencing can be very effective in treating drama addiction.Here is a sneak peek at the episode: Drama addiction and its prevalence in our culture Explanation of drama addiction as unnecessary turmoil and intensification of emotions The connection between drama addiction and trauma, dissociation, and filling a void Characteristics of drama addicts, such as focusing on external stimuli and seeking chaos Dynamics of drama addiction in relationships and the role of co-regulation Discussion on drama addicts as energy vampires and fear of intimacy Importance of recognizing and breaking the addiction cycle of drama and stress Strategies for breaking the addiction cycle, including observing reactions and exploring underlying feelings and needs Techniques for managing drama addiction, such as the "step back" and "taking the silverware back" techniques  Visit Dr. Scott's website to learn more about the cool stuff he does. Take a look at his book "Addicted to Drama: Healing Dependency on Crisis and Chaos in Yourself and Others" by Dr. Scott Lyons. You can also connect with Dr. Scott on LinkedIn. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This week, I’m sitting down for a Language of Love Session with a listener who's dealing with some serious relationship hurdles. Picture this: cultural clashes, power struggles, and a partner who's not exactly a cheerleader for her spiritual journey. Theresa reached out to me for advice on navigating cultural differences and power dynamics with her husband. It turns out that her husband isn't very supportive of her spiritual pursuits and often blames her for their son's misbehavior. Not an easy situation to be in, right? In this episode, we’re discussing: Why sticking to traditional gender roles and gender expectations in a relationship doesn’t always work The importance of staying true to your passions and beliefs even if they differ from your partner's How to deal with a partner's critical behavior with healthy conflict resolution and boundaries  The challenges of navigating new dynamics and expectations after having children How a relationship can impact a child and why it's crucial to provide a healthy relationship model for them Remember, you deserve to be in a relationship where you're supported and respected. Don't be afraid to prioritize your own happiness and growth. You've got this! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Let’s dive into a topic that many couples can relate to: bringing back that spark when sex starts to feel predictable. We all know that at the beginning of a relationship, everything is new and exciting. But as time goes on, it's natural for things to become a bit routine. So, how can we inject some much-needed excitement back into the bedroom? It's all about shifting our mindset and energy during intimate moments. It's about being fully present, letting go of any distractions or worries, and truly immersing ourselves in the experience. When we approach sex with this kind of intention and focus, it can lead to mind-blowing connections and experiences. And with a little effort and creativity, you can reignite that fire and create a passionate and fulfilling sex life with your partner. Listen in for some of my tips that you can try out with your partner!Check out my Seven Days to Better Sex program! It’s a fantastic resource that provides you with practical tools and exercises to help you reconnect on a deeper level, perfect for couples who want to reignite their passion and take their sex life to the next level.  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

The idea of “masculine” and “feminine” goes way beyond gender. We all have masculine and feminine within us, we just lean in one direction or another. The energies of the masculine is more directive, organized and containing. The feminine is more emotional, creative and flowing.  In this Language of Love Conversation, I'm joined by my good friend, transformational coach AnnMarie Chereso. Together, we're exploring the intriguing dynamics of masculine and feminine energies within relationships. AnnMarie, with her expertise in guiding personal transformations, is here to offer valuable insights into how understanding and balancing these energies can significantly influence the quality of our connections with others. AnnMarie's wisdom promises to shed light on the mysteries surrounding these energies, providing a thoughtful perspective on navigating relationships with heightened awareness and deeper connection.We unpack: The transformative power of choosing love over fear and how it can positively impact your relationships How tuning more deeply into your feminine energy as a woman can bring balance and harmony to your love life Why receptivity is crucial in creating fulfilling and meaningful connections How your romantic partnerships can become powerful tools for personal growth and healing Steps you can take to move out of fear, especially in relationships If you're ready to unlock the secrets of masculine and feminine energies and create a love life that's truly fulfilling, check out AnnMarie’s courses on her website! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Welcome back to another Language of Love Session! In this episode, I chat with a caller from Australia, Fatima, who is currently going through a tough divorce and grappling with a challenging relationship with her narcissistic mother. Fatima opens up about her struggles with codependency and anger regulation, which she believes are deeply rooted in her traumatic upbringing. I offer her guidance on setting clear boundaries with toxic individuals, including her mother, to protect her emotional well-being and create a healthier environment. Additionally, I discuss the importance of seeking therapy to address unresolved trauma, gain a deeper understanding of herself, and develop effective strategies for managing codependency and anger. We discuss: How unresolved childhood trauma can affect an individual’s parenting style The importance of self-preservation and creating distance from toxic individuals The “splitting” behavior and manipulation tactics used by borderlines How to use somatic experiencing for trauma recovery Remember, if you're going through a difficult time, it's important to seek help and support. You don't have to face these challenges alone. Reach out to a therapist, counselor, or trusted friend who can provide guidance and a listening ear. You deserve to live a happy and fulfilling life, and with the right support, you can achieve it. I also recommend you check out Codependent No More by Melody Beattie. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In this Language of Love Bite, I'm going there. We are talking about the impact of pornography on our love lives. One of the main concerns I discuss in this episode is the accessibility of porn to young people. With the internet being so readily available, it's easier than ever for children and teens to stumble upon explicit content. It turns out that newer research is demonstrating porn can have a profound long-term effect on the developing brain, impacting one’s ability to get aroused without using it. Another issue we are covering is the addictive nature of porn. It's not uncommon for individuals to become hooked on watching porn, spending hours upon hours consuming it. We also get into the ways porn is being misused as a poor form of sex education, setting couples back who have a skewed perception of what pleasurable sex looks and feels like. This can lead to a distorted view of what constitutes a healthy sexual relationship, as porn often portrays unrealistic scenarios and expectations.I’m also sharing: Why porn is not all bad, and how it can be used in a healthy way  The digital distortion of porn and how it affects how your brain perceives what it sees How porn can negatively affect your dopamine levels The misrepresentation of sexual relationships by porn The pressure on women to engage in activities influenced by porn Why porn is not a substitute for intimacy If you or someone you know is struggling with the impact of porn on their relationship, I encourage you to seek professional help — a therapist who specializes in sex addiction can provide guidance and support in navigating these complex issues. Also, if you’re looking to heighten the intensity and connection in your sex life, don’t forget to check out my Seven Days to Better Sex program!Visit my website to explore my range of books and courses on love, sex, and relationships, and be sure to tune in regularly to the Language of Love podcast for thought-provoking discussions and invaluable advice aimed at helping you love and be loved better. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

The biggest fear for many of us is losing someone we love; of facing unexpected tragedies that change the course of our lives forever. For comedian and author Kelsey Chittick, her worst fear became her reality, and it tested her resilience, shattered her world, and ultimately transformed her.  In today’s Language of Love Conversation, we dive into Kelsey's personal journey of grief and healing after the sudden loss of her husband, NFL veteran Nate Hobgood-Chittick. She opens up about her experiences with loss, anxiety, and even her spiritual exploration during this challenging time. She also shares her unique approach to parenting while dealing with grief, which is truly transformative and inspiring. We also get to chat about her incredible book “Second Half: Surviving Loss and Finding Magic in the Missing.”We break down: The profound impact of losing loved ones and finding strength in the face of grief The physical and emotional toll of grief on an individual The spiritual side of grief that opens us up to connecting with the other side   Finding joy and happiness again after loss  This one is a conversation that will give you deep insights into dealing with loss, personal growth, and finding joy even in the midst of pain.You can connect with Kelsey on Instagram and also visit her website to stay updated with her latest content and projects. And don't forget to check out her book, Second Half: Surviving Loss and Finding Magic in the Missing. It's definitely a must-read!My course, Good Grief: Healing From Loss with Love, is packed with insights and practical tips to help you navigate the journey of grief and loss. And, on December 2nd, I will be holding a live in-person event, Good Grief Day, at Hermosa Beach, CA along with amazing healers and teachers who will shine a light and guide us in our grieving journey. Tickets are limited so make sure you grab yours! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In this Language of Love session, I have a chat with Trina, who has been through some really tough times in her past relationships, facing big losses and struggles. She opens up about the toxic relationships and challenges she's been dealing with as she tries to rebuild her life.I emphasized how important it is for Trina to take the time to be single, rebuild and move deeper into love and accept herself before thinking about jumping into a new relationship. It's like building a strong foundation for a house - if you rush past this phase of post-relationship healing, you just make the same mistakes again and again. I suggest that she goes on a journey of self-discovery and self-love, one that's all about what she wants, not what others expect. After all, loving ourselves and understanding our own worth is the first step toward attracting the love we truly deserve.In this episode, we’re diving into: The concept of vibrational frequency and how embracing our divine feminine power can attract the right kind of partner into our lives The impact of deep-rooted traumas and subconscious fears in our interpersonal relationships The importance of having a support system and holding oneself accountable Why setting boundaries is a vital component in healthy relationships Be sure to explore Calling in the One by my good friend Katherine Woodward Thomas! It's a fantastic resource for anyone looking to prepare themselves for love. Visit my website to explore my range of books and courses on love, sex, and relationships, and be sure to tune in regularly to the Language of Love podcast for thought-provoking discussions and invaluable advice aimed at helping you love and be loved better. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Welcome back to another Language of Love Bite! I'm here to dive into a topic that often gets misunderstood: grief and loss. The truth is that everyone's grief journey is unique. There's no one-size-fits-all timeline for healing. So, if you're going through it, remember to be gentle with yourself and allow yourself the space to feel and heal.Now, let's talk about the importance of emotional support during this time. It's crucial to have a strong support system in place - friends, family, or even a therapist who can provide that safe space for you to express your emotions. And don't forget about somatic experiencing techniques! These can help you release any trapped emotions in your body and promote healing from within.But, most importantly, here's something interesting to consider: what if our relationships continue even after death? Obviously it’s not the same, and we’d do anything to have our loved ones with us. But wd are all made of pure atomic energy, and energy can’t be created or destroyed. It can only change form. We can learn to connect to our loved ones’ energies, even after their beloved bodies are no longer here.  In this bite, I dive into:  The importance of emotional support and professional help in navigating grief Somatic experiencing techniques like breathwork and grief yoga as tools for healing Incorporating mindfulness practices to rewire the brain and prevent trauma from becoming the default mode The idea that relationships don't end when someone dies, and ways to stay connected with loved ones through energy I encourage you to keep an open mind when it comes to these concepts. It's okay to question and explore new ideas. And if you're interested in diving deeper into this topic, I've got just the thing for you! My course, Good Grief: Healing From Loss with Love, is packed with insights and practical tips to help you navigate the journey of grief and loss. And, on December 2nd, I will be holding a live in-person event that will be uplifting and inspiring, Good Grief Day, at Hermosa Beach, CA along with amazing healers and teachers who will shine a light and guide us on our grieving journey. Tickets are limited so make sure you grab yours!Grief is a natural part of life, and it's okay to feel it. Just know that you're not alone. Take care of yourself, and remember to be kind to yourself throughout this process. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In today’s Language of Love Conversation, I have a very special guest with me, AnnaLynne McCord! AnnaLynne is not only a talented, well-known actress, but a passionate advocate for survivors of trauma and a fierce supporter in the fight against sex trafficking. She shares her personal experiences of trauma and how they affected her life (and sexuality), as well as her incredible work in supporting survivors. We also talk about the importance of mental health and self-love. AnnaLynne emphasizes the need to break the cycle of abuse and how crucial it is to address the root causes of mass violence and radicalized religion. One thing that stood out to me was her vision for a movement called Love Storm. It's all about spreading love and healing to those who have been through unimaginable pain.AnnaLynne also gives us some insight into her new film, "Condition of Return". It's a thought-provoking movie that explores the consequences of trauma and the dangers of blind faith. It's a must-watch for anyone interested in understanding the complexities of trauma and its long-lasting effects.I'm so grateful to have this conversation with AnnaLynne. Her passion and dedication to making a difference are truly inspiring. So, grab a cup of tea, sit back, and get ready to be moved by this incredible discussion. Let's dive in!In this episode, AnnaLyne and I explore:  The importance of embracing uniqueness and not being afraid to be different The power that can be found in recognizing and integrating the parts of ourselves that carry shame from the past.   Why true peace starts within ourselves and extends to our surroundings AnnaLynne's involvement in fighting human trafficking and modern-day slavery How to break the cycle of abuse and underreporting of sexual abuse The impact of trauma on sexual preferences You can connect with AnnaLynne on Instagram! Don't forget to explore The Love Storm website for guidance on ending sex slavery. Check out The Map of Consciousness and Power vs. Force by David Hawkins for deep perspectives on consciousness and human behavior. Bessel van der Kolk's The Body Keeps the Score is also an essential read for understanding trauma's impact. Lastly secure your tickets for Good Grief Day: Healing from Loss with Love happening in December at Hermosa Beach, CA for a day of profound healing, guided by me and some incredible healers and teachers! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices