You Are Not A Frog

Dr Ed Pooley and Dr Hussain Gandhi join us to discuss critical management skills they wish they had learned at med school. We also talked about how you can develop these practices now.ResourcesEisenhower Matrix and Ike AppFree to Focus by Michael HyattDr Ed Pooley’s Ten Minute Medicine website, Facebook and FB GroupDr Hussain Gandhi’s LinkedineGPlearning's website, Facebook and YoutubeTHRIVE Planner: https://shapes-toolkit.mykajabi.com/thrive-plannerEpisode Highlights[04:25] About Dr Ed and Dr GandhiDr Ed Pooley is a communications trainer.Dr Hussain Gandhi is a GP partner trainer, PCN clinical director, and owner of eGPlearning.[05:54] What Gandhi Wished He Knew in Med SchoolLearn to say no.Delegate and prioritize.[07:56] Ed’s Top Med Career TipsYour job doesn’t define who you are.Build habits that stick.[10:02] Why It’s Hard to Say NoPeople in healthcare often say yes.Saying yes is easier than 'no'.You end up putting other people's needs first.[16:08] How to Say NoShift your mindset from ‘you won’t’ to ‘you can’t'.When you say no,  discuss why and alternative options.Give yourself time to think.[19:32] Learn How to DelegateUnderstand what you need to do and what others can do.Group less urgent tasks. Do them all at once.Have systems and processes that everyone knows.[24:28] Lacking The Power to DelegateShare with your organization the difficulty to delegate.Take control of what you can.Sit down and break down the task.[28:04] Giving Yourself PermissionThe hierarchy can be limiting.The medical education system makes it challenging to separate school and work. It's crucial to speak up and breach the hierarchy.[37:12] Ed and Gandhi’s Final AdviceArgue with a child. Say no without saying the word 'no'.Use the Eisenhower Matrix. Ask someone else to do the same and compare lists.Ask yourself whether or not what you’re doing contributes to your goals.Enjoyed This PodcastWrite a review and share this with your friends.Sign up here for a FREE workbook: https://www.shapestoolkit.com/podcast-CPD-formsJoin the Shapes Collective Facebook group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/2212687302308522/Learn more about our training here: http://www.shapestoolkit.comRachel’s LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/dr-rachel-morris/ Rachel’s Twitter: https://twitter.com/DrRachelMorrisRachel’s email: rachel@wildmonday.co.ukMentioned in this episode:Escape the Urgency Trap masterclass A 90-minute training for doctors and other busy professionals working in high-stress, high-stakes jobs like healthcare.

We all have our own take on what success looks like. Throughout our careers, we’ve conditioned ourselves to work extra hard to get to where we want to be, but many professionals who have reached high levels of success seem to be unhappy. Is this really what success looks like? There is no one definition for success. We’re all different — from our talents and skills down to the priorities we have and the trajectory of our careers. You have the freedom to define success on your own.In this episode, Dr Claire Kaye joins us to talk about the importance of honesty and clarity in defining our own success. We may think that achieving certain goals will make us happy, but evidence shows us it’s the other way around. It’s only when we’re happy that we can be successful. We also discuss how to overcome common barriers to our happiness and success such as fear, guilt, and uncertainty.If you want to know how to live a happier and more successful life, stay tuned to this episode.Here are three reasons why you should listen to the full episode:Discover how to redefine success on your own terms Find out how you can prioritise your own happiness Learn about the common blocks we have around change, and how you can alter your mindset. ResourcesConnect with Dr Claire Kaye: LinkedIn | Website | Facebook | InstagramWe are now working with GP fellowship programs, trainers, and groups to help people feel happier! Bookings are now open for Autumn 2022 and a few slots are left for Spring 2022. You're Not A Frog Episode 71: Create a Career You’ll Love with Dr Claire KayeYou're Not A Frog Episode 88: How to Ditch the Saviour Complex and Feel More Alive with Rob BellFour Thousand Weeks: Time Management for Mortals by Oliver Burkeman The Happy Secret to Better Work by Shawn AchorThe Happiness Advantage by Shawn AchorGet access to the THRIVE Weekly Planner to design your ideal working week! Episode Highlights[04:39] How Does Dr Claire Define Success? [09:33] Success and Passion [12:12] Why It’s Important to Find Happiness First[16:11] It’s Not About the Goal[23:16] How to Plan Your Success[28:57] How to Stay on Your Plan [32:11] Common Blocks Towards Success[36:27] Change Your Mindset [37:47] Change is Not Failure[44:59] What to Do When You’re Overwhelmed[48:26] Find Clarity [51:59] Dr Claire’s Top Three TipsEnjoy This Podcast?For more updates and episodes, visit the You Are not A Frog website. You can also tune in on Google Podcasts, Apple Podcasts or Spotify.Mentioned in this episode:Escape the Urgency Trap masterclass A 90-minute training for doctors and other busy professionals working in high-stress, high-stakes jobs like healthcare.

In this episode of YANAF, we’re talking about worry and anxiety, particularly rational worry and anxiety. You know the phrases, don’t worry, it’ll probably never happen, or ‘It’s not like anyone’s going to die!’ – well what do we do when bad things may well happen, or people’s lives and livelihoods are genuinely at risk? How do we stop ourselves from becoming overwhelmed with anxiety then?To explore this, we’re joined by Psychiatrist and therapist Dr. Caroline Walker to talk about how to stop ourselves from feeling overwhelmed with worry even in the midst of worrying times. Even though we might not be able to control what’s going on in the world, or even just our families or workplaces right now, one thing we do have more control over is how we deal with ourselves when we start feeling anxious or dwelling on unhelpful thoughts (even if they may be very rational). We can also stay focused on the present where everything is OK now. We talk about how worry can be helpful when it spurs us into action but when it’s overplayed can cause us distress and actually make the bad things MORE likely to happen as we can’t think straight or perform as well when we are in our sympathetic fight flight or freeze zones. We share some simple techniques you can use to reduce your anxiety which you can use anywhere EVEN in difficult times. So listen to this episode if you want to find out:Why do we need to be ‘more gazelle’Which emotions your anxiety may be masking and why this matters ANDHow to get yourself out of the vicious cycle of rumination and worryResourcesPermission to Thrive MembershipYou Are Not A Frog Episode 15: Eff-It Living with John C. ParkinFour Thousand Weeks: Time Management for Mortals by Oliver BurkemanThe Joyful DoctorCaroline Walker’s emailEnjoy This Podcast?If you enjoyed today's episode of You Are Not a Frog Podcast, then hit subscribe now!Post a review and share it! If you enjoyed tuning into this podcast, then do not hesitate to write a review and share this with your friends.For more updates and episodes, visit the You Are not A Frog website. You can also tune in on Google Podcasts, Apple Podcasts or Spotify.Sign up here to receive a link to the episode workbook and CPD form downloads for each podcast. You can use them for reflection and to submit for your appraisal. You can also join the Shapes Collective Facebook group where we chat about hot topics and regularly post interesting articles.Have any questions? Contact Rachel through these platforms:LinkedIn: @Dr-Rachel-Morris Twitter: @DrRachelMorrisEmail: rachel@wildmonday.co.ukFind out more about our training here.Mentioned in this episode:Escape the Urgency Trap masterclass A 90-minute training for doctors and other busy professionals working in high-stress, high-stakes jobs like healthcare.

In this episode, Dr Giles P. Croft joins us to discuss how stress starts with our thoughts and emotions. He talks about how the mind works and its tendency to create narratives and predictions that stress us out. We also delve into the importance of allowing ourselves to calm down and letting go of the things we can’t control.Episode Highlights[05:20] Past YANAF Episodes with Giles[06:46] Where Does Stress Start?[14:00] How People Work the Same Way[18:58] What to Do About Valid Fears and Thoughts[24:35] Our Default State[28:44] How to Calm Down[32:03] Context Changes Our Thoughts [35:31] What Thoughts Do We Ignore or Listen to? [42:13] Stress Less[52:34] Practical Tips from GilesEnjoyed This Podcast?Write a review and share this with your friends.Sign up here for a FREE workbook.Join the Shapes Collective Facebook group.Find out more about our training here:Rachel’s LinkedIn.: https://www.linkedin.com/in/dr-rachel-morris/ Rachel’s Twitter: https://twitter.com/DrRachelMorrisRachel’s email: rachel@wildmonday.co.ukPodcast LinksSign up for our FREE webinar on Learn how to thrive at work, even in a demanding job on January 19, 2022 at 8 PM UK time!YANAF Ep 46: Default to HappyYANAF Ep 55: The One About AlcoholSign up for our FREE Permission to Thrive webinar! THRIVE Weekly PlannerThe Master and His Emissary by Iain McGilchristPsychology Has It Backwards PodcastWhy Zebras Don't Get Ulcers by Robert M. Sapolsky Four Thousand Weeks: Time Management for Mortals by Oliver BurkemanLearn how to stress less with Giles’ free 4-step process!  Connect with Giles: Website | Facebook | LinkedIn | Youtube | TwitterMentioned in this episode:Escape the Urgency Trap masterclass A 90-minute training for doctors and other busy professionals working in high-stress, high-stakes jobs like healthcare.

Holidays and celebrations often come with their own set of obstacles and difficulties. Our idea of a perfect holiday never happens because our own assumptions and unrealistic expectations get in the way and lead to an environment filled with conflict.In this special Christmas episode, Corrina Gordon-Barnes shows us the groundwork for setting a peaceful and successful holiday season while navigating difficult relationships with relatives or colleagues. She guides us through taking off the expectation of a perfect holiday with our family and facing reality in ourselves and others. Corrina talks about the ways you can act within your zone of power to resolve conflict. She also walks us through what we can do during difficult gatherings and how to shift routine actions to create different outcomes.It’s the season for countless gatherings and reunions. Tune in to improve your strained relationships with relatives and co-workers through empathy and letting go of past assumptions.Here are three reasons why you should listen to the full episode:Learn how to make people meet your wants and needs without resorting to manipulation.Discover how to reframe your assumptions and biases about yourself and other people.Find out how to recognise when you’re being difficult and what you can do to resolve the conflict.ResourcesCheck out our Permission to Thrive CPD membership for doctors!Get in touch by sending an email: hello@youarenotafrog.comConnect with Corrina Gordon-Barnes: Website | Instagram | Twitter | LinkedInSolve for Happy: Engineer Your Path to Joy by Mo Gawdat: Amazon | WebsiteCheck out our Permission to Thrive CPD membership for doctorsFind out more about the Shapes Toolkit training, talks, and workshopsJoin the Shapes Collective Facebook group:Rachel’s LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/dr-rachel-morris/Rachel’s Twitter: https://twitter.com/DrRachelMorrisRachel’s email: rachel@wildmonday.co.ukEpisode Highlights[05:42] Corrina’s Background [07:18] Celebrating the Holiday with Difficult Family Members[09:54] Facing Reality Without Lowering Your Expectations[13:57] Dealing with Teenagers and Tablets over Christmas[16:01] How to De-escalate Uncomfortable Conversations [19:31] What to Do When Their Answer Is No[21:21] How to Keep Your Boundaries [23:34] Expecting the Pushback and Having Empathy Without Being Patronising[29:10] Dealing with Difficult Work Relationships[37:54] Confirmation Bias in Relatives and Work Colleagues [39:35] Approach Others by Letting Go of the Past[42:33] What You Need to Do If You’re the Difficult Person[46:37] Live with Your Experience of Yourself and Making Allowances[51:09] Shift the Dance and Change Your Perspective[52:18] Tips to Deal with Difficult Relatives and Colleagues[53:06] Rachel’s TakeawaysMentioned in this episode:Escape the Urgency Trap masterclass A 90-minute training for doctors and other busy professionals working in high-stress, high-stakes jobs like healthcare.

We’ve got a lot to handle in the medical field — irate patients, pressure to succeed, and who knows what else? But sometimes, the problem is the system itself. We can’t allow ourselves to grow comfortable in a toxic environment. Look around and see where you can create a change for the better.In this episode, Dr Abdullah Albeyatti talks about improving your life and career by making changes and taking risks. He also explains why settling for what is familiar could be slowly ruining your life and how you can avoid this situation. Finally, he shares his top three tips to become a changemaker in your field. If you want to start doing things to create a change and take more risks, then this episode is for you! 3 Reasons to Listen to This Episode1. Learn when you need to stay or leave your chosen career2. Discover why taking risks can make you happier 3. Uncover Dr Abdullah’s top three tips to create a change  ResourcesPermission to Thrive CPD membershipConnect with Dr Abdullah - LinkedIn | InstagramMedicalchain and myclinic.comOur Iceberg is Melting by Dr John Kotter and Holger RathgeberDownload the Thrive Week PlannerEpisode Highlights[6:20] How Abdullah Overcomes Challenges[7:42] The Biggest Barriers[9:59] Why People Hate Change[12:16] The Feeling of Failing[16:33] Try and Realise[19:48] Bringing in the Lean-Agile Mindset to Doctors[24:18] On Limitations and Failure [28:25] How Abdullah Maintains His Tenacity [30:34] Knowing What Battles to Pick [33:06] On Where to Start [39:48] Enjoy the Journey [47:36] Pursue What You Love[49:10] Three Tips to Create a ChangeEnjoy This Podcast?In today’s high-stress work environment, you may feel like a frog in boiling water. The pan has heated up so slowly that you didn’t notice the feeling of stress and overwhelm becoming the norm. You may feel that it is impossible to survive AND thrive in your work. Frogs generally have only two options — stay and be boiled alive or jump out of the pan. Fortunately, you are not a frog. You have many more options, choices, and control than you think.Learn to master your destiny and create a change so that you can thrive even in the most difficult of situations. If you enjoyed today's episode of You Are Not a Frog Podcast, then hit subscribe now!Here’s to surviving and thriving inside and outside our work!Mentioned in this episode:Escape the Urgency Trap masterclass A 90-minute training for doctors and other busy professionals working in high-stress, high-stakes jobs like healthcare.

Drs Claire Edwin, Sally Ross, and Taj Hassan join us to discuss how we can manage and deal with our failures more effectively. We explore the idea that rather than doing something wrong, failure is an opportunity to really grow and learn both as individuals, as leaders and as organisations. In any situation, it’s important to remember that we’re all human. It’s okay to be honest with ourselves and each other about our mistakes - after all, vulnerability is not a sign of weakness. If you want to know how to change your mindset around failure, stay tuned to this episode.Episode Highlights[04:49] About our GuestsDr Claire Edwin works at the National Medical Director Clinical Fellows and NHS England in the faculty of medical leadership and management. Dr Taj, a previous president of the Royal College of Emergency Medicine, is currently involved in international work in Pakistan. Dr Sally Ross has extensive experience in military and various leadership training events.[07:20] What are Micro Failures? Micro failures are often small things you miss that you think don’t have a consequence. No one can operate perfectly all the time.[10:16] How Sally Views FailureWhen things go wrong, embrace it as an opportunity to learn. Sally shares that her military training helped her develop the trait of failing fast. [12:40] High Expectations and Failure for Medical ProfessionalsThere are higher expectations and demands for medical professionals. It’s okay to not be perfect all the time. [15:33] How Leaders Should Handle Mistakes Basic errors come in different forms that usually arise in the heat of the moment. Failure to build consensus, communicate, and engage could ripple down to more serious errors.[21:45] Importance of Honesty, Trust, and ConsistencyAs a leader, understanding how mistakes were made in forming a conclusion is important.Being honest about your failures isn’t about talking about them everyday.[24:35] Why We Judge Ourselves Based on Our Failures Being a perfectionist can make our judgements harsher. Due to underfunding, medical practitioners are pushed to explain why their patients need to wait.[29:35] Toxic Trio Leading to FailureFailures are often brought about by lack of prioritisation, perfectionism, and people-pleasing.[31:12] The Danger of People-PleasingSally addressed an issue at her workplace that might have painted her as a ‘bad guy’.[34:17] Cultivating Healthy Work CulturesTaj practises zero tolerance for people being rude to his staff members.Being upfront to impolite patients is his way to avoid any escalation. [37:52] Facilitating Learning from FailureWhen people fail, they should have the chance to express it.ResourcesLearn more about ENLIGHTENme which aims to build a strategy to support an emergency care strategy and leadership development for low resource countriesConnect with Dr Claire: Faculty of Medical Leadership and ManagementConnect with Dr Sally: Spire Healthcare | Wessex Facilitation  Connect with Dr Taj: Faculty of Medical Leadership and Management.Mentioned in this episode:Escape the Urgency Trap masterclass A 90-minute training for doctors and other busy professionals working in high-stress, high-stakes jobs like healthcare.

Sheela Hobden joins us to discuss how we can harness the power of checklists to create a routine! When people fail to reach their goals, they often just stop trying or feel a lot of shame. Be realistic and learn to encourage yourself by taking on a range of targets instead of one. Sheela also recommends creating identity-based goals to ensure that you keep building your new identity even after completing certain milestones. Start small, and eventually, you’ll see these good habits stick! If you want to know how to create helpful habits to change your life, stay tuned to this episode.Episode Highlights[04:31] Why Routine is ImportantOur brain loves routine because of its certainty. The model notes that when our routines change, there will be a threat response. [08:24] Free Your Mind with ChecklistsDon’t underestimate checklists. Your brain can think of a few things all at the same time. [13:54] Build a Habit through Routines The more you practice your routine, the more it becomes a habit. Anchor a new habit on something else you’re already doing. [20:00] Don’t Underestimate Small Changes Create significant changes in your life with small changes every day. Create a range of targets instead of just one goal.[23:14] Is There Such a Thing as Too Much Routine? Remember that the things you choose to do are ingrained in what you want in life. Simple actions can lead to contentment and happiness. [26:46] Time, Generosity, and Purpose When you keep yourself too open to choices, you can become paralysed. Be kind to your future self and plan the best choices for them. [32:34] Create Good Routines at Work Emails and notifications are common distractions at work. Don’t tackle a challenging task when you don’t have the energy for it. [37:42] The How and Why Behind Tasks  Working out the hows of a task helps you identify ways to make it easier. ResourcesConnect with Sheela: Bluegreen Coaching I Facebook I Twitter I Youtube I LinkedIn I EmailYou’re Not a Frog Podcast Episode 45: Rest. The Final Frontier with Sheela Hobden Mood MeterFree to Focus by Michael Hyatt You can also check out Michael Hyatt’s free course here! Checklist Manifesto by Atul Gawande Atomic Habits by James ClearTiny Habits by BJ Fogg PhDMan's Search for Meaning by Viktor Frankl  THRIVE Weekly PlannerMentioned in this episode:Escape the Urgency Trap masterclass A 90-minute training for doctors and other busy professionals working in high-stress, high-stakes jobs like healthcare.

Dr Nik Kendrew unravels why we experience overwhelming guilt when bad things happen to us. He also shares some tips, techniques, and resources to cope with difficult times and circumstances. Apart from this, Nik talks about the significance of scheduling our entire day to do important things. Finally, he discusses why setting boundaries is necessary to maintain our sense of self.If you want to learn how to stop feeling guilty when uncontrollable things happen to you, then stay tuned to this episode! Episode Highlights[6:10] About the Boggle DocsNik hosts the Boggle Docs. He gets to invite guests and talk about popular TV shows or movies portraying medical issues. [9:43] Dr Nik, the 100th Episode’s Guest Nik was invited over for the 100th episode because he was the podcast's first guest. [13:16] Nik’s Heart Problem On his way to work, Nik suddenly had difficulty in breathing and experienced terrible chest pain. A paramedic immediately came to his aid and found he was experiencing Atrial Fibrillation. [16:56] After the Incident Nik just felt awful for letting people down even though they told him to rest. Guilt means feeling sorry for something we did or did not do. [18:31] The Feeling of Guilt Among DoctorsNik felt guilty for things he could control. What you feel during stressful situations is a normal physiological response. [19:41] Give Yourself a Break If you’re not doing what you’re supposed to do, you feel responsible for the people who are left to pick up the pieces. [20:51] Gaslighting in Health Care Service The health care service is already on its knees before the pandemic. When COVID-19 happened, primary care had to change drastically. [23:43] How To Cope With Stress and Pressure When times are tough, it helps to take it one step at a time and keep going. [27:03] Why Stay In the Present Staying in the present teaches that there is calm within you. [29:04] Substitute Stress for Happiness Others say they’ll only be happy if they get to complete their goals. However, there will always be something in our lives that will be unfinished. [29:55] Why Achieving Your Goals Would Not Make You Happy We are preparing ourselves for failure by setting unachievable goals. [34:08] Focus On What’s Important When you block off time to do something, it takes away stress because you know there’s a plan. [39:27] Set Your Boundaries When you are in stressful situations, focus on things you can change. Listen to your body. It will enforce its limits. ResourcesCheck out our Permission to Thrive CPD membership for doctors.Find out more about the Shapes Toolkit training, talks and workshops.Sign up here for more free resources.Join the Shapes Collective FB group.Become a member of the Resilient Team Academy!Are you interested in joining our You Are Not A Frog retreat? Or perhaps you have some questions about failure. Drop us an email at hello@youarenotafrog.com to let us know!Mentioned in this episode:Escape the Urgency Trap masterclass A 90-minute training for doctors and other busy professionals working in high-stress, high-stakes jobs like healthcare.

Dr Sarah Coope joins me to talk about the workload of medical professionals and the benefits of setting boundaries while dealing with criticisms amidst the global pandemic. We discuss the three elements of the Drama Triangle and ways to navigate or avoid them reliably. As we dive deeper into their conversation, we emphasise the art of saying 'No' through acknowledging our limits. If you want to take the first step in recognising your limits, handling criticism better and setting proper boundaries, tune in to this episode.Episode Highlights[04:43] The Overarching Challenges Brought by the PandemicThere was and still is much grief, trauma, guilt, and moral injury for doctors.[06:46] Most Impactful Messages from the Podcast Amidst COVIDDr Caroline Walker shared a fundamental key message: ‘It's okay not to be okay’.[09:55] Criticism and Over-responsibility[13:03] Setting Boundaries around ResponsibilitiesWe need to make peace with our limits. [17:23] Should-ing and Ought-ingWe often take criticism personally because it targets our deepest insecurities.[20:26] Hippocratic Oath ShamingOverdoing your duties circles back to the saviour-rescuer.[22:29] Our Core Self-BeliefsAwareness allows us to introspect about the roots and rationale behind our self-beliefs.[25:29] Being in the Victim ModeWe often try to control too much of what we can’t control.[27:08] On the Dangers of ResilienceResilience training is about learning what you can do for yourself.[28:21] Getting Out of the Victim MentalityWe always have a choice, but every choice has unique consequences.[31:00] On Self-SabotageStay in your zone of power and leave the rest of the things you have no control over.[33:23] Tips on Saying ‘No’Give yourself a pause before deciding to say 'Yes' to something. [37:09] Say ‘No’ to the Task, Not the PersonSet a boundary, but remain connected by saying ‘Yes’ to the person.[38:19] What Leaders Could Have Done DifferentlyTell teams that it’s okay to set boundaries and to look after themselves.[42:38] Having a Sense of Pace and BalanceRecognise that the journey is a marathon, not a sprint.Enjoyed This Podcast?Write a review and share this with your friends.Sign up for a FREE workbook.Join the Shapes Collective Facebook group.Find out more about our training here.Email Rachel or reach her on LinkedIn or Twitter.Check out the Permission to Thrive CPD membership for doctors!Sign up now for the Shapes Toolkit Programs to help you take control of your workload, feel better, and beat burnout. Create your ideal week using the THRIVE Week Planner!Are you interested to join our You Are Not A Frog retreat? Or perhaps you have some questions about failure. Drop us an email at hello@youarenotafrog.com to let us know!Mentioned in this episode:Escape the Urgency Trap masterclass A 90-minute training for doctors and other busy professionals working in high-stress, high-stakes jobs like healthcare.