A Jaded Gay

Grief is frequently associated with the LGBTQ+ experience, from fearing rejection to dealing with hate and living in constant terror of being in danger. While any form of grief is both a universal and personal experience necessary to cope with loss, the complexities of queer grief can lead to isolation, mental health challenges, and the suppression of one's authentic self.In this episode, we’re delving into the intersection of disenfranchised grief and queer grief, its unique impact on LGBTQ+ people, and how undergoing a second adolescence can serve as a transformative path towards healing, self-discovery, and reclaiming authentic identities in the face of loss and societal challenges.Additional Resources:Grief - American Psychological AssociationGrief - Cleveland ClinicWhat is Grief?The Five Stages of GriefHonoring Queer GriefWhy Queer People Need to Talk About Disenfranchised GriefDisenfranchised Grief in Queer Companionship and Chosen FamilyLGBT Identification in U.S. Ticks Up to 7.1%The Grief in Queer HealingThe Second Adolescence of LGBTQ+ AdulthoodGet Your MerchSupport the showGet Your Merch

We’ve all experienced grief, that tender ache that lingers in our hearts following a loss. While the experience of coping with loss is crucial to our emotional well-being, it is also complex since it creates an intricate landscape where sorrow, resilience, and the transformative power of healing coexist.In this episode, we’re exploring the multifaceted nature of grief, its symptoms, and the various stages of grief to help us better understand the coping mechanisms needed to truly honor our loss, embrace healing, and find joy amidst the pain.Additional Resources:Grief - American Psychological AssociationGrief - Cleveland ClinicWhat is Grief?The Five Stages of GriefGet Your MerchSupport the showGet Your Merch

For decades, the phrase “That’s So Gay” has been tossed around carelessly to refer to things that are bad or undesirable. While many consider it a simple playground put down, it is actually a microaggression that perpetuates stereotypes and fosters a culture of exclusion.In this episode, we’re taking a look at the origins of the phrase “That’s So Gay,” its harmful implications, and how we can encourage others to reflect on their language choices to promote a more inclusive and accepting society.Additional Resources:23. Let's Talk About the F WordThe History of the Word "Gay"That's So Gay (Urban Dictionary)Think Before You Speak CampaignWhy is it OK to Say "That's So Gay?""That's So Gay" is Just So WrongThe 2021 National School Climate Survey (Executive Summary)The 2021 National School Climate Survey (Full Report)HRC Foundation’s Welcoming SchoolsWhat Do You Say to “That’s So Gay” and Other Anti-LGBTQ Comments?What Do You Say to ‘That’s So Gay’ & Other Anti-LGBTQ+ Comments? (Resources)Get Your MerchSupport the showGet Your Merch

In the early stages of dating, it’s normal to feel butterflies and maybe even experience infatuation. But the intoxicating allure of infatuation can grip our hearts and minds, which may result in overwhelming emotions and blurring the line between reality and fantasy.In this episode, we’re unraveling the distinction between infatuation and love by examining the characteristics and pitfalls of infatuation that set it apart from genuine, lasting affection.Additional Resources:42. Are You Emotionally Unavailable?Infatuation (Merriam-Webster)Infatuation (Cambridge Dictionary)Infatuation Versus Love: How Different Are They?6 Causes of InfatuationInfatuation vs. Love: How To Tell If You're Just InfatuatedWhat is the Real Difference Between Love and Infatuation?What's the Difference Between Love and Infatuation?How to Overcome an InfatuationEmotionally Unavailable: What It Means, Signs, & What to Do About ItGet Your MerchSupport the showGet Your Merch

Recently, conservatives have used the unrestricted exercise of religious freedom and freedom of speech to promote discriminatory beliefs and harmful ideologies that perpetuate prejudice and undermine the rights and dignity of LGBTQ+ people. On Friday, June 30, 2023, the Supreme Court of the United States ruled that the First Amendment entitles some business owners to refuse same-sex wedding work, which is a staggering blow to LGBTQ+ equality.In this episode, we’re discussing the Supreme Court’s recent decision regarding 303 Creative LLC v. Elenis and the possible ramifications this conservative ruling may have on the ongoing fight for LGBTQ+ equality.Additional Resources:303 Creative LLC v. Elenis303 Creative LLC v. Elenis (American Bar Association)Alliance Defending FreedomMasterpiece Cakeshop v. Colorado Civil Rights Commission46. Obergefell v. Hodges and the Ongoing Fight for Marriage EqualitySupreme Court Says 1st Amendment Entitles Web Designer to Refuse Same-Sex Wedding WorkSamuel Alito 'Joked' About Black Kids Wearing KKK Robes During Oral ArgumentsDo Most Americans Oppose Supreme Court LGBTQ Ruling? It Depends on the Poll.Gallup LGBTQ+ Rights PollFreedom of Speech and LGBT Rights: Americans’ Views of Issues in Supreme Court CaseData for Progress PollLegitimacy of ‘Customer’ in Supreme Court Gay Rights Case Raises Ethical and Legal FlagsThe Mysterious Case of the Fake Gay Marriage Website, the Real Straight Man, and the Supreme CourtThe Man Named in the Supreme Court’s Gay Rights Ruling Says He Didn’t Request a Wedding WebsiteThe 19th Explains: Why the Respect for Marriage Act Doesn’t Codify Same-Sex Marriage RightsCongress: Pass the Equality ActSupport the showGet Your Merch

While most gay dating apps aim to connect LGBTQ+ people with their community, it can still be challenging to make genuine connections which can lead to feelings of loneliness and rejection. The reality is most gay dating apps are outdated with limited features, lacking inclusivity, and they haven’t adapted to evolving user needs and preferences–until now.In this episode, Michael Kaye, Director of Brand Marketing & Communications at Archer, joins us to discuss a new, innovative dating app, which offers a unique and inclusive space for queer men to connect, explore their identities, and build meaningful relationships.Additional Resources:Sign up for Archer!Archer (Instagram)Archer (TikTok)Michael Kaye (Instagram)Get Your MerchSupport the showGet Your Merch

Just fifty miles east of Manhattan, Fire Island has been considered a gay village since the 1950s, with the stretch of land between Fire Island Pines and Cherry Grove—known as the Meat Rack—being a safe haven for repressed gay men to fully express and experience their sexuality.In this episode, we’re diving into the island's rich history, tracing its evolution from a secluded getaway for artists and bohemians to a thriving vacation destination for the queer community, and discussing the growing threat it faces from the impacts of climate change.Additional Resources:24. Gay Villages: Won't You Be My Gaybor?Fire Island FactsOrigin of "Fire Island"A History of Early Sayville by Clarissa EdwardsThe Seal Island Legend by Robert H. SpencerThe History of Fire IslandOnce Upon a Time There Was a Place Called Fire IslandThe Very Gay History of Fire IslandThe Meat Rack on Fire Island Est. 1950’sThe Botel History Est. 19601968: After Dozens Of Acquittals, Police Forced To End Raids On Gay HavenBefore Stonewall, Cherry Grove: How a Beach Town Became a Gay 'Safe Haven'19. The Queer History of DiscoHidden in a Fire Island House, the Soundtrack of Loss and LoveThe GMHC Morning Party 1983-1990Fire Island's LGBTQ HeritageFire Island National Seashore Action PlanGet Your MerchSupport the showGet Your Merch

As gay men, we may experience complexities surrounding modern dating and societal pressures that often place unrealistic expectations of romantic and personal fulfillment. So when we think we’ve found “The One,” what do we do when they break up with us, telling us that we’re only seventy percent of what they need…while having sex?In this episode, author Jonathan Lee joins us to discuss his memoir, 40 Single Gay, which explores his personal journey of navigating love, relationships, and self-discovery as a gay man entering his forties.Additional Resources:40 Single Gay (Book)40 Single Gay (Instagram)Get Your MerchSupport the showGet Your Merch

In 1960s New York City, gay men needed a safe space to socialize without being arrested, which resulted in many frequenting private bottle clubs, like the Stonewall Inn, which was owned by the Mafia. On June 28, 1969, during a routine police raid, patrons were fed up and resisted.In this episode, we’re discussing the iconic Stonewall riots, which became a symbol of resistance to social and political discrimination that would inspire solidarity among homosexual groups for decades.Additional Resources:17. Mobsters & Mos: How the Mafia Owned Gay NightlifeStonewall RiotsThe Stonewall Riots: Coming Out in the StreetsStonewall RiotsGet Your MerchSupport the showGet Your Merch

Many gay men were taught that religion and sexuality are at odds with one another; either you're too gay to be religious, or you're too religious to be gay. As a result, we may have experienced religious trauma, leaving us feeling alone within our faith and the LGBGTQ+ community.In this episode, Eric Feltes, actor, writer, and life coach, joins us to discuss his spiritual journey, balancing sexuality and faith, and how gay men can overcome their religious trauma to live their authentic lives.Additional Resources:Eric Feltes - Life CoachingSend Eric an Email!The Great Unbecoming PodcastEric Feltes - InstagramEric Feltes - TikTokEric Feltes - YouTubeEric Feltes - IMDbGet Your MerchSupport the showGet Your Merch