A Jaded Gay

The mustache has traversed centuries, evolving from a symbol of prestige in ancient civilizations to a statement of rebellion in modern counterculture movements. In the 1960s and 1970s, it became an iconic symbol within the gay community, representing a form of self-expression, solidarity, and defiance against societal norms surrounding masculinity and sexuality.In this episode, we’re taking a look at the multifaceted history of the mustache, exploring its evolution as a symbol of masculinity, its significant sociosexual ties to the gay community in the 1960s and 1970s, and how it has created important conversations about men's health today.Additional Resources:Mustache vs. Moustache: Which is Correct?Mustache DefinitionMustachio DefinitionThe Statues of Rahotep and NofretThe Moustache: A Hairy HistoryWhy Peter the Great Established a Beard TaxAbout MovemberThe Mustache is Thriving. But What Does It Mean?A Sexual, Social and Political History of the MustacheCruisin’ With the Mustache Crew: Meet the Facial-Hair Style Taking Over Every Gay Bar in the CityOne Hairy Lip, a Mix of MessagesCastro CloneGay/Bi Men and Mustaches, a History in PhotosThe Rules of MovemberMovember DonationsGet Involved with MovemberGet Your MerchSupport the showGet Your Merch

Happy Halloween, my LGBTQuties! Previously, we discussed how queer themes have been depicted in horror for more than 250 years and that the genre has always been queer.In this episode, Ralph Anthony, host of the Scream Queer Podcast, joins us to dish on all things horror, determine which monsters are queer, and share a very spooky true-life horror story submitted by one of his listeners.Additional Resources:Listen to Scream Queer PodcastFollow Ralph Anthony on InstagramFollow Scream Queer Podcast on Instagram28. Gay HorrorGet Your MerchSupport the showGet Your Merch

Many gay men find solace and empowerment in spiritual practices like tarot, crystals, astrology, and witchcraft, as they offer a means of self-discovery and affirmation. Unlike modern organized religion, these ancient traditions provide a safe space for personal exploration, allowing individuals to connect with their inner selves and find strength in their unique identities.In this episode, we’re exploring the trend of embracing more spiritual beliefs and the parallels between queerness and various practices, including astrology, tarot, and witchcraft.Additional Resources:48. Plant Gays and Mindfulness LessonsLGBT Identification in U.S. Ticks Up to 7.1%Must Reads: How Millennials Replaced Religion with Astrology and CrystalsChani Nicholas Explains Why Queer People Love Astrology24. Gay Villages: Won't You Be My Gaybor?So, Why Are Queer People So Interested in Astrology?19. The Queer History of DiscoThe Rise of Queer AstrologyQueer Tarot: A Brief Story of Meaning and HealingWhy Do Gay Men Love Witches?Exploring the Links Between Queer Culture and WitchcraftGet Your MerchSupport the showGet Your Merch

Ghosting has become an increasingly prevalent phenomenon in today's dating culture, reflecting a shift towards digital communication and a reluctance to confront uncomfortable conversations. For gay men, this can be attributed to the influence of hookup apps, a larger pool of potential partners, and societal pressures, leading to a higher likelihood of casual and transient interactions.In today’s episode, we’re discussing what ghosting is, how we can avoid being ghosted, and empowering self-care strategies for those who've experienced this common but often painful experience.Additional Resources:Ghosting (Definition)Ghosting (Psychology Today)Ghosting (Grammarist)Psychological Correlates of Ghosting and Breadcrumbing Experiences: A Preliminary Study among Adults8 Reasons You’ve Been Ghosted15. Understanding Attachment StylesWhat Is Ghosting—and Why Is It So Rude?Survey Reveals ‘Ghosting’ Impacts 76% Of People Who Are Dating—Plus The States With The Biggest OffendersThe Mental Health Effects of GhostingLGBTQ Ghosting: Why We Do It and How to Deal With ItGet Your MerchSupport the showGet Your Merch

Coming out is a deeply personal and pivotal moment for LGBTQ+ individuals, encompassing the courageous act of sharing their authentic identity with others, fostering self-acceptance, and seeking understanding and validation.In this episode, we’re taking a look at the origins of the concept of “coming out” and National Coming Out Day, the importance of being our authentic selves, and how we can feel empowered in our decision to live openly.Additional Resources:Listen to My Coming Out StoryComing Out DefinitionThe History Behind Why We Say a Person 'Came Out of the Closet'Gay New York: Gender, Urban Culture, and the Making of the Gay Male WorldThe Gay Metropolis: The Landmark History of Gay Life in AmericaA Brief History of Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender Social MovementsWhere Did the Phrase 'Come Out of the Closet' Come From?Sexual Orientation and Gender Diversity51. ACT UP: Silence = DeathUnderstanding Sexual Orientation and HomosexualityThe Process of Coming OutStages in the Coming Out ProcessComing Out and Mental HealthComing Out is Good for Our Mental Health20 Things to Know Before You Come Out and How to Go About ItHow Do I Come Out?Why Do We Need National Coming Out Day?This is Why Coming Out is Important (Even After You've Come Out)Coming Out as LGBTQ+ in AdulthoodThe Coming Out HandbookGet Your MerchSupport the showGet Your Merch

Conversion therapy is a discredited and harmful practice that attempts to change a person's sexual orientation or gender identity, often using psychological or religious methods, which can lead to severe emotional distress, trauma, and a negative impact on mental health and well-being.In this episode, Seth Showalter, a licensed clinical social worker, joins us to talk about his new book, Finally Free, which details his experiences undergoing conversion therapy and how he’s taken steps to deconstruct the harmful rhetoric he was exposed to as he works to accept his authentic self.Additional Resources:Buy Finally FreeLearn More About SethCheck Out Mental Health UncoveredFollow Seth on InstagramFollow Seth on TikTokGet Your MerchSupport the showGet Your Merch

Previously, we discussed the complicated relationship gay men have with alcohol, which is shaped by diverse factors such as social acceptance, coping with discrimination, and navigating the intersection of LGBTQ+ identity and substance use.In this episode, writer and lawyer Tate Barkley joins us to talk about his new book, Sunday Dinners, Moonshine and Men, detailing a Southern boy’s story of coming to terms with his sexuality while surviving in a good ole boys’ world.Additional Resources:56. LGBTQ+ AlcoholismShop Sunday Dinners, Moonshine and Men (Amazon)Shop Sunday Dinners, Moonshine and Men (Bookshop.org)Learn More About TateGet Your MerchSupport the showGet Your Merch

Previously, we talked about how many gay men have grappled with the fear of rejection, which can result in struggling with intimacy, attachment, and emotional availability. This can often be interconnected with trust issues, as past experiences of feeling abandoned or rejected can lead to difficulties in fully trusting others in future relationships.In this episode, we’re taking a look at what trust issues are, their profound impact on gay men, and how we can foster authentic connections and rebuild trust in both ourselves and others.Additional Resources:47. Say Goodbye to Abandonment IssuesTrust Issues Definition (Urban Dictionary)Signs of Trust IssuesTrust Issues: Why Is It So Hard for Some People to Trust?15. Understanding Attachment StylesTrust IssuesHow to Cope When Trusting Is a ChallengeThe State of Personal TrustUnderstanding the Trust-Control Nexus13 Signs of Trust Issues & How to Get Over Them42. Are You Emotionally Unavailable‪?‬Why You May Have Trust Issues and How to Overcome ThemHow to Fix Trust Issues in a RelationshipHow to Deal With Trust IssuesWhy is it so Difficult for Some Gay Men to Find a Partner?Get Your MerchSupport the showGet Your Merch

The stereotype of brunch being gay has emerged as a playful nod to the LGBTQ+ community's affinity for this leisurely meal. But, upon deeper examination, the history of brunch has always been a bit controversial, breaking away from conventional standards.In this episode, we're discussing the history of brunch and why it’s become a cherished tradition within queer culture, serving as a safe space for self-expression, connection, and a delicious way to challenge societal norms.Additional Resources:Brunch (Merriam-Webster)Brunch (Urban Dictionary)The History of BrunchWhy Gay Men Love to BrunchIs Brunch "Gay"? Twitter DebatesBrunch Has Always Been QueerThe Extraordinary Rise of Drag Brunch: A Dining Delight or a Betrayal of Queer History?63. The Stonewall Riots49. Let's Shatter the LGBTQ+ Wage GapA Brief (and Depressing) History of LGBT Workers’ RightsUPDATED Report: Drag Events Faced More than 160 Protests and Significant Threats Since Early 2022Anti-Drag Legislation Is Sweeping the Nation: Here's Where Each State Stands on Drag BansPetition: Don't Mess with DragWhy Gay Brunch MattersGet Your MerchSupport the showGet Your Merch

Previously, we discussed the complicated relationship gay men have with alcohol, which is shaped by diverse factors such as social acceptance, coping with discrimination, and navigating the intersection of LGBTQ+ identity and substance use.In this episode, writer, director, and filmmaker Adam Fitzgerald joins us to talk about his new book, Recovering from Recovery, which explores his journey away from rhetoric and advice he experienced in Alcoholics Anonymous, which seemed to judge and stigmatize his sexuality.Additional Resources:56. LGBTQ+ AlcoholismBuy Recovering from RecoveryAdam Fitzgerald (Instagram)Adam Fitzgerald (TikTok)Adam Fitzgerald (Twitter)Get Your MerchSupport the showGet Your Merch