ADHD with Jenna Free

Find out why ADHD symptoms can feel worse as you age, and it's not just aging! Hormonal changes during perimenopause and menopause disrupt dopamine regulation, leading to emotional dysregulation. Jenna shares what this dysregulation looks like and offers three supportive strategies. The pressure of societal expectations around aging also plays a significant role in how we perceive ourselves. Personal stories and celebrity examples highlight the importance of embracing aging with confidence and recognizing the difference between discomfort and genuine threats.

You can get your free ADHD Regulation Guide here - www.adhdwithjennafree.com/adhdguide Chapters 00:00 Introduction: Meds and Regulation - Do They Go Together? 02:00 What ADHD Medication Actually Does 04:00 The Gas vs The Steering Wheel Analogy 06:00 Medication is a Tool, Not the Foundation 08:00 What ADHD Meds Can and Can't Do 10:00 Medication Can Magnify Your Current State 13:00 Trial and Error is Normal (And Expected) 15:00 Possible Side Effects and Who Can't Take Meds 17:00 Where Regulation Work Fits In Summary In this episode, I clarify my stance on ADHD medication and where it fits with regulation work. This isn't about whether you should or shouldn't take meds - that's deeply personal. But I want to give you context on what to expect and why both can work together beautifully. ADHD medication and regulation do two very different things. Medication is like gas in your tank - it helps with attention, impulsivity, working memory, and brain fog. But regulation provides the steering wheel, brakes, and pedals - it gives you the ability to actually maneuver with that energy. Medication doesn't regulate your nervous system, change fear-based beliefs, or get you out of fight or flight. I share results from a poll where the most common response about what meds help with was "I don't know" - which shows how important it is to get clear on what you want from medication. Medication can magnify the state you're in, so if you're dysregulated, stimulants might intensify that frantic energy. Whether meds work for you or not, regulation work should be the foundation - it helps every ADHDer with no side effects or downsides. Action Step This week, if you're on ADHD medication, get really honest with yourself: What do I want from my medication? Is it doing what I want it to do? How do I actually feel on it - not just "am I more productive" but am I present, am I happy, am I enjoying my day, or am I just anxious and getting more paperwork done? You are the expert on how it feels in your body. If you don't love how you feel, it doesn't mean meds aren't right for you or that you don't have ADHD - it might mean you need a dosage change or different type. Talk to your doctor about it. And whether you're on meds or not, start or continue regulation work as your foundation - it's accessible to everyone and helps with or without medication. Takeaways ADHD medication and regulation work together - meds are like gas in the tank (performance enhancer for brain functions), regulation is the steering wheel, brakes, and pedals (ability to maneuver that energy) Medication helps with attention, impulsivity, working memory, and brain fog, but it doesn't regulate your nervous system, change fear-based beliefs, or get you out of fight or flight Medication can magnify the state you're in - if you're dysregulated, stimulants might intensify that frantic energy rather than help Get clear on what you want from medication and whether it's actually doing that - you're the expert on how it feels in your body, not a chart or your doctor Regulation work is the foundation that helps every ADHDer with no side effects or downsides - whether you take meds or not, regulation should be the base everything else builds on Connect with Me Instagram TikTok

You can get your free ADHD Regulation Guide here - www.adhdwithjennafree.com/adhdguide Join the waitlist for ADHD Groups (starting January) - www.adhdwithjennafree.com/groups Chapters 00:00 Introduction: Worrying What People Think 01:00 The Fawn Response: A Safety Mechanism 03:00 The Trap of External Regulation 05:00 It's Safe to Be Misunderstood 07:00 My Garbage Bag Story: Regulation in Action 09:00 How Fawn Costs Us Our Lives 11:00 The Fear No Longer Drives the Bus 13:00 Practice: Who Am I Trying to Keep Safe? 16:00 Building Freedom Through Tiny Moments 18:00 Their Dysregulation Doesn't Have to Be Mine Summary In this episode, I talk about ADHD people pleasing and the fawn response - why worrying what people think isn't about being nice, it's a nervous system safety response. If you've ever changed what you were going to do because of what someone might think (even a stranger), this is for you. For people with ADHD and chronic dysregulation, the fawn response makes us believe that keeping everyone happy, approved of, and not upset is what keeps us safe. When we've lived in fight or flight for years, our body reads conflict, judgment, or criticism as life-threatening danger - even though logically we know it's not. I explain how this people pleasing pattern is actually external regulation, where we try to control what other people think so we can feel calmer and safer. But here's the trap: when we worry what people think, we're not actually hearing them - we're hearing ourselves and reacting to imaginary opinions as if they're facts. I share a personal story about taking out the garbage with a plastic bag on my head (conditioner treatment) when construction workers were outside, and how I caught myself in the fawn response and chose to do it anyway to show my nervous system I'm safe. The fawn response costs us a lot - we live smaller, shape our lives around imaginary opinions, delay what we want, and let fear dictate our decisions. When we start regulating, we stop needing other people's approval to feel safe. We can handle being misunderstood, judged, or criticized because we know we're safe regardless. This episode gives you a practice to start breaking down these walls and building freedom through tiny moments of choosing what you want to do instead of what feels safest. Action Step This week, catch yourself hesitating or about to change what you're doing because of what someone might think. Pause and ask: "Who am I trying to keep safe right now? What am I fearing?" Notice the specific worry - are you worried your coworker will think you're lazy if you take a break? That someone will judge you? Once you're aware, take one small step toward what you actually want to do. Push yourself just a little past that discomfort (not obliterating your comfort zone, just stretching it). Go grab that coffee, take that break, ask for that help. See if you can collect evidence that you're safe even when people might be thinking things about you. Remember: their potential thoughts are not dangerous. You are safe. Takeaways ADHD people pleasing isn't about being nice - it's the fawn response, a nervous system safety mechanism where your body believes keeping everyone happy is what keeps you safe When we worry what people think, we're not hearing them - we're hearing ourselves and reacting to imaginary opinions as if they're facts The fawn response costs us our lives - we live smaller, delay what we want, and let 10% (or way more) of our decisions be dictated by imaginary scenarios Real regulation means the fear no longer drives the bus - you can handle being misunderstood, judged, or criticized because you trust you're safe regardless Most people aren't thinking about you anyway - they're worried about what you think of them, and any judgment they do have is usually their dysregulation talking Connect with Me Instagram TikTok

Shift your perspective on ADHD regulation! The discussion dives into why surface-level tips and tricks fail to create lasting change. Explore the importance of internal regulation over external coping methods. Learn how to work through your nervous system, examine your beliefs, and shift toward sustainable behaviors. Discover that true regulation requires deeper understanding and patience, along with practical cues to help you notice your body's responses. Real change is all about internal transformation, not just quick fixes!

You can get your free ADHD Regulation Guide here - www.adhdwithjennafree.com/adhdguide Take the free Dysregulation Quiz here - https://adhdwithjennafree.typeform.com/adhdquiz Register for the ADHD at Work 2.0 Workshop - www.adhdwithjennafree.com/adhdwork Chapters 00:00 Introduction: ADHD at Work and the Severance Episode 01:00 When the Mental Boundary Between Work and Life Disappears 03:00 Why Everything Feels Urgent When You're Dysregulated 05:00 You Can't Work Your Way to Peace 06:00 Signs You've Lost Your Work-Life Severance 08:00 Regulating Your Body at Work and at Home 10:00 The Beliefs Behind Your Urgency 13:00 Regulating Your Behavior: Finding Balance 16:00 My Personal Experience with Work Boundaries 19:00 What Regulation Actually Looks Like 21:00 ADHD at Work 2.0 Workshop Announcement Summary In this episode, I talk about ADHD at work and how to actually put work in its place - not with better time management or productivity hacks, but with nervous system regulation. If you've ever been at your kid's soccer game and suddenly remembered an email you should have sent, and now your whole body feels uncomfortable until you send it, this is for you. I'm calling this "the Severance episode" after the TV show, because for ADHDers struggling with ADHD burnout and work-life balance, the mental boundary between work and life can completely disappear. I break down why ADHD makes it so hard to stop thinking about work, even when you desperately want to rest. When you're dysregulated, everything feels urgent - you can't stop thinking about work at home, but then when it's actually work time, you might be stuck in ADHD procrastination and overwhelm. It's the worst trap. I explain how working from dysregulation creates more dysregulation, so you'll never work yourself into peace. I also share the three types of regulation you need: body (slowing down, breathing, relaxing tension), mind (challenging beliefs like "if I don't stay on top of this, everything will fall apart"), and behavior (creating consistency instead of extreme work patterns). I share my own journey from obsessively thinking about work 24/7 to now having natural boundaries and actually feeling done at the end of the day. This episode will help you understand why ADHD at work feels so exhausting and what you can actually do about it. Action Step This week, pick one area to start practicing regulation. For your body: slow your walking between meetings or around your house, bring your shoulders down from your ears, and check if you're breathing or holding your breath. For your mind: notice when you feel urgent and ask yourself "what belief is driving this urgency?" Is it "if I don't stay on top of this, everything will fall apart" or "if I'm not thinking about it, I'll forget something"? For your behavior: set a quitting time and actually stop, regardless of how much you got done. Notice when you think "just one more email" - that's dysregulation trying to externally regulate. Start small with whichever feels most doable. Takeaways For dysregulated ADHD brains, the mental boundary between work and life can completely disappear When you're dysregulated, everything feels urgent - this is why you can't stop thinking about work You can't work your way to peace - working from dysregulation creates more dysregulation Three types of regulation: body (slow down, breathe, relax tension), mind (challenge beliefs behind urgency), behavior (create consistency instead of extremes) Regulation gives you the internal ability to turn work off when you want rest, and turn it on when you want to work - that's the real skill Connect with Me Instagram TikTok

Take the free Dysregulation Quiz here - https://adhdwithjennafree.typeform.com/adhdquiz Join the waitlist for ADHD Groups (starting January) - www.adhdwithjennafree.com/groups You can get your free ADHD Regulation Guide here - www.adhdwithjennafree.com/adhdguide Chapters 00:00 Introduction to Boredom and ADHD 01:00 What Does "Boring" Really Mean? 03:00 Boredom as a Nervous System Mechanism 05:00 When Dysregulation Feels Like Boredom 08:00 Boredom Can Be a Motivator for Change 10:00 The Mismatch Between Your State and the Task 12:00 Is Regulation Boring? (Spoiler: No) 15:00 This Week's Practice: Notice Your Body During "Boring" Tasks Summary In this episode, I talk about ADHD and boredom - something I hear constantly from ADHDers struggling with procrastination and task avoidance. If you've ever said "it's just too boring, I can't do it" about laundry, dishes, emails, or paperwork, this episode is for you. I break down why ADHD makes certain tasks feel unbearably boring, and spoiler - it's not actually about the task itself. It's about ADHD dysregulation showing up as physical discomfort. That crawling-out-of-your-skin feeling when you're trying to focus on "boring" tasks? That's your nervous system, not lack of willpower. Using a real example from one of my ADHD regulation group members who couldn't do her taxes (not because they were hard, but because the ADHD overwhelm and boredom felt like a physical wall), I explain how ADHD procrastination is often really a mismatch between your nervous system state and what the task requires. When your ADHD brain is in fight or flight but the task needs calm, steady focus - that's when everyday tasks feel impossible. I also address the fear that ADHD regulation sounds boring, because we confuse dysregulation with excitement. But the stress chemistry of running late and doing things last minute isn't fun - it's exhausting. ADHD regulation gives you real free time, actual relaxation, better focus, and improved self-esteem. Way more exciting than chaos. Action Step This week, when you catch yourself saying "this is boring," pause and get curious. What does your body actually feel right now? Pick one task you've been avoiding because it's "boring" - folding laundry, washing dishes, filling out a form - and do it while really noticing what's happening in your body. Are you restless? Rushing to get it over with? Feeling physically uncomfortable? Take a breath and see if you can slow down and match your internal energy to what the task actually requires (which is usually pretty calm and steady). Notice if slowing down and matching the energy makes it less painful. I'd love to hear what you discover. Takeaways Boredom for ADHD brains is often actually dysregulation showing up as physical discomfort - tension, restlessness, that crawling-out-of-your-skin feeling The real issue is a mismatch: your internal state is heightened (fight or flight) but the task requires calm, steady action For dysregulated ADHD brains, stillness and calm can feel threatening instead of soothing Regulation isn't about forcing focus - it's about shifting your internal state so the task doesn't feel like a threat We confuse dysregulation with excitement, but that "excitement" is really just stress chemistry (cortisol and adrenaline) A regulated life gives you real free time, actual relaxation, and better self-esteem - way more exciting than chaos When you're uncomfortable during a task, it's usually because your system has revved up and started rushing Sometimes boredom is a signal that something needs to change, but often we're calling dysregulation "boredom" and avoiding things we actually want to get done Connect with Me Instagram TikTok

Dive into the fascinating world of belief schemas that shape our experiences and regulate our emotions. Discover how common beliefs like 'I'm behind' can paralyze rather than propel us forward. Explore the link between these beliefs and our nervous system responses, revealing how perfectionism acts as a hidden survival strategy. Learn actionable steps to name, connect, and update these deep-rooted beliefs, empowering you to rewrite your brain’s story and embrace reality over potential.

Join the waitlist for ADHD Groups (starting January) - adhdwithjennafree.com/groups You can get your free ADHD Regulation Guide here - adhdwithjennafree.com/adhdguide Chapters 00:00 Introduction to Maladaptive Regulation 01:00 What is Maladaptive Regulation? 03:00 Why Self-Compassion Matters 04:00 The Calendar Research Trap Example 06:00 The Scroll and Clean Cycles 08:00 Compulsive vs. Conscious Choices 09:00 Who's Driving Your Regulation Ship? 11:00 Survival Mode vs. Long-Term Goals 13:00 You're Not Actually in Danger 15:00 Bringing Patterns Into Consciousness 17:00 The Three Pieces - Body, Brain, Behavior 19:00 Implementation Over Information 21:00 What is Your Body Protecting You From? 23:00 Finding Real Safety and Regulation Summary In this episode, I explore maladaptive regulation - those automatic things we do that temporarily soothe us but ultimately keep us stuck in dysregulation. I explain how scrolling, cleaning before starting work, researching the "perfect" calendar system, and even rumination are your nervous system's unconscious attempts to regulate, not character flaws or laziness. When we leave regulation to our subconscious and nervous system, they prioritize immediate survival over long-term goals, keeping us in circles rather than moving forward. Using powerful examples (like a client who spent months researching calendars instead of using one, or buying a $950 calendar system that never got used), I demonstrate how these patterns work and why awareness is the critical first step. This episode teaches you how to shift from unconscious maladaptive regulation to intentional regulation by working with your body, brain, and behavior. Action Step The next time you catch yourself in a maladaptive regulation pattern (scrolling, procrastinating, overthinking, etc.), pause and ask yourself: "What is my body trying to protect me from right now?" Notice any physical tension or discomfort. This simple question begins to shift you from automatic regulation to intentional regulation by bringing awareness to what's happening beneath the surface. Takeaways Maladaptive regulation is your system's unconscious attempt to feel safer, not a character flaw. Common examples include scrolling, shopping, cleaning to avoid tasks, researching endlessly, rumination, and overcompensating. When it's compulsive (you can't stop yourself), that's maladaptive regulation, not a conscious choice. Your subconscious and nervous system only care about immediate survival, not long-term goals. These strategies work in the short term but create long-term pain and keep you stuck in circles. The pattern is: temporary relief → guilt/shame → deeper dysregulation. Over 80% of ADHDers feel self-compassion is a "cop out" - but it's actually essential for regulation. You're likely not in actual danger, but your system acts as if you are (survival mode). Real regulation requires the conscious mind to "take the wheel" from automatic patterns. The three pieces of intentional regulation: Body (physical interruption), Brain (cognitive reframe), Behavior (finding balance). The power is in implementation, not collecting more information (which itself can be maladaptive regulation). Awareness of maladaptive regulation patterns is always the first critical step. Connect with Me Instagram TikTok

Join the waitlist for ADHD Groups here - adhdwithjennafree.com/groups You can get your free ADHD Regulation Guide here - adhdwithjennafree.com/adhdguide Chapters 00:00 Introduction to Vulnerability and ADHD 01:00 What Vulnerability Really Means 03:00 Personal Example - Group Launch Protection 05:00 Subconscious Self-Protection Mechanisms 07:00 Why Vulnerability Feels Dangerous 09:00 How This Shows Up in Different Life Areas 11:00 The Gift of Being Vulnerable 13:00 Getting Your Hopes Up vs. Playing It Safe 15:00 Making Vulnerability Feel Safer 17:00 Reflection Questions and Acting Class Example 20:00 Taking Small Steps Forward Summary In this episode, I explore the often-overlooked connection between ADHD, dysregulation, and our ability to be vulnerable. I explain how vulnerability isn't just about sharing feelings with others - it's about the willingness to try things without guarantees, to be seen trying, to risk disappointment. When we're in fight or flight, our nervous system confuses emotional risk with physical danger, causing us to back away from the very things we want most. Using personal examples (including my own experience of cutting a group launch short to avoid potential disappointment), I demonstrate how dysregulation makes us pump the brakes on our goals, relationships, and dreams - not consciously, but as a self-protection mechanism. This episode offers practical ways to start building safety around vulnerability so you can actually go for what you want in life. Action Step: Notice one place this week where you're backing off from what you really want because it feels too vulnerable. Ask yourself: Is this dangerous or just uncomfortable? Then make one tiny step forward - go to one yoga class, mention your interest in a promotion once, or try something new without committing fully. The goal is to get evidence that it's safe to try, even if the outcome is uncertain. Takeaways Vulnerability means being willing to be seen, take emotional risks, and try without guarantees. When dysregulated, even admitting to yourself that you want something can feel too scary. Our nervous system confuses emotional risk (disappointment, embarrassment) with physical danger. We often pump the brakes on our goals subconsciously to avoid potential disappointment. This shows up everywhere - work, relationships, hobbies, self-care, and even regulation work itself. The real risk of vulnerability is just uncomfortable feelings, not actual danger. "Don't get your hopes up" is a dysregulated response that actually decreases your chances of success. You miss 100% of the shots you don't take - backing off guarantees failure. Being vulnerable with yourself (not just others) is crucial for moving forward in life. Small exposures to vulnerability build evidence that it's safe to try and want things. All feelings, including disappointment and embarrassment, are safe to feel. Living without the ability to be vulnerable keeps you trapped and limits your life significantly. Connect with Me Instagram TikTok

Join ADHD Groups starting October 20th - adhdwithjennafree.com/groups Watch the free ADHD Regulation Masterclass (available until October 19th) - adhdwithjennafree.com/masterclass You can get your free ADHD Regulation Guide here - adhdwithjennafree.com/adhdguide Chapters 00:00 ADHD Groups Are Open - Join Now 01:00 What is Executive Functioning? 02:00 Self-Regulation and Daily Life Management 04:00 Executive Functioning as Goal-Directed Action 05:00 Can You Increase Executive Functioning? 07:00 The Blindfold Analogy 09:00 Perception Changes Everything 11:00 The Cost of Chronic Fight or Flight 13:00 Client Success Story - PhD Dissertation 15:00 The Power of Believing Change is Possible 16:00 Action Step - Shifting Your Perception 19:00 Working Through Resistance Summary In this episode, I dive deep into executive functioning - what it is, why ADHDers struggle with it, and most importantly, whether you can actually improve it. I explain how being in chronic fight or flight dramatically impairs executive functioning by redirecting blood flow away from your prefrontal cortex. Using real client examples, I demonstrate how regulation work can dramatically increase your ability to focus, plan, and execute tasks. I share a powerful action step about shifting your perception from seeing a "brick wall" of tasks to a "brick path" you can take one step at a time. This episode challenges the belief that executive dysfunction is permanent and shows you exactly why regulation work is the key to unlocking your true cognitive capacity. Action Step: Practice shifting your perception this week. When you notice feeling overwhelmed by your to-do list or the day ahead (the "brick wall"), mentally lay it down as a "brick path." Identify just the one next step in front of you right now. Focus only on that present moment action, taking it one brick at a time. This trains your brain to think linearly, reduces overwhelm, and signals safety to your nervous system. Takeaways Executive functioning is the management system of your brain that coordinates thoughts and behaviors toward goals. Key components include working memory, cognitive flexibility, and impulse control. Fight or flight significantly impairs executive functioning by redirecting blood flow from the prefrontal cortex. You likely don't know your true executive functioning capacity because you've been dysregulated since childhood. Getting out of fight or flight removes the dampening effect on your cognitive abilities. Your perception of tasks changes dramatically when dysregulated - everything feels overwhelming. Being in chronic fight or flight means suffering all the negative effects without actual danger. Real example: A client finished her PhD dissertation in 4 months after 2 years of being stuck. Believing improvement is possible is the first critical step to making progress. You can only take action in the present moment - hypervigilance about future steps is counterproductive. Resistance to regulation work is normal and comes from your dysregulated system trying to protect you. Connect with Me Instagram TikTok