Make Some Noise with Andrea Owen

This week on the podcast I have another coaching episode for you. Long-time YKAL community member and Patron, Corrina joins me. She is a working mom from Toronto who needed help with prioritizing time for her own self-care. Here is what I love about this episode, not only is Corrina a loyal listener of the show, our conversation starts out on one topic and ends up going in a different direction. If you’ve listened to some of my past coaching sessions, you’ve come to learn that’s typically how my sessions go. And I love it. 🙌🙌🙌 Our conversation went from what seemed like a “simple” struggle (and I use the word simple loosely because nothing is ever simple in self-help) and turned to having (or in this case not having) support or help around the household. We discussed partnerships, having hard conversations and how to ask for what you need from your partner, with compassion and gratitude. The health of any relationship rests on the reciprocity of love, trust, and the work it takes to create a household. Corrina and I explore this topic together and come up with a possible solution to her current struggles. As you will hear, Corrina learns that prioritizing means reaching out for help so she can make more, “Yes” decisions for her own wellbeing. In this episode you’ll hear: Corrina’s struggle with prioritizing and making time for self-care (6:01) Working through her feeling of shame when it comes to taking care of the home (ie: home not in order or clean) (9:00) Realizing that you can’t do all the things, all the time without feeling resentful (9:21) Communicating the severity of the lack of support around the household and having hard conversations with a partner (18:37) Finding the line between realistic and unrealistic expectations and not trusting your own voice (22:06) Acknowledging and leaning into each other’s love languages (33:21) Telling your partner what you want and need from your relationship with compassion and gratitude (36:00) http://yourkickasslife.com/304  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

💥Special announcement, ass kickers! Amy Smith and I are starting a new podcast that will focus on hilarious stories, PLUS answering your burning questions! You’ll hear more about it in the intro to this episode, and you can ask your questions HERE. 💥This week I welcome back returning guest, Erin Stutland! Erin is a renowned author and mind-body wellness expert and the host and life-style coach of Z Living’s cable series, Altar’d. I reference her work often and I am thrilled to have her back to talk about her book, Mantras in Motion. We live in a culture where we spend a lot of time in our own heads. And while it’s comfortable there, it can hold us back. Today Erin describes how movement in our bodies can lead to inspired action and movement in our lives. We talk about how her work and her book help clear out beliefs holding you back and what it means to move well. We also explore the topic of our “own brands of existence,” (aka: the inner critic), and some ways to move away from them. While the whole concept of getting into our bodies, out of our heads, and moving can seem foreign, Erin introduces us to it in such a way that it makes sense and is easy to implement. It’s time to move. 💃In this episode you’ll hear: The catalyst for writing her book, Mantras in Motion, and what readers can expect from it (9:00) The purpose for combining movement with mantras and helping people reconnect to their bodies; and what the movement might actually look like (11:27) Some ways we can get out of our head and get connected with our bodies (18:00) How movement in your body can create movement in your life (24:16) What Erin means when she uses the word resistance and some ways to move forward from it (25:13) http://yourkickasslife.com/303  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

This week I welcome Chase Chewning to the YKAL podcast. Chase is the creator of the platform Ever Forward and host of the podcast Ever Forward Radio. I’ve been on his podcast twice and y’all, he is an amazing host who is doing phenomenal things in the wellness industry (and wait until you hear his radio voice. Just wait). Today we take on big topics such as mental health, the revolution in masculinity and moving ever forward no matter the circumstance. Chase shares openly with me the physical, emotional, and spiritual trauma he experienced following a serious hip injury, which led to being medically discharged from the military and having to learn to walk again. And like many of the conversations I have with my guests, ours shifted to topics I did not expect but am so glad they did. We discussed the stories men (and women) sometimes make up about what it means to be a man (as in hiding one’s emotions) and how a revolution in masculinity is flipping those stories on their heads. As Chase so eloquently stated, “Every area of your life will be significantly better once you get honest, look inside, and allow yourself to feel.” Yes, we got a bit deep, philosophical, and real in this episode. But as you’ll hear at the top of the show, it’s important to be the person you were meant to be. This episode is a perfect example of Chase and I, doing just that. In this episode you’ll hear: The physical, emotional, and spiritual trauma Chase experienced following medical discharge from the military due to a hip injury and having to learn to walk again (11:00) Internal and external healing: who and what was most helpful to Chase (emotionally and physically) during his journey (19:00) Chase on the revolution in masculinity and the importance of women being present with a man while he shares his deepest and darkest fears (27:00) Coming to our own conclusions about religion and spirituality (35:00) Chase’s mantra, Ever Forward: what it means and why it matters so much to him (47:09) http://yourkickasslife.com/302  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

I have such a great episode for you this week with my guest Sonya Renee Taylor. Sonya is an author, poet, spoken word artist, speaker, humanitarian, social justice activist, educator, and founder of The Body is Not An Apology. Today, we are talking all about radical self-love, body empowerment and how both can be a foundational tool for global transformation. When it comes to self-love, especially in the personal development space, it can be made to look easy, light, and fluffy. But as you’ll hear in this episode, Sonya believes, “Nothing grows without discomfort.” 100%, yes! Radical self-love requires us to challenge our deeply held beliefs which are keeping us locked in systems of status quo and latency. True radical self-love can help you see the world in a different way and help you shift it too. We also talk about body shaming, meta-shame and even a unique and affirming way to spread body empowerment among friends; which can move mountains y’all! I know I say this often, but I truly am excited to share with you my conversation with Sonya Renee Taylor.In this episode you’ll hear: Sonya’s journey and the path that led her to be recognized as a change agent (6:28) How radical self-love and body empowerment are foundational tools for social justice and global transformation (9:16) Sonya’s definition of radical self-love and why we need it (11:27) Body shaming, what it is, who does it and some ways to overcome it; plus one unique and affirming way to spread body empowerment among friends (17:00) The body positivity movement: where it started, why Sonya thinks it’s a “nice white lady,” and ways in which it can be harmful (26:00: Bad Picture Monday - what it is and how to find it on Instagram (32:00) http://yourkickasslife.com/301  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

As you may have heard (since I’ve been talking about it almost non-stop here), I’m still writing my book proposal for my third book. Book proposals are a slightly complicated, gigantic document that contains the summary of your book, who the book is for, and what magic fairies you’re going to conjure to help you sell the book. It contains other things too, but my point is, the way I describe writing book proposals is it’s like that school project you have that is enormously time-consuming, super boring, a metric shit-ton of work, and 99% of your grade is riding on it. Oh, and the class it’s for is the Big Enchilada Important Class. No big deal. As I’ve also mentioned before, this book will be slightly different than my first two. Still self-helpy, but it will have an edge. More opinionated. More in tune with what’s going on culturally and politically. And all of this is scary for me, as this entire year has been about healing, moving through all sorts of old shit, and leveling up. One of the things I’ve done to help myself is writing a letter to fear. Elizabeth Gilbert talks about this and I decided if it’s good enough for Liz, it’s good enough for me! In this week’s episode you’ll hear a few other things I’ve done to move through this time in my professional (and personal) life, and here is my letter to fear…Dear Fear, I’m not sure why I’m addressing you as “dear”, as you’re hardly dear to me in the least. Let me start with some compassion since you don’t necessarily deserve to be yelled at, berated, or chastised. So, I get it. I get why you’re doing what you’re doing. You know, or at least are very certain, that if I write a BIG book, (and by “BIG”, I mean with lots of opinions, and “with lots of opinions” I mean opinions that millions of women and men also have the same opinions. Oh, the irony) there is a HUGE risk involved. What if people disagree and write mean things about me on the internet? What if I don’t know enough about the topics and I’m criticized for that? But, I think the thing that scares you the most, is not bad reviews or haters...but the success of this book. With HTSFLS doing so well, this book has big shoes to fill. And by big shoes, I mean 100,000 copies in 16 months. A big book advance to PROVE how worthy my creativity is. Numbers have weight and there are so many numbers to contend with. To you, Fear, big numbers equal everything good and right in my life.... Read the rest of the letter HEREhttp://yourkickasslife.com/300  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Charlie Gilkey is back on the YKAL podcast this week, this time to talk about productivity with a twist. So many listeners offered such great feedback when he joined me on the podcast the first time around, that I knew I had to bring him back. For those of you new to Charlie, he is the founder of Productive Flourishing and the author of the new book, Start Finishing: How to Go From Idea to Done. Charlie helps people finish the stuff that matters. I mean, come on, we all could use a little bit of that in our lives, am I right? In this latest book, Charlie walks readers through some different perspectives around getting shit done, which we talk about in this episode. We touch on topics such as perfectionism and how it’s holding you back from reaching your goals, what to do when the naysayers or derailers don’t believe in your projects, and how to get motivated for a task you are dreading. Plus we talk understanding that you have moments of choice and how changing the way you talk to yourself (and about yourself) can change your life. This is a no-holds-barred conversation on productivity because quite honestly, it’s time to start finishing. In this episode you’ll hear: Why Start Finishing is different from other books on productivity (7:06) What to do when others don’t believe in your projects or ideas (20:00) How to get motivated to do the work you are dreading and what “confetti time” is (30:00) Fixing the load you are carrying so you can fix the overwhelm (35:04) Understanding you have moments of choice, changing your language and why it matters (39:00) http://yourkickasslife.com/299  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

We like the idea of hiring a life coach, the idea of listening to all the podcasts, the idea of reading all the books and then, many times we don’t actually do the personal development work. Yes, doing this kind of what I call “passive learning” does matter. You are getting it in between your ears (better than your inner-critic!). But, there does come a time when action needs to happen. This week I have another YKAL Coaching episode for you. And Marisa, whom I coach in this episode, is a perfect example of someone doing the work. Let’s get into this week’s coaching session. Meet Marisa, a new entrepreneur and recruiting agency employee from North Carolina. She came to me because she wanted to learn how to slow down, which we talk about in this episode. But like many coaching sessions, our conversation took a turn. We turned to the topic of values, including the difference between perfectionism and striving for excellence, as well as, Marisa’s values around integrity and patience. And then the conversation zig-zagged to the topic of triggers around feedback and how her mother, starting from a young age, has been the source of that trigger. This is big stuff, y’all and I am so honored that Marisa opened up and was vulnerable in this way. In this episode you’ll hear: Being okay with slowing down and getting into the mindset that when you are building a business, it’s okay to pause (6:10) Wanting a better perspective and clarity around why she launched her business and keeping the entrepreneur fire lit (7:58) Exploring Marisa’s value around patience and the realization that she isn’t giving herself the same love she gives others in that arena (10:00) There’s a difference between perfectionism and striving for excellence (12:45) Self-fulfillment and living a life that honors her true, ‘why’. (19:00) How to have a hard and honest conversation with a loved one, and how the health of personal relationships is bigger than we realize (24:00) A super kick-ass update from Marisa and how she’s been doing the work (46:30) http://yourkickasslife.com/298  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

This week’s guest is going to knock your socks off, y’all. Kara Loewentheil is Master Certified Coach who has pivoted her law career into a life coaching business, using her background in feminism theory to help women get the patriarchy out of their brains. Kara is also the host of the podcast, Unf*ck Your Brain and simply a stunning individual. In today’s episode we talk all about the social messaging we receive as women and how this messaging plays into our own self-critical thoughts. Kara also talks about the work she does with women to undo the process and help them to think about themselves the way they want to. I’ve been looking forward to introducing you to Kara and I hope you enjoy our conversation. In this episode you’ll hear: The reason women’s inner critic or not feeling good is a direct result of the patriarchy (6:00) You can’t suddenly be nicer to yourself (aka inner critic work) (10:30) How Kara addresses thought work and those who have experienced trauma and why thought work is so personal (14:56) “Believing harder” when it comes to self-confidence and overcoming insecurity (19:50) There’s a disconnect between women taking action to get the things they really want and what is keeping them stuck (25:10) Beauty standards, diet culture and Kara’s commentary about it all (31:19) http://yourkickasslife.com/297  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

I am delighted for this week’s episode; for two reasons. First, we are back with an episode of Conversations About Shit That Matters with Unqualified People. And second, the unqualified person joining me is none other than my bestie, Amy E. Smith. If this your first time hearing her, I know you will love her. And if this isn’t the first time hearing Amy, well, welcome back! This week, we’re talking all about money. Everyone’s experience is different when it comes to money. Our stories vary, our circumstances might be different, but so many of us struggle in the same areas when it comes to money and our emotions. Amy has been on her own money journey for some time now and she even influenced me, gave me pause and helped me realize that I had a lot of money issues I needed to work on too. In this conversation, we share some of our own experiences with money, as well as some tips and tools with doing the work around money. We hope our conversation is hugely eye-opening and helpful. Let’s get on with it! In this episode you’ll hear: Why we think women have a unique perspective around money hang-ups (6:06) Unpacking our money stories and our relationships with it (8:01) Doing the work and shifting our perspective about money (18:00) Comparing money and income to others and trying to make others comfortable with your circumstances, plus some other money hangups we are still working on today (35:00) We also share some of our most elaborate money dreams (45:00) http://yourkickasslife.com/296  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Raise your hand if you said yes to something you really didn’t want to do. And in doing so, you are saying no to something you actually WANT to do. It’s another exciting day here over YKAL headquarters, because it’s another coaching session episode. 🎉I really enjoy sharing these episodes and I hope you enjoy them too! This week I speak with Colleen, a professional dog walker, who wants to work through saying ‘No’ and putting herself first. I’m sure you’ll be able to relate to what Colleen is struggling with. Sometimes in your life you do have sacrifice in order to survive, which was Colleen’s case. But once you make it, it’s time to enjoy and make sure you are putting yourself first. When you are learning to say ‘No’, realize you are unlearning decades of conditioning. And this can be hard y’all. But at the end of the day, your life, your health matters. So, the hard work matters too. And that’s what Colleen and I dig into this YKAL coaching session. In this episode you’ll hear: Colleen’s struggle with tremendous guilt when saying ‘No’ to her customers (4:58) Anytime we are saying ‘No’ to something, we are saying ‘Yes’ to something else (7:46) Colleen’s lists of core beliefs when it comes to saying ‘No’ and then challenging them (10:58) What core beliefs are and where they stem from (17:46) Negativity bias, shifting your focus and finding positive examples of people who set boundaries (19:42) A kick-ass update from Colleen following our coaching session (46:19) http://yourkickasslife.com/295  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices