

Dateable: Your insider's look into modern dating and relationships
Yue Xu and Julie Krafchick
Is monogamy dead? Are we expecting too much from dating apps? Do we even want to find love anymore? Get all the answers and more with Dateable, your insider’s look into modern dating that the New York Times, HuffPost, and Oprah Daily call one of the top podcasts about dating, love, and relationships. Listen in as Yue Xu and Julie Krafchick dig into why we date the way we do. Together we'll navigate modern dating with more compassion, fun, and intention so you can create the love life you've always wanted!Join us every Wednesday as we talk to real daters and experts about the entire gamut of modern dating and relationships – from securing your anxious attachment, choosing the right partner for you, healing from your breakup to dating in your 30s and beyond. Make sure to send us your burning dating questions as we answer them every Sunday!If you're looking for a podcast that's relatable and full of emotional support and substance, then look no further. Let us be your biggest cheerleaders as you navigate dating in this crazy Dateable world.Send us your brunchtalk questions at hello@dateablepodcast.com or leave your question in a review!Follow us @dateablepodcast on IG and join the private 'Big Dateable Energy Facebook group. Check out our website for more content and join our Finding Your Person Program!: https://www.findingyourperson.com/Dateable is part of the Frolic Podcast Network. You can find more outstanding podcasts to subscribe to at frolic.media/podcasts
Episodes
Mentioned books

Aug 26, 2025 • 1h 6min
S21E2: The Compatibility Myth w/ Eli Finkel
How do you choose a partner that's a good match for you? We're joined with Eli Finkel, social psychologist and the Director of the Relationship & Motivation Lab at Northwestern University to debunk what matters and what doesn't when it comes to compatibility in relationships. We're discussing why initial shared interests and similar personalities might not be the strongest predictors of long-term satisfaction, the importance of the Michelangelo Effect, and how compatibility can be built even in the early stages of dating. Learn more about Eli Finkel and check out his podcast 'Love Factually" with Paul Eastwick and his book 'The All Or Nothing Marriage": https://elifinkel.com/Take the Dating Archetypes quiz now: https://howtobedateable.com/HOW TO BE DATEABLE IS OUT! Order now: https://howtobedateable.com/Follow us @dateablepodcast, @juliekrafchick and @nonplatonic. Check out our website for more content. Also listen to our other podcast Exit Interview available on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you get your podcasts.WE WROTE A BOOK! HOW TO BE DATEABLE (Simon & Schuster, Jan 2025) is available now: https://howtobedateable.com/
A big thank you to our sponsor Saily by NordVPN: "🌎 Get an exclusive 15% discount on your first Saily data plans! Use code DATEABLE at checkout. Download Saily app or go to to https://saily.com/dateable ⛵"Our Sponsors:* Mint Mobile: Get 3-months of Unlimited premium wireless service for 15 bucks a month. Upfront payment of $45 required (equivalent to $15/mo.). Limited time new customer offer for first 3 months only. Speeds may slow above 35GB on Unlimited plan. Taxes & fees extra. See MINT MOBILE for details and visit https://mintmobile.com/DATEABLE* Quince: Go to https://quince.com/dateable for free shipping and 365 day returns. * Washington Red Raspberries: Check out https://redrazz.org to learn about Washington Red Raspberris and get recipes and more!Support this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/dateable-your-insiders-look-into-modern-dating-and-relationships/donationsAdvertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Aug 24, 2025 • 26min
#brunchtalk: You Don't Need To Be Good At Dating
Yup, you heard us right. You don't need to be good at dating – at least the way we're dating today. We're back for all new brunch talk to dive into why after 10 years of doing a dating podcast, we believe that we're actually doing more that fosters disconnection than actual connection in today's dating world. Sure you can't be an utter train wreck, but we're talking about why some of the most common dating strategies fail, the three skills you don't actually need to build, and quick tweaks that instantly get you better results – and real connections. Got a dating question you need answered? Hit us up at hello@dateablepodcast.comGet OUR BOOK + take the Dating Archetypes quiz: https://howtobedateable.com/Follow us @dateablepodcast, @juliekrafchick and @nonplatonic. Check out our website for more content about modern dating. Also listen to our other podcast Exit Interview available on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you get your podcasts.WE WROTE A BOOK! HOW TO BE DATEABLE (Simon & Schuster, Jan 2025) is available now: https://howtobedateable.com/
A big thank you to our sponsor Saily by NordVPN: "🌎 Get an exclusive 15% discount on your first Saily data plans! Use code DATEABLE at checkout. Download Saily app or go to to https://saily.com/dateable ⛵"Our Sponsors:* Mint Mobile: Get 3-months of Unlimited premium wireless service for 15 bucks a month. Upfront payment of $45 required (equivalent to $15/mo.). Limited time new customer offer for first 3 months only. Speeds may slow above 35GB on Unlimited plan. Taxes & fees extra. See MINT MOBILE for details and visit https://mintmobile.com/DATEABLE* Quince: Go to https://quince.com/dateable for free shipping and 365 day returns. * Washington Red Raspberries: Check out https://redrazz.org to learn about Washington Red Raspberris and get recipes and more!Support this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/dateable-your-insiders-look-into-modern-dating-and-relationships/donationsAdvertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

5 snips
Aug 19, 2025 • 58min
S21E1: The Shift To Conscious Dating
We're back for SEASON 21 and we're reporting on the next biggest shift in dating, that takes dating intentionally one step further – and also removes the challenges that more 'purpose-driven' dating has caused in the last couple of years. So it's time to wake the f up as we shift into a world of conscious dating that in turn lead to relationships that have a level of depth and connection beyond our wildest dreams. We're discussing the core differences with dating intentionally, how to align your relationships with your highest self, and what it means to be in a conscious relationship (even if you're single AF today). Take the Dating Archetypes quiz now: https://howtobedateable.com/HOW TO BE DATEABLE IS OUT! Order now: https://howtobedateable.com/Follow us @dateablepodcast, @juliekrafchick and @nonplatonic. Check out our website for more content. Also listen to our other podcast Exit Interview available on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you get your podcasts.WE WROTE A BOOK! HOW TO BE DATEABLE (Simon & Schuster, Jan 2025) is available now: https://howtobedateable.com/
A big thank you to our sponsor Saily by NordVPN: "🌎 Get an exclusive 15% discount on your first Saily data plans! Use code DATEABLE at checkout. Download Saily app or go to to https://saily.com/dateable ⛵"Our Sponsors:* Mint Mobile: Get 3-months of Unlimited premium wireless service for 15 bucks a month. Upfront payment of $45 required (equivalent to $15/mo.). Limited time new customer offer for first 3 months only. Speeds may slow above 35GB on Unlimited plan. Taxes & fees extra. See MINT MOBILE for details and visit https://mintmobile.com/DATEABLE* Quince: Go to https://quince.com/dateable for free shipping and 365 day returns. * Washington Red Raspberries: Check out https://redrazz.org to learn about Washington Red Raspberris and get recipes and more!Support this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/dateable-your-insiders-look-into-modern-dating-and-relationships/donationsAdvertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Aug 17, 2025 • 15min
#brunchtalk: Is Being Too Interested A Turn Off?
Sure you want someone interested but can they be too interested? Or has anyone every told you that you come off too eager? In this week's #brunchtalk episode, we're discussing the perception of interest in dating, how to move forward if someone shares this type of feedback with you, and ways that you can evaluate your own approach to dating based on how you evaluate interest levels.Got a dating question you need answered? Hit us up at hello@dateablepodcast.comGet OUR BOOK + take the Dating Archetypes quiz: https://howtobedateable.com/Follow us @dateablepodcast, @juliekrafchick and @nonplatonic. Check out our website for more content about modern dating. Also listen to our other podcast Exit Interview available on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you get your podcasts.WE WROTE A BOOK! HOW TO BE DATEABLE (Simon & Schuster, Jan 2025) is available now: https://howtobedateable.com/
A big thank you to our sponsor Saily by NordVPN: "🌎 Get an exclusive 15% discount on your first Saily data plans! Use code DATEABLE at checkout. Download Saily app or go to to https://saily.com/dateable ⛵"Our Sponsors:* Mint Mobile: Get 3-months of Unlimited premium wireless service for 15 bucks a month. Upfront payment of $45 required (equivalent to $15/mo.). Limited time new customer offer for first 3 months only. Speeds may slow above 35GB on Unlimited plan. Taxes & fees extra. See MINT MOBILE for details and visit https://mintmobile.com/DATEABLE* Quince: Go to https://quince.com/dateable for free shipping and 365 day returns. * Washington Red Raspberries: Check out https://redrazz.org to learn about Washington Red Raspberris and get recipes and more!Support this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/dateable-your-insiders-look-into-modern-dating-and-relationships/donationsAdvertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Aug 12, 2025 • 1h 9min
What It Means To Be Dateable w/ John Kim
We're one week away from Season 21....so what else would we do but reminisce about our 21st birthdays as we usher in a new season of Dateable! But before the season begins, we're airing an episode we did with John Kim that talks about the complexities of modern dating, how cultural differences come into play, and the evolution of relationships in the digital age. We dive into the evolving definitions of love, the challenges of healthy relationships, share practical advice for becoming more dateable, and much more. Follow John @theangrytherapist, listen to The Angry Therapist Podcast, and check John's books 'Single. On Purpose' and 'Breakup. On Purpose"Check out our other episodes we did with John Kim on Dateable: S19E19: Breakup On PurposeE12E12: Single On PurposeGet OUR BOOK + take the Dating Archetypes quiz: https://howtobedateable.com/Follow us @dateablepodcast, @juliekrafchick and @nonplatonic. Check out our website for more content. Also listen to our other podcast Exit Interview available on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you get your podcasts.WE WROTE A BOOK! HOW TO BE DATEABLE (Simon & Schuster, Jan 2025) is available now: https://howtobedateable.com/
A big thank you to our sponsor Saily by NordVPN: "🌎 Get an exclusive 15% discount on your first Saily data plans! Use code DATEABLE at checkout. Download Saily app or go to to https://saily.com/dateable ⛵"Our Sponsors:* Mint Mobile: Get 3-months of Unlimited premium wireless service for 15 bucks a month. Upfront payment of $45 required (equivalent to $15/mo.). Limited time new customer offer for first 3 months only. Speeds may slow above 35GB on Unlimited plan. Taxes & fees extra. See MINT MOBILE for details and visit https://mintmobile.com/DATEABLE* Quince: Go to https://quince.com/dateable for free shipping and 365 day returns. * Washington Red Raspberries: Check out https://redrazz.org to learn about Washington Red Raspberris and get recipes and more!Support this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/dateable-your-insiders-look-into-modern-dating-and-relationships/donationsAdvertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Aug 10, 2025 • 17min
#brunchtalk: What To Do When You're Relationship Ends Out of Nowhere
You finally found someone you're into who is also into you. Until out of nowhere – it all blows up. If you've been here before, you know how painful it feels when it seems like the the rug was just pulled from under you unexpectedly We're breaking down the reasons this may happen and how to handle the emotional turmoil that comes from this. We discuss how to get closure without necessarily needing to know why this happened, the benefits of relationship check-ins expediting underlying issues, and ways to learn but not let these situation hold you back.Got a dating question you need answered? Hit us up at hello@dateablepodcast.comGet OUR BOOK + take the Dating Archetypes quiz: https://howtobedateable.com/Follow us @dateablepodcast, @juliekrafchick and @nonplatonic. Check out our website for more content about modern dating. Also listen to our other podcast Exit Interview available on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you get your podcasts.WE WROTE A BOOK! HOW TO BE DATEABLE (Simon & Schuster, Jan 2025) is available now: https://howtobedateable.com/
A big thank you to our sponsor Saily by NordVPN: "🌎 Get an exclusive 15% discount on your first Saily data plans! Use code DATEABLE at checkout. Download Saily app or go to to https://saily.com/dateable ⛵"Our Sponsors:* Mint Mobile: Get 3-months of Unlimited premium wireless service for 15 bucks a month. Upfront payment of $45 required (equivalent to $15/mo.). Limited time new customer offer for first 3 months only. Speeds may slow above 35GB on Unlimited plan. Taxes & fees extra. See MINT MOBILE for details and visit https://mintmobile.com/DATEABLE* Quince: Go to https://quince.com/dateable for free shipping and 365 day returns. * Washington Red Raspberries: Check out https://redrazz.org to learn about Washington Red Raspberris and get recipes and more!Support this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/dateable-your-insiders-look-into-modern-dating-and-relationships/donationsAdvertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Aug 5, 2025 • 1h 13min
The Surprising Things That Seduce Us Away From Authentic Relationships w/ Ken Page
What if when dating there are certain things getting in your way that are tempting in ways you may not expect? We're talking with our dear friend psychotherapist Ken Page about how our current dating culture sets people up to fail - and what to do about it. We're talking about the 5 dating archetypes, how to avoid the validation trap when dating, and the most important lessons to apply to your dating life today. Follow Ken @deeperdating, listen to Deeper Dating Podcast, and learn more about Ken here: https://deeperdatingpodcast.com/Get OUR BOOK + take the Dating Archetypes quiz: https://howtobedateable.com/Follow us @dateablepodcast, @juliekrafchick and @nonplatonic. Check out our website for more content. Also listen to our other podcast Exit Interview available on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you get your podcasts.WE WROTE A BOOK! HOW TO BE DATEABLE (Simon & Schuster, Jan 2025) is available now: https://howtobedateable.com/
A big thank you to our sponsor Saily by NordVPN: "🌎 Get an exclusive 15% discount on your first Saily data plans! Use code DATEABLE at checkout. Download Saily app or go to to https://saily.com/dateable ⛵"Our Sponsors:* Mint Mobile: Get 3-months of Unlimited premium wireless service for 15 bucks a month. Upfront payment of $45 required (equivalent to $15/mo.). Limited time new customer offer for first 3 months only. Speeds may slow above 35GB on Unlimited plan. Taxes & fees extra. See MINT MOBILE for details and visit https://mintmobile.com/DATEABLE* Quince: Go to https://quince.com/dateable for free shipping and 365 day returns. * Washington Red Raspberries: Check out https://redrazz.org to learn about Washington Red Raspberris and get recipes and more!Support this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/dateable-your-insiders-look-into-modern-dating-and-relationships/donationsAdvertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Aug 3, 2025 • 16min
#brunchtalk: What To Do When They Won't Commit
So you met someone awesome...but...they aren't ready to define the relationship or stop seeing other people. Do you wait? Date other people? Hold back sex or other intimacy? We're diving into how to handle one of the biggest challenges in dating – when one person is ready to have a relationship and the other isn't quite there We're discussing why it's essential take what people say at face value when dating, how to move forward with clarity and purpose, and ways to prioritize your needs so you don't settle.Got a dating question you need answered? Hit us up at hello@dateablepodcast.comGet OUR BOOK + take the Dating Archetypes quiz: https://howtobedateable.com/Follow us @dateablepodcast, @juliekrafchick and @nonplatonic. Check out our website for more content about modern dating. Also listen to our other podcast Exit Interview available on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you get your podcasts.WE WROTE A BOOK! HOW TO BE DATEABLE (Simon & Schuster, Jan 2025) is available now: https://howtobedateable.com/
A big thank you to our sponsor Saily by NordVPN: "🌎 Get an exclusive 15% discount on your first Saily data plans! Use code DATEABLE at checkout. Download Saily app or go to to https://saily.com/dateable ⛵"Our Sponsors:* Mint Mobile: Get 3-months of Unlimited premium wireless service for 15 bucks a month. Upfront payment of $45 required (equivalent to $15/mo.). Limited time new customer offer for first 3 months only. Speeds may slow above 35GB on Unlimited plan. Taxes & fees extra. See MINT MOBILE for details and visit https://mintmobile.com/DATEABLE* Quince: Go to https://quince.com/dateable for free shipping and 365 day returns. * Washington Red Raspberries: Check out https://redrazz.org to learn about Washington Red Raspberris and get recipes and more!Support this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/dateable-your-insiders-look-into-modern-dating-and-relationships/donationsAdvertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Jul 29, 2025 • 1h 1min
Finding Love After Heartbreak w/ Heather McG
If you're in the thick of heartbreak (or have been before) know that there is hope! Yes, you absolutely can come back stronger after this period of grief – even if it doesn't feel like it right now. We're sharing an interview we did with Heather McG about our personal stories of heartbreak and the lessons learned from past relationships. Join us as we chat about what to do when we feel stuck from one too many negative experiences, how to confront heartbreak in a way that leads to personal development, and why every ending leads to a better, new beginning. Follow, subscribe, and listen to 'Happily Never After' on Substack: https://thehappilyneverafter.substack.com/aGet OUR BOOK + take the Dating Archetypes quiz: https://howtobedateable.com/Follow us @dateablepodcast, @juliekrafchick and @nonplatonic. Check out our website for more content. Also listen to our other podcast Exit Interview available on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you get your podcasts.WE WROTE A BOOK! HOW TO BE DATEABLE (Simon & Schuster, Jan 2025) is available now: https://howtobedateable.com/
A big thank you to our sponsor Saily by NordVPN: "🌎 Get an exclusive 15% discount on your first Saily data plans! Use code DATEABLE at checkout. Download Saily app or go to to https://saily.com/dateable ⛵"Our Sponsors:* Mint Mobile: Get 3-months of Unlimited premium wireless service for 15 bucks a month. Upfront payment of $45 required (equivalent to $15/mo.). Limited time new customer offer for first 3 months only. Speeds may slow above 35GB on Unlimited plan. Taxes & fees extra. See MINT MOBILE for details and visit https://mintmobile.com/DATEABLE* Quince: Go to https://quince.com/dateable for free shipping and 365 day returns. * Washington Red Raspberries: Check out https://redrazz.org to learn about Washington Red Raspberris and get recipes and more!Support this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/dateable-your-insiders-look-into-modern-dating-and-relationships/donationsAdvertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Jul 28, 2025 • 15min
#brunchtalk: The Difference of First Dates in Your 30s
Dating should be fun! But it also should be intentional....especially if you're looking for a life partner. With all these conflicting messages, it's hard to know the expectation of a first date anymore....especially when you reach your 30s and people are looking for something more serious. We're breaking down the difference between self-imposed pressure and the organic evolution when dating, how to balance fun and deep conversations, and ways to make your intentions more known to be seen as a serious prospect – even if you want to keep the first couple dates relatively chill.Got a dating question you need answered? Hit us up at hello@dateablepodcast.comGet OUR BOOK + take the Dating Archetypes quiz: https://howtobedateable.com/Follow us @dateablepodcast, @juliekrafchick and @nonplatonic. Check out our website for more content about modern dating. Also listen to our other podcast Exit Interview available on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you get your podcasts.WE WROTE A BOOK! HOW TO BE DATEABLE (Simon & Schuster, Jan 2025) is available now: https://howtobedateable.com/
A big thank you to our sponsor Saily by NordVPN: "🌎 Get an exclusive 15% discount on your first Saily data plans! Use code DATEABLE at checkout. Download Saily app or go to to https://saily.com/dateable ⛵"Our Sponsors:* Mint Mobile: Get 3-months of Unlimited premium wireless service for 15 bucks a month. Upfront payment of $45 required (equivalent to $15/mo.). Limited time new customer offer for first 3 months only. Speeds may slow above 35GB on Unlimited plan. Taxes & fees extra. See MINT MOBILE for details and visit https://mintmobile.com/DATEABLE* Quince: Go to https://quince.com/dateable for free shipping and 365 day returns. * Washington Red Raspberries: Check out https://redrazz.org to learn about Washington Red Raspberris and get recipes and more!Support this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/dateable-your-insiders-look-into-modern-dating-and-relationships/donationsAdvertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy