Sex and Psychology Podcast

Dr. Justin Lehmiller
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Jul 22, 2025 • 37min

Episode 416: How ADHD Affects Women In The Bedroom

How does ADHD affect women’s sexual and romantic relationships? In this episode, we’ll explore some of the most common issues that come up in the bedroom for women with ADHD, the problem with only relying on medication to help, as well as what women with ADHD and their partners need to know about cultivating supportive environments that are more conducive to pleasure. I am joined by Dr. Leann Borneman, a licensed clinical social worker, AASECT certified sex therapist, professor, and clinical sexology researcher. She specializes in the intersection of ADHD, relationships, and sexuality. Leann runs the podcast ADHD Realities and is currently writing a book on ADHD and low sexual desire. Some of the specific topics we explore include: How common is it for women to have ADHD? Why is ADHD typically diagnosed so much later in women than men? What are the most common sex problems that women with ADHD experience? What is “executive dysfunction” and how does it contribute to low desire? What are some ways women with ADHD can approach sex so that it works with their brains, and not against them? You can check out Leann’s website to learn more about her. Got a sex question? Send me a podcast voicemail to have it answered on a future episode at speakpipe.com/sexandpsychology. *** Thank you to our sponsors!  Expand your sexual horizons with Beducated! Featuring more than 100 online courses taught by the experts, Beducated brings pleasure-based sex ed directly into your bedroom. Enjoy a free trial today and get 50% off their yearly pass by using LEHMILLER as the coupon code. To redeem this offer, visit: https://beducate.me/july-justin Passionate about building a career in sexuality? Check out the Sexual Health Alliance. With SHA, you’ll connect with world-class experts and join an engaged community of sexuality professionals from around the world. Visit SexualHealthAlliance.com and start building the sexuality career of your dreams today. Practice love every day with Paired, the #1 app for couples. Download the app at paired.com/justin to get a 7-day free trial and 25% off if you sign up for a subscription. *** Want to learn more about Sex and Psychology? Click here for previous articles or follow the blog on Facebook, Twitter, or Bluesky to receive updates. You can also follow Dr. Lehmiller on YouTube and Instagram. Listen and stream all episodes on Apple, Spotify, Google, or Amazon. Subscribe to automatically receive new episodes and please rate and review the podcast! Credits: Precision Podcasting (Podcast editing) and Shutterstock/Florian (Music). Image created with Canva; photos used with permission of guest.
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Jul 18, 2025 • 48min

Episode 415: The Science Of Dick Pics

Let’s talk about dick pics. A lot of guys send these without even asking. In today’s show, we’re going to dive into the data and explore how many men have ever sent an unsolicited dick pic and why, how these photos are perceived by recipients, as well as what you need to know about sexting if you really want to connect with someone. My guests today are Dr. Cory Pederson and Amanda Champion. Cory is the Lab Director and Principal Investigator of the ORGASM Lab. She also teaches human sexuality courses at Kwantlen Polytechnic University (KPU). Amanda is a doctoral student in the school of criminology at Simon Fraser University and a faculty member in the Department of Psychology at KPU. Cory and Amanda have studied the science of dick pics and are going to be discussing the details of a new study they completed in collaboration with MANSCAPED®. Some of the specific topics we explore include: How many people have ever received an unsolicited dick pic? What kind of reaction are people who send unsolicited dick pics hoping for? What platforms are men typically sending these photos on? How often are these photos perceived positively versus negatively? If you’re thinking about sending a dick pic to someone, what do you need to know? You can check out the work of the ORGASM Lab on their website. Got a sex question? Send me a podcast voicemail to have it answered on a future episode at speakpipe.com/sexandpsychology. *** Want to learn more about Sex and Psychology? Click here for previous articles or follow the blog on Facebook, Twitter, or Bluesky to receive updates. You can also follow Dr. Lehmiller on YouTube and Instagram. Listen and stream all episodes on Apple, Spotify, Google, or Amazon. Subscribe to automatically receive new episodes and please rate and review the podcast! Credits: Precision Podcasting (Podcast editing) and Shutterstock/Florian (Music). Image created with Canva; photos used with permission of guest.
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Jul 15, 2025 • 39min

Episode 414: The Truth About Porn (Essential Listen)

The view that porn is inherently harmful seems to be growing. Porn is increasingly described as “addictive” and as a threat to public health. But is this actually true? In today’s show, we’re revisiting an important conversation from the archives in which we explore the truth about how porn affects people. My guest is Dr. Nicole Prause, a licensed psychologist and sex researcher who founded the sexual biotechnology company Liberos. She is a former Kinsey Institute trainee and has published an extensive body of research on the neuroscience and psychophysiology of sex. She is currently a scientist at the University of California, Los Angeles in the Department of Medicine. Some of the specific questions we explore in this episode include: What counts as porn? And how do you measure porn use on surveys when different people have different definitions of it? Why are there so many discrepant findings about pornography’s effects in the research? Why shouldn’t we think of porn as addictive? How should we think about it instead? When people identify porn as a problem in their lives, is porn per se really the issue or is there usually something else going on? In what ways can porn potentially have positive effects on people? Learn more about Nicole by following her at @NicoleRPrause over on X and or Bluesky. Got a sex question? Send me a podcast voicemail to have it answered on a future episode at speakpipe.com/sexandpsychology. *** Thank you to our sponsors!  Boost your sexual confidence and performance with Popstar Delay Spray. Save 20% off your first order by using “Justin” as the discount code at popstarlabs.com/justin.  I’m excited to announce a new online course I’m teaching on the topic of fantasies at the Kinsey Institute. Be sure to register for “The New Science of Sexual Fantasies” workshop, which will take place on July 19th, 2025. *** Want to learn more about Sex and Psychology? Click here for previous articles or follow the blog on Facebook, Twitter, or Bluesky to receive updates. You can also follow Dr. Lehmiller on YouTube and Instagram. Listen and stream all episodes on Apple, Spotify, Google, or Amazon. Subscribe to automatically receive new episodes and please rate and review the podcast! Credits: Precision Podcasting (Podcast editing) and Shutterstock/Florian (Music). Image created with Canva; photos used with permission of guest.
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Jul 11, 2025 • 31min

Episode 413: A Cultural History Of Kink

In the previous episode, we began a fascinating conversation about the long history of human interest in kink and BDSM. Today, we’re diving deeper into the subject and discussing how major cultural events have played a role in shaping kinky interests. We’re also going to talk about how kink and BDSM have been portrayed in the media and some of the controversies around how it has been presented. I am joined once again by author, historian, and journalist Peter Tupper. He runs the History of BDSM blog and wrote the book A Lover’s Pinch: A Cultural History of Sadomasochism. Some of the specific topics we explore include: How did WWII influence BDSM practices and communities? What’s the historical connection between BDSM and fascist politics? How are kink and BDSM represented in popular media? How do we balance making representations of minority sexualities accessible without over-relying on stereotypes? You can check out Peter’s book here. Got a sex question? Send me a podcast voicemail to have it answered on a future episode at speakpipe.com/sexandpsychology. *** Thank you to our sponsors!  Boost your sexual confidence and performance with Popstar Delay Spray. Save 20% off your first order by using “Justin” as the discount code at popstarlabs.com/justin.  I’m excited to announce a new online course I’m teaching on the topic of fantasies at the Kinsey Institute. Be sure to register for “The New Science of Sexual Fantasies” workshop, which will take place on July 19th, 2025. *** Want to learn more about Sex and Psychology? Click here for previous articles or follow the blog on Facebook, Twitter, or Bluesky to receive updates. You can also follow Dr. Lehmiller on YouTube and Instagram. Listen and stream all episodes on Apple, Spotify, Google, or Amazon. Subscribe to automatically receive new episodes and please rate and review the podcast! Credits: Precision Podcasting (Podcast editing) and Shutterstock/Florian (Music). Image created with Canva; photos used with permission of guest.
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Jul 8, 2025 • 35min

Episode 412: When Did People Start Practicing Kink And BDSM?

Ever since Fifty Shades of Grey hit the scene, it seems as though kink and BDSM have become ubiquitous in popular media. But here’s the thing: just because kink went mainstream in the last decade or so doesn’t mean that it’s new. In fact, the roots of BDSM trace back centuries. And the history behind it is fascinating, so that’s what we’re going to be talking about today. I am joined by author, historian, and journalist Peter Tupper. He runs the History of BDSM blog and wrote the book A Lover’s Pinch: A Cultural History of Sadomasochism. Some of the specific topics we explore include: How far back in human history does interest in BDSM go? When we look back through history, how do we know whether something actually reflects BDSM as we know it today? What is the role of religion in the history of BDSM? Where did the term “sadomasochism” come from? How have views on BDSM changed over time? You can check out Peter’s book here. Got a sex question? Send me a podcast voicemail to have it answered on a future episode at speakpipe.com/sexandpsychology. *** Thank you to our sponsors!  Expand your sexual horizons with Beducated! Featuring more than 100 online courses taught by the experts, Beducated brings pleasure-based sex ed directly into your bedroom. Enjoy a free trial today and get 50% off their yearly pass by using LEHMILLER as the coupon code. To redeem this offer, visit: https://beducate.me/july-justin Passionate about building a career in sexuality? Check out the Sexual Health Alliance. With SHA, you’ll connect with world-class experts and join an engaged community of sexuality professionals from around the world. Visit SexualHealthAlliance.com and start building the sexuality career of your dreams today. *** Want to learn more about Sex and Psychology? Click here for previous articles or follow the blog on Facebook, Twitter, or Bluesky to receive updates. You can also follow Dr. Lehmiller on YouTube and Instagram. Listen and stream all episodes on Apple, Spotify, Google, or Amazon. Subscribe to automatically receive new episodes and please rate and review the podcast! Credits: Precision Podcasting (Podcast editing) and Shutterstock/Florian (Music). Image created with Canva; photos used with permission of guest.
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Jul 4, 2025 • 39min

Episode 411: Debunking Myths About Men’s Sexuality (Essential Listen)

Men’s sexuality is often described as being pretty simple. Sex is seen as being easy for guys because they’re always in the mood and sex is just a physical thing for them. The reality of male sexuality, however, is far more complicated, and we’re not doing anyone any favors by oversimplifying it. So in this episode, we’re going to dive into common myths about male sexuality. In today’s show, we’re revisiting one of my favorite conversations from the archives, my interview with Cam Fraser which originally aired in episode 255.  Cam is a Certified Professional Sex Coach, Certified Sexologist, Registered Counselor, and Registered Tantric Yoga Teacher. Some of the topics we explore in this episode include: Where did this idea that men are “simple” and women are “complex” when it comes to sex come from? How do attractiveness standards affect men when it comes to sex, dating, and relationships? What do men who are anxious about their penis size need to know? Are men always supposed to be aroused and ready for sex? To what degree is sex emotional vs. physical for men? You can check out Cam’s website to learn more about his work. Got a sex question? Send me a podcast voicemail to have it answered on a future episode at speakpipe.com/sexandpsychology. *** Thank you to our sponsors!  Boost your sexual confidence and performance with Popstar Delay Spray. Save 20% off your first order by using “Justin” as the discount code at popstarlabs.com/justin.  I’m excited to announce a new online course I’m teaching on the topic of fantasies at the Kinsey Institute. Be sure to register for “The New Science of Sexual Fantasies” workshop, which will take place on July 19th, 2025. *** Want to learn more about Sex and Psychology? Click here for previous articles or follow the blog on Facebook, Twitter, or Bluesky to receive updates. You can also follow Dr. Lehmiller on YouTube and Instagram. Listen and stream all episodes on Apple, Spotify, Google, or Amazon. Subscribe to automatically receive new episodes and please rate and review the podcast! Credits: Precision Podcasting (Podcast editing) and Shutterstock/Florian (Music). Image created with Canva; photos used with permission of guest.
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Jul 1, 2025 • 40min

Episode 410: Is Porn Use A Problem In Your Relationship?

One in five couples report that porn has become a problem in their relationship. So why is porn such a common source of conflict, and what can we do about it? In today’s show, we’re going to explore how many people in relationships use porn, what fights about porn are really about, as well as how to resolve issues with porn in relationships. I am joined once again by Ashley Weller. She is a Human Sexuality and Health Psychology Professor at Chapman University in Southern California. She also has a podcast called What’s your Position which tackles issues surrounding sexuality, relationships, life, and love from a comedic yet educational point of view. Some of the specific topics we explore include: Why do so many couples fight about porn? Are fights about porn a symptom of a deeper issue? Why is porn mostly an issue heterosexual, monogamous relationships but not so much in queer and non-monogamous relationships? How can we use porn in healthy ways in relationships? How can you have more productive conversations about porn with your partner? You can learn more about Ashley and check out What’s your Position here. Got a sex question? Send me a podcast voicemail to have it answered on a future episode at speakpipe.com/sexandpsychology. *** Thank you to our sponsors!  Expand your sexual horizons with Beducated! Featuring more than 100 online courses taught by the experts, Beducated brings pleasure-based sex ed directly into your bedroom. Enjoy a free trial today and get 50% off their yearly pass by using LEHMILLER as the coupon code. To redeem this offer, visit: https://beducate.me/july-justin Passionate about building a career in sexuality? Check out the Sexual Health Alliance. With SHA, you’ll connect with world-class experts and join an engaged community of sexuality professionals from around the world. Visit SexualHealthAlliance.com and start building the sexuality career of your dreams today. *** Want to learn more about Sex and Psychology? Click here for previous articles or follow the blog on Facebook, Twitter, or Bluesky to receive updates. You can also follow Dr. Lehmiller on YouTube and Instagram. Listen and stream all episodes on Apple, Spotify, Google, or Amazon. Subscribe to automatically receive new episodes and please rate and review the podcast! Credits: Precision Podcasting (Podcast editing) and Shutterstock/Florian (Music). Image created with Canva; photos used with permission of guest.
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Jun 27, 2025 • 41min

Episode 409: Does “Body Count” Really Matter?

How many people have you had sex with? In other words, what’s your “body count?” In this episode, we’re going to dive into the data. We’ll discuss the average number of sexual partners people report having, why men consistently report higher body counts than women, as well as why people seem to place so much emphasis on body count in the first place. I am joined by Ashley Weller. She is a Human Sexuality and Health Psychology Professor at Chapman University in Southern California. She also has a podcast called What’s your Position that tackles issues surrounding sexuality, relationships, life, and love from a comedic yet educational point of view. Some of the specific topics we explore include: Is there a better phrase than “body count” that we can use when referring to the number of partners we’ve had? What’s the average body count among adults today, and how has it changed over time? How does body count differ across gender? What are people really asking when they inquire about body count? Does body count actually tell you anything about someone else’s sexual health or competence? You can follow Ashley and check out What’s your Position here. Got a sex question? Send me a podcast voicemail to have it answered on a future episode at speakpipe.com/sexandpsychology. *** Thank you to our sponsors!  Expand your sexual horizons with Beducated! Featuring more than 100 online courses taught by the experts, Beducated brings pleasure-based sex ed directly into your bedroom. Enjoy a free trial today and get 50% off their yearly pass by using LEHMILLER as the coupon code. To redeem this offer, visit: https://beducate.me/lehmiller-june  Passionate about building a career in sexuality? Check out the Sexual Health Alliance. With SHA, you’ll connect with world-class experts and join an engaged community of sexuality professionals from around the world. Visit SexualHealthAlliance.com and start building the sexuality career of your dreams today. Practice love every day with Paired, the #1 app for couples. Download the app at paired.com/justin to get a 7-day free trial and 25% off if you sign up for a subscription. *** Want to learn more about Sex and Psychology? Click here for previous articles or follow the blog on Facebook, Twitter, or Bluesky to receive updates. You can also follow Dr. Lehmiller on YouTube and Instagram. Listen and stream all episodes on Apple, Spotify, Google, or Amazon. Subscribe to automatically receive new episodes and please rate and review the podcast! Credits: Precision Podcasting (Podcast editing) and Shutterstock/Florian (Music). Image created with Canva; photos used with permission of guest.
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Jun 24, 2025 • 39min

Episode 408: Do Nice Guys Really Finish Last?

In this engaging discussion, Caitlin V, a well-known sex and relationship coach with millions of YouTube views, tackles the age-old question of whether nice guys truly finish last. She explains how being overly agreeable can diminish attractiveness and emphasizes the importance of blending confidence with kindness. Topics range from the complexities of the 'nice guy' archetype to navigating sexual desires and boundaries. Caitlin also shares insights on enhancing intimacy and communication in relationships, advocating for authenticity in expressing needs.
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6 snips
Jun 20, 2025 • 46min

Episode 407: How Men Can Become Better Lovers

Join Caitlin V, a renowned sex and relationship coach with a massive online following, as she provides actionable tips for men to enhance their skills as lovers. Discover how to build sexual confidence, shift focus from performance to pleasure, and why changing your masturbation habits can lead to better partnered experiences. Caitlin also emphasizes the art of communication and understanding desires for deeper intimacy. Learn the importance of vulnerability in confidence-building and practical techniques to master the art of touch.

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