

Stronger Marriage Connection
Utah Marriage Comission
It's often said that marriage takes work. The Stronger Marriage Connection podcast wants to help because a happy marriage is worth the effort. USU Family Life Professor Dr. Dave Schramm and Clinical Psychologist Dr. Liz Hale talk with experts about the principles and practices that will enhance your commitment, compassion, and emotional connection. More than ever before, marriages face obstacles, from the busyness of work and daily hassles to disagreements and digital distractions. It's no wonder couples sometimes drift apart, growing resentful, lonely, and isolated.The Utah Marriage Commission invites you to listen and discover new ways to strengthen and protect your marriage connection today!
Episodes
Mentioned books

Jan 8, 2024 • 37min
Sexual Mindfulness | Dr. Chelom Leavitt | #67
On today’s episode of the stronger marriage connection, Dr. Chelom Leavitt, J.D., Ph.D., will explore with Dr. Dave and Dr. Liz how to intentionally slow your mind and body to build awareness and create better connection during sex.About Chelom Leavitt:Dr. Chelom Leavitt, J.D., Ph.D. teaches in the School of Family Life at Brigham Young University. Dr. Leavitt received her Ph.D. from Penn State where she focused her research on how mindfulness is linked to sexual functioning and satisfaction. Dr. Leavitt’s findings have been published in top research journals and books. Her research has helped uncover what couples experience during sex, and what factors contribute to connection. Along with her work in Sexual Mindfulness, Dr. Leavitt hosts interventions that teach couples how to slow down and be more aware and create greater connection during sex. She regularly blogs for Psychology Today as well her website www.chelomleavitt.com, where she shares with readers the latest research on meaningful sex, slowing down to experience greater connection, and being more curious in romantic and sexual relationships. Dr. Chelom Leavitt is married to David Leavitt and they are the parents of nine children.Insights: Chelom: Slow down, be gentle and be curious.Dave: Media does not portray sex correctly, making time to breathe, slow down, and raise awareness will benefit your relationship in all ways.Liz: Normalizing emotions in our life and bringing awareness can increase our sexual pleasure and lives.Invites: •Practice the mindful embrace and heads together exercise Chelom discussed with your partner.Start mindfulness exercises. The next time you have 2 minutes of breathing room, sit down, practice how it feels to just breathe and be. Implement this routine more and more into your schedule.Notice what happens when you are physically connecting with your partner. A hug can tell you a lot about how your relationship looks and what you and your partner need.Chelom Leavitt Links: Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/sexualmindfulnessproject/https://www.chelomleavitt.com/ Visit our site for FREE relationship resources and regular giveaways:StrongerMarriage.orgVisit our site for FREE relationship resources and regular giveaways: Strongermarriage.org Podcast.stongermarriage.org YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@StrongerMarriageLife TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@strongermarriagelife Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/strongermarriagelife/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/strongermarriage/ Facebook Marriage Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/770019130329579 Dr. Dave Schramm: http://drdaveschramm.com http://drdavespeaks.com Dr. Liz Hale: http://www.drlizhale.com/

Jan 1, 2024 • 42min
Overcoming Sexual Frustration | Tammy Hill | #66
On today’s episode of the stronger marriage connection, Dave and Liz with TammyHill, educator, LMFT, ASSECT, and author discuss how to overcome rejection, desire difference,and stale sex. Explore new ways to replenish your partner and build beauty in your sexualconnection.About Tammy Hill:Tammy Hill is passionate about strengthening marriage relationships. She is a LicensedMarriage and Family Therapist and an active member of the American Association of SexualEducators, Counselors and Therapists (ASSECT). Tammy enjoys being an adjunct facultymember at Brigham Young University in the School of Family Life where she teaches hundredsof students each semester in Marriage Preparation, Marriage Enhancement and HealthySexuality in Marriage courses. Tammy owns a private counseling practice where she largelyworks with couples. She has free resources available on her website(http://www.tammyhill.com) where she also offers numerous Making Love Retreats,Honeymoon Workshops and Dating Bootcamps each year. Published in 2021, Tammy’s firstbook, “God Made Girls and Boys” is a beautiful children’s book addressing agency, gender,accountability, and hope in our Heavenly Parent’s eternal plan. Her second book, “Replenish:Creating Sexual Fulfillment in Marriage”, was published earlier this year. Most importantlyTammy is forever grateful to be a wife, mother and grandmother.Insights:Tammy: Humans are created with a capacity to have amazing sexual pleasure. Push yourself tolearn how to replenish each other.Dave: Make time to intentionally have sex with your partner.Liz: Monogamous does not have to mean monotonous.Invites:Instead of waiting for your partner to change, recognize the part you play inconflict and seek to change it without any guarantee that your partner will do thesame. You may find that your partner’s response to your change is exactly what youhoped.Examine whether there is contempt in your relationship. If you “horibilize” yourpartner by objectifying them and only seeing their faults and their weaknesses, youmight be guilty of contempt.As yourself, “ If I were to give my whole heart to my partner, what would it occurto me to do?”. Be still and then heed that inner call to connectTammy Hill Links:Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/tammy_hill_lmft/Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/groups/replenishyourmarriagePodcast: Visit our site for FREE relationship resources and regular giveaways: Strongermarriage.org Podcast.stongermarriage.org YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@StrongerMarriageLife TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@strongermarriagelife Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/strongermarriagelife/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/strongermarriage/ Facebook Marriage Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/770019130329579 Dr. Dave Schramm: http://drdaveschramm.com http://drdavespeaks.com Dr. Liz Hale: http://www.drlizhale.com/

Dec 25, 2023 • 34min
Christmas Memories & Traditions | Dave & Liz | #65
Happy Holidays and Merry Christmas. Today, Liz, Dave, and Rex share family traditions, memories of celebrations past, and relationship insights.December is a time of celebration for many that include cultural traditions. The holidays can be many things for many people: great joy, chaos, solemn reflection or new beginnings. Join us as we discuss Christmas memories, traditions, and share some tips to help you navigate your relationship during the holidays. Visit our site for FREE relationship resources and regular giveaways:StrongerMarriage.orgpodcast.strongermarriage.orgFacebook: StrongerMarriage.orgInstagram: @strongermarriagelifeDr. Dave Schramm:https://drdaveschramm.comhttps://drdavespeaks.comFacebook: https://www.facebook.com/DrDaveUSUFacebook Marriage Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/770019130329579Facebook Parenting Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/542067440314642Dr. Liz Hale:http://www.drlizhale.com/ Visit our site for FREE relationship resources and regular giveaways: Strongermarriage.org Podcast.stongermarriage.org YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@StrongerMarriageLife TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@strongermarriagelife Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/strongermarriagelife/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/strongermarriage/ Facebook Marriage Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/770019130329579 Dr. Dave Schramm: http://drdaveschramm.com http://drdavespeaks.com Dr. Liz Hale: http://www.drlizhale.com/

Dec 18, 2023 • 35min
Tips For Managing In-laws & Family Gatherings | Dave & Liz | #64
Rex joins Dave and Liz today to discuss tips for managing In-laws and family gatherings.Relationships with extended family can be tricky or sometimes difficult and anxiety inducing. Dr. John Gottman says, "Every marriage is a cross-cultural experience." Whether we come from similar cultures or not, together we create a brand new culture within our new families. The holidays bring opportunities to spend time with our extended family. Though these gatherings can bring many emotions to the service, here are four tips to help settle in and make the best of the time for you and them.Speak Kindly: Speak kindly to your partner about their family and friends. Share concerns or issues with a compassion mindfulness and heart.Get Curious: When you bring an open curiosity to your family gatherings, you can learn things about your extended family, your spouse, and yourself. Being curious also creates the opportunity for bids for connection and leads to relationship building. People love to share stories, likes, and things about themselves. So take a moment to get curious about your extended family and treasure the experience.Lean In: Leaning in creates situations where everyone can be included and participate in a comfortable way. It's a good idea to prepare at least one activity, topic, or item to bring to the gathering that will get everyone wanting to contribute or participate. This could be a simple game, social activity, food or recipe or possibly even a toy of some sort. When the moment arrives, rise to the occasion and lean in.Plan Your Exit: Sometimes we can only contain so much joy at family gathering before problems may arise. Have an exit plan or strategy in place so that you and your spouse can discretely signal each other that you have reached your quota or are ready to go. This can be a fun and relationship building exercise for you and your spouse. Rex shares a strategy and code for "I am ready to go" that he and his wife have developed over their marriage.Avoid Contentious Conversation Topics: It's usually best to avoid discussing religion and politics at social gatherings. And if you have a family member that enjoys sharing advice, listen with a curious mind, but be ready to respond politely. Some examples might be, "That is interesting, I will have to think about that." or "That's a good idea, but we're going to do it this way." or "Thanks, but this seems to be working for us right now."Beware of Criticism: We may be able to tease our own family, but when someone else mentions a criticism itVisit our site for FREE relationship resources and regular giveaways: Strongermarriage.org Podcast.stongermarriage.org YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@StrongerMarriageLife TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@strongermarriagelife Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/strongermarriagelife/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/strongermarriage/ Facebook Marriage Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/770019130329579 Dr. Dave Schramm: http://drdaveschramm.com http://drdavespeaks.com Dr. Liz Hale: http://www.drlizhale.com/

Dec 11, 2023 • 39min
A Parents Guide to Answering Kid's Questions About Sex | Stacy Goulding | #63
Stacy Goulding joins Dr. Dave Schramm to discuss how she is able to help educate youth about reproductive health. She also shares some tips for couples to have positive intimate relationships.About Stacy Goulding:Stacy is a licensed health educator that has spent the last decade teaching at-risk youth aboutreproductive health. She's passionate about preparing couples for a positive intimaterelationship in their marriage. She believes everyone deserves comprehensive research basedinformation about how the body works. Thus her true intimacy class was created. She'scurrently developing a class for parents to teach kids of all ages about healthy sexuality. She also was a wellness coach specializing in women and postpartum wellness. In addition to teaching Stacy loves cycling, dancing, kayaking, pickleball and classic rock. She resides in Utah with her husband and two sons.Insights:“And it's really simple. And you can also approach it from, ‘where do babies come from,’ andyou start small and grow with your kids' development.” -Stacy Goulding“I think overall being authentic is really important. It's okay to tell your kid I've never given a sex talk before where I wasn't given the sex talk before or I'm feeling nervous, because this is my first time or I don't want to say it wrong. But you can say those things. And just say, but this is so important, I think it is worth going through the awkward or the uncomfortable to discuss this.” -Stacy Goulding"It's not like "Don't do it, it's bad!". It's like "No, sex is amazing when there are proper boundaries and values in place." Especially with teens right now, they want to know "why?". There are not just listening to Mom & Dad said so, they don't care. So giving them the "why?" really matters. "Hey I want you to have this in the future. Let's get there through this healthier and safer path." -Stacy GouldingInvites:Look at the courses that Stacy has to offer on her website.If you have children, start today by talking positively about their bodies and the waysthat you show affection with your partner.Learn about consent and how you can implement asking for consent in your relationshipor marriage.Stacy's Links:https://stacylyncoaching.com/instagram: @stacylyn_coaching Visit our site for FREE relationship resources and regular giveaways:Visit our site for FREE relationship resources and regular giveaways: Strongermarriage.org Podcast.stongermarriage.org YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@StrongerMarriageLife TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@strongermarriagelife Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/strongermarriagelife/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/strongermarriage/ Facebook Marriage Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/770019130329579 Dr. Dave Schramm: http://drdaveschramm.com http://drdavespeaks.com Dr. Liz Hale: http://www.drlizhale.com/

Dec 4, 2023 • 41min
Dealing With Changes & Transitions in Marriage & Relationships | Laura Parry | #62
Laura Parry joins Dr. Dave Schramm to discuss tips that help couples to transition toparenthood. Laura shares her insight and experience on how partners can support each otherduring this stressful time.About Laura ParryLaura holds a Master's of Social Work from the University of Utah, and in 2019 became certified in perinatal mental health. In addition to helping clients through the perinatal period, she enjoys working with those experiencing faith transitions. She earned a clinical yoga certification in 2021 and loves using the healing power of yoga, nature and therapy for clients and for herself. She lives in Lehi with her husband, three kids, two cats, and one dog and loves reading, hiking and playing the piano.Insights“I would want people to know that your relationship can not just survive, but you can thrive even if there's been a change and relationship and faith in religion.” - Laura Parry“I also want women to know that this is a vulnerable time for them, it can be a hard time,obviously, it comes with a lot of excitement and joy to hopefully, but that they're allowed to feel the whole range of emotions that come with a transition as big as having a baby.” -Laura ParryInvitesCheck out the resources at rootsbranceswellness.comIf you’re preparing to have a baby, sit down with your partner to talk about the SHRIMPacronym and talk about your expectations for when the baby arrives.Learn more about understanding faith transitions by talking with someone who has gone or is going through one.Laura's Linkshttps://www.rootsbrancheswellness.comInstagram: @_lauraparry Visit our site for FREE relationship resources and regular giveaways:StrongerMarriage.orgpodcast.strongermarriage.orgFacebook: StrongerMarriage.orgInstagram: @strongermarriagelifeDr. Dave Schramm:https://drdaveschramm.comhttps://drdavespeaks.comFacebook: https://www.facebook.com/DrDaveUSUFacebook Marriage Group: Visit our site for FREE relationship resources and regular giveaways: Strongermarriage.org Podcast.stongermarriage.org YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@StrongerMarriageLife TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@strongermarriagelife Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/strongermarriagelife/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/strongermarriage/ Facebook Marriage Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/770019130329579 Dr. Dave Schramm: http://drdaveschramm.com http://drdavespeaks.com Dr. Liz Hale: http://www.drlizhale.com/

Nov 27, 2023 • 42min
Remarriage: Balancing A Blended Family and Sharing A Business | Kevin & Tracey Parr | #61
Kevin and Racy Parr joining Dr. Dave Schramm and Dr. Liz Hale to talk about theirexperience in a blended family and 28 years of marriage.About Kevin & Tracey ParrKevin and Tracy Parr have been married for 28 years and run a business together in St. George,UT. They have 3 kids together with two that struggle with mental health illnesses. They haveyears of experience working through differences and the difficulties of re-marriage. Kevin andTracy have been nicknamed “velcro” because of the way they enjoy doing everything together.Insights“Every now and then we just had to figure that it was okay to completely, totally disagree about something, and table it for a while.” - Kevin Parr 25:57-26:22“I feel that you need to stay connected with your spouse and in all the things that you do.” - Tracy Parr 31:43-32:02“One of the authors we had on recently, Ted Lowe would say this favorite phrase, which I really coined is "I would feel the same way if I were you." Which is probably true, right?” - Dr. Liz Hale 38:33-38:55InvitesFind a new resource; a book, podcast or instagram page that will help you to learn more about what you and your spouse are wanting to work on.In parenting, remember to not take your child’s feeling of sadness or anger as personal attacks against you.Visit our site for FREE relationship resources and regular giveaways:StrongerMarriage.orgpodcast.strongermarriage.orgFacebook: StrongerMarriage.orgInstagram: @strongermarriagelifeDr. Dave Schramm:https://drdaveschramm.comhttps://drdavespeaks.comFacebook: https://www.facebook.com/DrDaveUSUFacebook Marriage Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/770019130329579Facebook Parenting Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/542067440314642Dr. Liz Hale:http://www.drlizhale.com/ Visit our site for FREE relationship resources and regular giveaways: Strongermarriage.org Podcast.stongermarriage.org YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@StrongerMarriageLife TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@strongermarriagelife Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/strongermarriagelife/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/strongermarriage/ Facebook Marriage Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/770019130329579 Dr. Dave Schramm: http://drdaveschramm.com http://drdavespeaks.com Dr. Liz Hale: http://www.drlizhale.com/

Nov 20, 2023 • 26min
Managing Money in Marriage | Ryan Law #2 | #60
Ryan Law joins Dr. Dave Schramm and Dr. Liz Hale to discuss managing money withinstrong marriages. He talks about the importance of assuming the best and the 5 Money Habitsto financial success.About Ryan Law:Ryan Law is the Director of the Utah Valley University (UVU) Money Success Center. He is anaward-winning educator who teaches the Financial Counseling courses as part of the PersonalFinancial Planning program at UVU. Ryan is a Certified Financial Planner™ professional (CFP®)and an Accredited Financial Counselor (AFC®). Ryan is the author of the books, “Student LoanPlanning,” “Make Positive Changes” and co-editor of the book “Financial Counseling.” Ryan and his wife, Traci, have been married for 24 years and they live in Utah county with their 5 children.Insights:“I would encourage couples to do two things. First, to not assume bad intent on your spouse's part. And second, to wait until you have all of the facts.” - Ryan Law“Those who give and find a way to give in a way that they both agree to are healthier, happier, and even richer.” -Dr. Liz Hale“Nobody wins really, as soon as it erupts and it becomes emotional when you get defensive and name calling everything you had just doesn't just does not go well” -Dr. Dave SchrammInvites:Think of an experience when you had wrong assumptions about the way that they spentmoney and think about what you could do differently next time to assume the best.Join Ryan Law’s email list to learn about more tips that will help you to master the money side of your marriageRyan’s Links:https://money-marriage.com/https://powerpay.orgVisit our site for FREE relationship resources and regular giveaways:StrongerMarriage.orgpodcast.strongermarriage.orgFacebook: StrongerMarriage.orgInstagram: @strongermarriagelifeDr. Dave Schramm:https://drdaveschramm.comhttps://drdavespeaks.comFacebook: https://www.facebook.com/DrDaveUSUFacebook Marriage Group: Visit our site for FREE relationship resources and regular giveaways: Strongermarriage.org Podcast.stongermarriage.org YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@StrongerMarriageLife TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@strongermarriagelife Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/strongermarriagelife/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/strongermarriage/ Facebook Marriage Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/770019130329579 Dr. Dave Schramm: http://drdaveschramm.com http://drdavespeaks.com Dr. Liz Hale: http://www.drlizhale.com/

Nov 13, 2023 • 58min
Breaking Free Together: Overcoming Addiction in Marriage | Kris & Adrian | #59
Kris and Adrian Maiava join Dr. Dave Schramm and Dr. Liz Hale to talk about theirexperience in meeting with Dr. Liz Hale. They talk about their experience in coming togetherthrough therapy and overcoming addiction.About Kris and Adrian Maiava:Kris and Adrian met in Utah although they grew up in Hawaii and Australia. They share anincredible story of working through struggles and addictions, separations and learning to loveand trust again. After three years in an intensive treatment program, Kris learned things abouthimself and his marriage that changed his life. And Adrian learned patience and experiencedtremendous growth as she hung on to hope and learned to forgive. Together they have grownstronger than ever and enjoy parenting their 5 year old daughter Lola.Insights:“I guess some questions to ask yourselves as to you know, do you still want to be partners with them, with your significant other? Do you still want to do this with them? If so, if yes. And if they want to as well, then I think it's worth it.” - Kris Maiava“Better choices lead to better chances.” -Dave Schramm“But there was a point in your life where you decided, this is the person that I want to do lifewith. So that should be the person that you offer the most grace to.” -Adrian MaiavaInvites:If you are struggling with addiction, seek outside help.Have a 10 minute discussion with your partner about something that is challenging yourrelationship and find a way to overcome it togetherVisit our site for FREE relationship resources and regular giveaways:StrongerMarriage.orgpodcast.strongermarriage.orgFacebook: StrongerMarriage.orgInstagram: @strongermarriagelifeDr. Dave Schramm:https://drdaveschramm.comhttps://drdavespeaks.comFacebook: https://www.facebook.com/DrDaveUSUFacebook Marriage Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/770019130329579Facebook Parenting Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/542067440314642Dr. Liz Hale:Visit our site for FREE relationship resources and regular giveaways: Strongermarriage.org Podcast.stongermarriage.org YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@StrongerMarriageLife TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@strongermarriagelife Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/strongermarriagelife/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/strongermarriage/ Facebook Marriage Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/770019130329579 Dr. Dave Schramm: http://drdaveschramm.com http://drdavespeaks.com Dr. Liz Hale: http://www.drlizhale.com/

Nov 6, 2023 • 31min
Parenting With Purpose: Family Life Coaching for a Brighter Future | Dr. Kim Allen | #58
Dr. Kim Allen joins Dr. Dave Schramm and Dr. Liz Hale to talk about Family Life Coaching.She talks about what it is, what it isn't, and even a few examples and stories of clients she'sworked with.About Kim Allen:Dr. Kimberly Allen is Interim Associate Dean and Director of Academic Programs and Professor in the College of Agriculture and Life Sciences at North Carolina State University, as well as CO creator of the family life coaching Association, and co-owner of Sweet Gestalt LLC. Dr. Ellen has over 20 years experience working with youth and their families. Her research interests include family life coaching, student success, parenting and relationship Education. Dr. Ellen is author of the book “Theory, Research and Practical Guidelines for Family Life Coaching.”Insights:“So really at its core family life coaching is taking what we know in Family Science about what's good in couple relationships, what's good and family relationships and partnering that with the process from coaching psychology.” - Dr. Kimberly Allen“You said the words listening for instead of listening to. You listen for feelings, you're listeningfor strengths, and just trying to see things from their perspective” - Dr. Dave SchrammInvites:Learn more about Family Life Coaching on the FLC Association’s website.Consider reaching out to a Family Life Coach to help you to improve your interpersonalrelationships.Kim Allen’s Links:Organization Website: flcassociation.orgPersonal Website: drkimallen.com Visit our site for FREE relationship resources and regular giveaways:StrongerMarriage.orgpodcast.strongermarriage.orgFacebook: StrongerMarriage.orgInstagram: @strongermarriagelifeDr. Dave Schramm:https://drdaveschramm.comhttps://drdavespeaks.comFacebook: https://www.facebook.com/DrDaveUSUFacebook Marriage Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/770019130329579Facebook Parenting GroupVisit our site for FREE relationship resources and regular giveaways: Strongermarriage.org Podcast.stongermarriage.org YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@StrongerMarriageLife TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@strongermarriagelife Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/strongermarriagelife/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/strongermarriage/ Facebook Marriage Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/770019130329579 Dr. Dave Schramm: http://drdaveschramm.com http://drdavespeaks.com Dr. Liz Hale: http://www.drlizhale.com/