Something Positive for Positive People

Our guest Kevin speaks to his personal experiences as someone who just wants to connect and has a genuine interest in vulnerability. We share some of his experiences with the men he was sexually active with before his herpes diagnosis and how that shifted for him AFTER his diagnosis. What I love most about his podcast episode is that he never speaks to identifying AS anything in terms of a label, but his existence describes it for him to where he didn't have to explain a damn thing. I want each of you to take a page out of Kevin's book, or a clip out of his podcast episode . . . That's more accurate lol. Labels are copouts for people doing the work of getting to know us. Let's start living out loud as ourselves and minimize the explanations of our existence.

This is a very important podcast episode for me. The reason is, that I am getting out of my own way and allowing myself to receive for once. It's been a very egoic thing for me to assume people will do for me just because I'm "good" or they "like" me, when the reality is that I'm running a business and enabling people to take advantage of me/my time/my business, while hindering the evolution and impact of it. This episode is the transition point between how things WERE and how they ARE. I really can't be replicating free information I've already put time into through this podcast/non profit/surveys/events/etc. in 1-1 conversations anymore with folks who haven't demonstrated investment to SPFPP. This means donations, sharing of content, showing up at the free events I put together, and any other offering of participation to engage that isn't necessarily exclusively aligned with your convenience. I realize I've enabled people to "take" from me and the organization, and now with that, I have to take responsibility for my role in that I haven't asked you all for what I and SPFPP need for you to even give. This episode does all the explaining about my intention, where to find free information and how we'll engage moving forward if we're in contact. I wanna thank you in advance for respecting my decision here as things move forward.

After some challenging reflections I have to put my ego to the side and begin to run this business like a business. Yes it's a non profit, but I see the impact in relation to where other . . . less impactful organizations are providing less and receiving more investment from us. The changes are going to be better for myself and the SPFPP community as it exists now and how it will later. I realize I've enabled people in various ways and I've also enabled myself to stay stuck. Effective immediately, we are all going to be doing better and challenging ourselves, removing the obstacles in our way from living the life we choose.

Launched in February 2020 3 months after encountering a fallen angel, the blessing of HSV bestowed upon our podcast guest today has become the catalyst fueling tens of thousands of women around the world. What Safe Slut stands for is self-empowerment through sexual expression. Safe Slut joins SPFPP to share her story being diagnosed with genital HSV-2 and how she was able to lean into this insecurity and make it literally one of the best things that's ever happened for her. Check out her Onlyfans and other social media accounts! Stay Slutty! :p Instagram: @Safe.Slut Instagram Backup: @safe.Slutt Tiktok: Safe.Slut Twitter: @Safe_Slut Patreon: www.patreon.com/safeslut Onlyfans: @herpes.witch YouTube: Safe Slut

Jamie Cawelti is the Executive Director of Sex Positive World, and runs Given Consent! I asked Jamie to join us for a workshop for folks living with herpes as a way of introducing them to the self-reflective tools and support resources people struggle to find their way to, but are always thankful they found them. So much of the non-sex components of sex are presented in this community. We often go straight into looking for a partner or avoiding disclosures. What I present here is a much safer space where practicing saying no, disclosing, and learning what you want so you can ask for it is really beneficial. This space offers something I haven't found in support groups, and it isn't exclusive to people with herpes, it's a mixed back of what you may need to support your healing through community. www.sexpositiveworld.org www.givenconsent.com @Givenconsent on socials STARS Workbook: www.maketimeforthetalk.com

I get tested for HIV, chlamydia, ghonnorea, syphillis (actually I didn't for this one because I was recently tested for that one), hepatitis c (which is on the rise) with Pivot Health here in Portland, Oregon! Listen to the process here on this episode of SPFPP!

When you spend so long in an identity that's safe for you, what happens is you attempt to become that person. I became Honmychest not realizing it was supposed to serve a purpose of just getting me through the villanry that is stigma. I downplayed and forgot how to be me. I'm figuring that out more for myself now as I navigate things I want to do for me using the Tony Stark and Iron Man comparison because we're so similar. I made my stigma suit, honmychest because that was the hero I needed when diagnosed. But really that's the suit, and I'm the pilot of it, meaning I have to practice being me, not the creator of the hero, but the hero myself as that's how strongly I identify with it. Enjoy this one! It's kinda deep!

The Iron Man Suit served Tony Stark very well to get him out of the unfortunate circumstance he was in. It definitely saved his life, but more importantly, outside looking in, it changed his life. When you take a much deeper look though, I am willing to argue that the suit didn't do anything at all. The creation of it came from Tony himself because he was present to his circumstances and out of recognition of his own needs, the Iron Man suit and persona was born. I've been struggling with integrating Honmychest into who I am as Courtney Brame, and all this time the answer was right here. I don't need to integrate something that came from within me. I need to remember that this creation served a purpose as a result of a situation I was present for, and recognized I had to become something more than what I believed myself capable of being in that moment. That moment has gone on for 5 years. 5 years of me challenging my beliefs of what I was capable of through the the experiences I had as honmychest only to realize none of those were possible without Courtney. Honmychest did for me what the Iron Man Suit did for Tony Stark. It was a pathway to Self. I ain't gathering infinity stones or anything like that, but I can confidently say that my Selfed path through the Honmychest suit has served its purpose as I explore one less external to cultivate my self image.

I visited home for 10 days and got to witness the challenge of being who I am or reverting back to who I think others think I am. I had an interesting handful of experiences. I will say, I cannot wait to get back to Portland though and develop a new routine incorporating journaling into it as well. This trip home empowered me to revisit family, friendship, and my relationship to myself.

Jessica Werner is an Ohio public health worker who recently through her efforts to advocate for uterus owners of color, LGBT community members, masturbation as STD Prevention and contraception was terminated from her place of employment for being sex positive. We talk a lot about censorship on social media regularly to the point of having to change spelling and wording to talk about sex education in order for it to maintain visibility on the social platforms. I'm active most on Instagram and see sex educators facing just having their content removed or not visible, but Jessica was fired for literally doing her job. There's a political agenda for what STD Prevention efforts are supposed to look like even at Government funding awarded organizations for them to . . . do their jobs? I don't even know anymore. Jessica was interviewed by media outlets and those are linked in the show notes. Sex education empowers people to take their power back through liberation of self. The status quo loses its control over the profitability of oppressed bodies when we learn that, so support a sex educator as soon as you can by uplifting their content, Venmoing if possible, and working with us when you can.