Something Positive for Positive People

I get tested for HIV, chlamydia, ghonnorea, syphillis (actually I didn't for this one because I was recently tested for that one), hepatitis c (which is on the rise) with Pivot Health here in Portland, Oregon! Listen to the process here on this episode of SPFPP!

When you spend so long in an identity that's safe for you, what happens is you attempt to become that person. I became Honmychest not realizing it was supposed to serve a purpose of just getting me through the villanry that is stigma. I downplayed and forgot how to be me. I'm figuring that out more for myself now as I navigate things I want to do for me using the Tony Stark and Iron Man comparison because we're so similar. I made my stigma suit, honmychest because that was the hero I needed when diagnosed. But really that's the suit, and I'm the pilot of it, meaning I have to practice being me, not the creator of the hero, but the hero myself as that's how strongly I identify with it. Enjoy this one! It's kinda deep!

The Iron Man Suit served Tony Stark very well to get him out of the unfortunate circumstance he was in. It definitely saved his life, but more importantly, outside looking in, it changed his life. When you take a much deeper look though, I am willing to argue that the suit didn't do anything at all. The creation of it came from Tony himself because he was present to his circumstances and out of recognition of his own needs, the Iron Man suit and persona was born. I've been struggling with integrating Honmychest into who I am as Courtney Brame, and all this time the answer was right here. I don't need to integrate something that came from within me. I need to remember that this creation served a purpose as a result of a situation I was present for, and recognized I had to become something more than what I believed myself capable of being in that moment. That moment has gone on for 5 years. 5 years of me challenging my beliefs of what I was capable of through the the experiences I had as honmychest only to realize none of those were possible without Courtney. Honmychest did for me what the Iron Man Suit did for Tony Stark. It was a pathway to Self. I ain't gathering infinity stones or anything like that, but I can confidently say that my Selfed path through the Honmychest suit has served its purpose as I explore one less external to cultivate my self image.

I visited home for 10 days and got to witness the challenge of being who I am or reverting back to who I think others think I am. I had an interesting handful of experiences. I will say, I cannot wait to get back to Portland though and develop a new routine incorporating journaling into it as well. This trip home empowered me to revisit family, friendship, and my relationship to myself.

Jessica Werner is an Ohio public health worker who recently through her efforts to advocate for uterus owners of color, LGBT community members, masturbation as STD Prevention and contraception was terminated from her place of employment for being sex positive. We talk a lot about censorship on social media regularly to the point of having to change spelling and wording to talk about sex education in order for it to maintain visibility on the social platforms. I'm active most on Instagram and see sex educators facing just having their content removed or not visible, but Jessica was fired for literally doing her job. There's a political agenda for what STD Prevention efforts are supposed to look like even at Government funding awarded organizations for them to . . . do their jobs? I don't even know anymore. Jessica was interviewed by media outlets and those are linked in the show notes. Sex education empowers people to take their power back through liberation of self. The status quo loses its control over the profitability of oppressed bodies when we learn that, so support a sex educator as soon as you can by uplifting their content, Venmoing if possible, and working with us when you can.

Woo! If you liked Manifesto, you'll love Selfed. The more I speak to it, the more clearly it begins to define the healing process in a way that makes sense. The uncoupling of identity from its association is the working definition I have for selfed. Looking at life as the pursuit of wholeness with the expected pursuit to look like what society labels you and the other for your sense of fulfillment. To be able to identify that exclusively in its evolved essence . . . I can't type this in a way that doesn't sound super woo woo, so I hope that my words in this podcast communicate effectively.

I've put a pause on my social media posting for Something Positive for Positive People in order to make space for awareness of actions to take regarding the Supreme Court overturning Roe v Wade which protected people's access to abortion. Herpes conversations take the back seat because to human rights and it just doesn't feel right posting as if nothing happened, or is happening. This manifesto began as what was supposed to just be a journal entry, but it felt like things bubbling up inside me were able to come to my awareness as the pen rolled over the paper. The women around me emphasized the silence of men heavily and with some conversations, I realize there's a major distrust in the masculine on the liberal side of things, whereas the conservative side doesn't have that. Rebuilding trust in the masculine requires the masculine to be vulnerable and identify itself apart from the language we've given to it limiting it only in relation to pursuing wholeness through the reconnecting to the feminine. Now that this has made its way through me, I feel a shift that I can't describe. I feel better about reengaging on social media now.

Julian shares his struggles with addiction and his healing process while recovering in community. What I love about this episode is that we have a masculine presence here, not in the sense of in relation to the feminine or exclusively to sex. We are able to put a vulnerability lens to our displays of masculinity hopefully as an example for other men to express their emotions and healing in their own ways as well. Here's a link to the podcast on love addiction I mentioned: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/love-addiction-with-vic-mensa/id1449305737?i=1000433203421

July 21 at 6:30pm Pacific Time, MARK YOUR CALENDAR AND RSVP WITH ME! RSVP Here: https://forms.gle/MWSddcXYDahE4yqV6 There's an event coming where we can virtually commune as a way of being introduced to the world of sex-positivity. . . or Sex Positive World. Alright ya’ll, it’s here. The podcast episode I been hyping up that’s about to change the trajectory of people navigating a new herpes diagnosis! Jamie and I speak to what Sex Positive World offers and how it relates to reconnecting with (or connecting with for the first time) your own sexuality and doing so in a supportive, inclusive community space. I feel like this is the BEST thing I can do for our community directly as most of my time lately is venturing into bringing sex positivity into healthcare. I hope this directs people into sex positivity so that providers and patients can connect easier to be on the same page. Please RSVP and check out the event. See if it’s for you and go from there.

The 69 is all about perspective. I've had a healing experience that impacted me immediately because I decided to finally ask for what I needed, which is foreign to me as someone who's been disappointed so often by people. What I learned is that I've created a narrative about my beliefs that stems from thinking that I know what other people think of me and responding to that. This started with my parents. I sought out to resolve our unfinished business directly and it paid off. I hope this episode is one you find useful for wherever you are in your life experience and that if you can attempt this exercise, that you do. Since I mentioned it, the link to the intro to sex positivity will be added to THAT episode which will be episode 237. The show notes will contain a link to the google forms and you can RSVP for the event by July 20, 2022. I'll send the calendar invite about a week before but if you're interested in learning how sex positivity can be a great space for resources navigating relationships after a diagnosis, I strongly encourage you to attend the virtual meeting July 21 at 6:30pm pacific time.