The Leading Edge in Emotionally Focused Therapy

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Oct 7, 2025 • 29min

127. Stage 2 Series: Cargiving Response - Step 6 Orientation to Green Lights

Welcome to the Leading Edge in Emotionally Focused Therapy, hosted by Drs. James Hawkins, Ph.D., LPC, and Ryan Rana, Ph.D., LMFT, LPC—Renowned ICEEFT Therapists, Supervisors, and Trainers. We're thrilled to have you with us. We believe this podcast, a valuable resource, will empower you to push the boundaries in your work, helping individuals and couples connect more deeply with themselves and each other. Here's a podcast episode description and main points: Episode Description: Dive deep into the heart of Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT) as Dr. James Hawkins and Dr. Ryan Rana explore Step Six: Activating the Caregiving System. Learn how therapists can create transformative moments of connection by inviting partners to respond with genuine comfort and vulnerability. Main Points: 1. The Importance of Caregiving Responses - EFT focuses on responsiveness between partners - Caregiving is about creating genuine comfort, not problem-solving - Therapists must invite partners into emotional vulnerability carefully 2. Key Techniques for Inviting Caregiving Responses - Use somatic, present-moment language - Focus on immediate bodily reactions - Ask specific questions that trigger instinctual care - Maintain the same depth and pacing used in emotional exploration 3. Green Light Moments - Recognize when a partner is ready to provide comfort - Look for non-verbal and emotional engagement - Create space for natural, instinctive caregiving responses 4. Therapeutic Approach - Avoid meta-commentary or intellectual responses - Stay attuned to partners' emotional states - Help partners access their innate capacity for emotional support To support our mission and help us continue producing impactful content, your financial contributions via Venmo (@leftpodcast) are greatly appreciated. They play a significant role in keeping this valuable resource available and are a testament to your commitment to our cause. We aim to equip therapists with practical tools and encouragement for addressing relational distress. We're also excited to be part of the team behind Success in Vulnerability (SV)—your premier online education platform. SV offers innovative instruction to enhance your therapeutic effectiveness through exclusive modules and in-depth clinical examples.  Stay connected with us: Facebook: Follow our page @pushtheleadingedge Ryan: Follow @ryanranaprofessionaltraining on Facebook and visit his website James: Follow @dochawklpc on Facebook and Instagram, or visit his website at dochawklpc.com George Faller: Visit georgefaller.com If you like the concepts discussed on this podcast you can explore our online training program, Success in Vulnerability (SV). Thank you for being part of our community. Let's push the leading edge together!
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Sep 30, 2025 • 22min

126. Stage 2 Series: Enactments-Step 5

Welcome to the Leading Edge in Emotionally Focused Therapy, hosted by Drs. James Hawkins, Ph.D., LPC, and Ryan Rana, Ph.D., LMFT, LPC—Renowned ICEEFT Therapists, Supervisors, and Trainers. We're thrilled to have you with us. We believe this podcast, a valuable resource, will empower you to push the boundaries in your work, helping individuals and couples connect more deeply with themselves and each other. Listeners will learn about the critical differences between Stage One and Stage Two enactments, understanding that Stage Two is about restructuring relationships and creating a secure emotional bond. The episode outlines key targets for therapists, including uncovering negative self-views, exploring deep-seated primary emotions, and creating opportunities for emotionally risky revelations. To support our mission and help us continue producing impactful content, your financial contributions via Venmo (@leftpodcast) are greatly appreciated. They play a significant role in keeping this valuable resource available and are a testament to your commitment to our cause. We aim to equip therapists with practical tools and encouragement for addressing relational distress. We're also excited to be part of the team behind Success in Vulnerability (SV)—your premier online education platform. SV offers innovative instruction to enhance your therapeutic effectiveness through exclusive modules and in-depth clinical examples.  Stay connected with us: Facebook: Follow our page @pushtheleadingedge Ryan: Follow @ryanranaprofessionaltraining on Facebook and visit his website James: Follow @dochawklpc on Facebook and Instagram, or visit his website at dochawklpc.com George Faller: Visit georgefaller.com If you like the concepts discussed on this podcast you can explore our online training program, Success in Vulnerability (SV). Thank you for being part of our community. Let's push the leading edge together!
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Sep 17, 2025 • 31min

125. Stage 2 Series: Accessing and Sharing the Negative View of Self-Important Component of Restructuring the Bond

Welcome to the Leading Edge in Emotionally Focused Therapy, hosted by Drs. James Hawkins, Ph.D., LPC, and Ryan Rana, Ph.D., LMFT, LPC—Renowned ICEEFT Therapists, Supervisors, and Trainers. We're thrilled to have you with us. We believe this podcast, a valuable resource, will empower you to push the boundaries in your work, helping individuals and couples connect more deeply with themselves and each other. The episode focuses on working with the negative view of self in Stage Two of EFT therapy, exploring the deep, vulnerable process of helping clients confront and share their most painful self-perceptions. Main Points: 1. Negative View of Self Characteristics: - Goes beyond just emotions - Represents core identity messages - Often rooted in past traumas and attachment injuries - Involves believing fundamental negative things about oneself 2. Stage Two Therapeutic Approach: - Linger and excavate the deepest negative self-messages - Use enactments to reveal core identity beliefs - Help clients share their most vulnerable self-perceptions - Create opportunities for partner acceptance 3. Key Therapeutic Strategies: - Slow, careful exploration of negative self-view - Validate and reflect deeply - Allow partners to provide compassionate, attuned responses - Avoid rushing or trying to immediately "fix" negative beliefs 4. Goals: - Help clients reveal their most painful self-perceptions - Create space for partner acceptance - Gradually restructure negative self-beliefs - Support healing from past relational wounds The episode emphasizes that working with a negative view of self is a profound, delicate process requiring patience, depth, and compassionate therapeutic skill. To support our mission and help us continue producing impactful content, your financial contributions via Venmo (@leftpodcast) are greatly appreciated. They play a significant role in keeping this valuable resource available and are a testament to your commitment to our cause. We aim to equip therapists with practical tools and encouragement for addressing relational distress. We're also excited to be part of the team behind Success in Vulnerability (SV)—your premier online education platform. SV offers innovative instruction to enhance your therapeutic effectiveness through exclusive modules and in-depth clinical examples.  Stay connected with us: Facebook: Follow our page @pushtheleadingedge Ryan: Follow @ryanranaprofessionaltraining on Facebook and visit his website James: Follow @dochawklpc on Facebook and Instagram, or visit his website at dochawklpc.com George Faller: Visit georgefaller.com If you like the concepts discussed on this podcast you can explore our online training program, Success in Vulnerability (SV). Thank you for being part of our community. Let's push the leading edge together!
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Sep 3, 2025 • 33min

124. Stage 2 Series: 16 Stones-How Deep is Deep Enough-Hovering in Stage 2, Step 5

Welcome to the Leading Edge in Emotionally Focused Therapy, hosted by Drs. James Hawkins, Ph.D., LPC, and Ryan Rana, Ph.D., LMFT, LPC—Renowned ICEEFT Therapists, Supervisors, and Trainers. We're thrilled to have you with us. We believe this podcast, a valuable resource, will empower you to push the boundaries in your work, helping individuals and couples connect more deeply with themselves and each other. In this episode of "Leading Edge in Emotionally Focused Therapy", Dr. James Hawkins and Dr. Ryan Rana dive deep into Stage Two therapy, exploring the critical question: "How deep is deep enough?" They discuss the nuanced process of helping couples explore painful emotional experiences and turn over metaphorical "stones" of past trauma and attachment injuries. Top Points: Stage Two Depth Requires Repetition Re-engagement for withdrawers typically takes 3-9 sessions Therapists must repeatedly explore painful experiences Build momentum from session to session Key Stage Two Strategies Enter difficult conversations from a positive foundation Use scene-setting techniques to evoke deeper emotions Convert individual pain into co-regulation opportunities Exploring "Stones" (Painful Experiences) Look for deepest fears Uncover negative self-views Explore barriers to seeking comfort Address attachment injuries, trauma, marginalization experiences Critical Therapeutic Approach Walk with clients through their emotional "basement" Help clients build confidence in facing difficult memories Ensure partners can provide comfort in vulnerable moments Create "experiential bridges" for future emotional support   To support our mission and help us continue producing impactful content, your financial contributions via Venmo (@leftpodcast) are greatly appreciated. They play a significant role in keeping this valuable resource available and are a testament to your commitment to our cause. We aim to equip therapists with practical tools and encouragement for addressing relational distress. We're also excited to be part of the team behind Success in Vulnerability (SV)—your premier online education platform. SV offers innovative instruction to enhance your therapeutic effectiveness through exclusive modules and in-depth clinical examples.  Stay connected with us: Facebook: Follow our page @pushtheleadingedge Ryan: Follow @ryanranaprofessionaltraining on Facebook and visit his website James: Follow @dochawklpc on Facebook and Instagram, or visit his website at dochawklpc.com George Faller: Visit georgefaller.com If you like the concepts discussed on this podcast you can explore our online training program, Success in Vulnerability (SV). Thank you for being part of our community. Let's push the leading edge together!
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Aug 27, 2025 • 28min

123. Stage 2 Series: Step 5-The D.A.Ms We Believe

Welcome to the Leading Edge in Emotionally Focused Therapy, hosted by Drs. James Hawkins, Ph.D., LPC, and Ryan Rana, Ph.D., LMFT, LPC—Renowned ICEEFT Therapists, Supervisors, and Trainers. We're thrilled to have you with us. We believe this podcast, a valuable resource, will empower you to push the boundaries in your work, helping individuals and couples connect more deeply with themselves and each other. Summary: This episode of "Push the Leading Edge" focuses on Stage 2, Step 5 of Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT), specifically exploring the concept of "Deadly Attachment Messages" (DAMs) and their role in deepening therapeutic work. Dr. James Hawkins and Dr. Ryan Rana discuss how therapists can help clients access and process their most painful, internalized beliefs about themselves—beliefs that often drive protective behaviors in relationships. The episode emphasizes the importance of staying with clients in these vulnerable places, facilitating experiential change, and preparing for partner acceptance and new ways of reaching for needs. The hosts also share practical tips, personal experiences, and resources for therapists seeking to improve their EFT practice. Top 10 Points: 1. **EFT Intensives Resource**: The hosts highlight EFT intensives available in Northwest Arkansas, recommending them as valuable resources for therapists and couples. intensives@thejoshuacenter.com.  2. **Upcoming SV Focus Lab**: Announcement and encouragement to attend the SV Focus Lab in September 2025, focusing on therapeutic pivots. 3. **Stage 2 Overview**: Stage 2 in EFT is about restructuring the bond by helping the more withdrawn partner re-engage vulnerably, followed by work with the pursuing partner to soften their approach. 4. **Step 5 Focus**: Step 5 is the most intra-psychic part of EFT, where therapists help clients access the deep, painful beliefs about themselves that have developed from negative cycles. 5. **Deadly Attachment Messages (DAMs)**: DAMs are the core negative beliefs clients hold about themselves (e.g., "I'm unlovable," "I'm stupid"), often rooted in both relationship dynamics and personal history. 6. **Stage 1 vs. Stage 2 DAMs**: In Stage 1, DAMs are often externalized (what the partner thinks of them), while in Stage 2, the focus shifts to when clients start to believe these messages about themselves. 7. **Experiential Depth**: Effective Step 5 work requires therapists to stay with clients in their pain, facilitating deep limbic (emotional) experiences rather than just cognitive insight. 8. **Therapist’s Role**: Therapists must be willing to "walk into the darkness" with clients, maintaining a non-anxious, present stance to help clients feel safe enough to explore their deepest fears. 9. **Partner Acceptance and Reaching for Needs**: After accessing DAMs, the process moves toward helping the partner accept these vulnerable parts and supporting the client in reaching for comfort and connection. 10. **Patience and Repetition**: Deepening and accessing DAMs is a repetitive, patient process—therapists may need to revisit and assemble the experience multiple times before clients can fully articulate and share their pain. Let me know if you’d like a more detailed breakdown of any specific section! To support our mission and help us continue producing impactful content, your financial contributions via Venmo (@leftpodcast) are greatly appreciated. They play a significant role in keeping this valuable resource available and are a testament to your commitment to our cause. We aim to equip therapists with practical tools and encouragement for addressing relational distress. We're also excited to be part of the team behind Success in Vulnerability (SV)—your premier online education platform. SV offers innovative instruction to enhance your therapeutic effectiveness through exclusive modules and in-depth clinical examples.  Stay connected with us: Facebook: Follow our page @pushtheleadingedge Ryan: Follow @ryanranaprofessionaltraining on Facebook and visit his website James: Follow @dochawklpc on Facebook and Instagram, or visit his website at dochawklpc.com George Faller: Visit georgefaller.com If you like the concepts discussed on this podcast you can explore our online training program, Success in Vulnerability (SV). Thank you for being part of our community. Let's push the leading edge together!
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11 snips
Aug 19, 2025 • 41min

122. Stage 2 Series: Building the Bridge Into Stage 2

Dive into the intricacies of transitioning clients from stage one to stage two of emotionally focused therapy. Discover the importance of creating a safe environment and the unique characteristics of stage two, including pacing and intimacy. The hosts share practical strategies, from informed consent to session-by-session orientations. Using sports metaphors, they illustrate the concept of training emotional 'muscles.' Explore real-world examples of how vulnerability work unfolds, ensuring clients feel secure throughout their journey.
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Jul 30, 2025 • 31min

121. Special Contributor George Faller: Pivoting with Purpose: Navigating Openness in EFT

Welcome to the Leading Edge in Emotionally Focused Therapy, hosted by Drs. James Hawkins, Ph.D., LPC, and Ryan Rana, Ph.D., LMFT, LPC—Renowned ICEEFT Therapists, Supervisors, and Trainers. We're thrilled to have you with us. We believe this podcast, a valuable resource, will empower you to push the boundaries in your work, helping individuals and couples connect more deeply with themselves and each other. Join Dr. James Hawkins, Dr. Ryan Rana, and special guest George Faller as they dive deep into the art of therapeutic pivoting. Discover how skilled therapists navigate moments of client openness, transform interventions, and create powerful therapeutic breakthroughs beyond traditional block management. Show Notes: Explore the nuanced concept of clinical pivoting in Emotionally Focused Therapy Learn how to recognize and leverage moments of client openness Understand the importance of intentional therapeutic decision-making Insights from experienced EFT trainers on reading client emotional states Practical strategies for deepening therapeutic connections Key Takeaways: Pivoting isn't just about managing blocks; it's about creating opportunities Attunement drives therapeutic intervention choices Therapists can become more intentional by understanding their moment-to-moment decision-making Special Announcement: Join the presenters at the SV Focus Lab, September 11-13, 2025, in Fayetteville, Arkansas (hybrid event) to dive deeper into these concepts! Recommended for: EFT therapists, counselors, and relationship specialists looking to enhance their clinical skills and therapeutic flexibility. Link for $50 discount to Focus Lab https://www.svfocuslab.com/leadingedge To support our mission and help us continue producing impactful content, your financial contributions via Venmo (@leftpodcast) are greatly appreciated. They play a significant role in keeping this valuable resource available and are a testament to your commitment to our cause. We aim to equip therapists with practical tools and encouragement for addressing relational distress. We're also excited to be part of the team behind Success in Vulnerability (SV)—your premier online education platform. SV offers innovative instruction to enhance your therapeutic effectiveness through exclusive modules and in-depth clinical examples.  Stay connected with us: Facebook: Follow our page @pushtheleadingedge Ryan: Follow @ryanranaprofessionaltraining on Facebook and visit his website James: Follow @dochawklpc on Facebook and Instagram, or visit his website at dochawklpc.com George Faller: Visit georgefaller.com If you like the concepts discussed on this podcast you can explore our online training program, Success in Vulnerability (SV). Thank you for being part of our community. Let's push the leading edge together!
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Jul 28, 2025 • 24min

120. Stage 2 Series: Accessing and Utilizing Vulnerability in Stage 2: Introduction to Series

Welcome to the Leading Edge in Emotionally Focused Therapy, hosted by Drs. James Hawkins, Ph.D., LPC, and Ryan Rana, Ph.D., LMFT, LPC—Renowned ICEEFT Therapists, Supervisors, and Trainers. We're thrilled to have you with us. We believe this podcast, a valuable resource, will empower you to push the boundaries in your work, helping individuals and couples connect more deeply with themselves and each other. Join Dr. James Hawkins and Dr. Ryan Rana as they dive deep into the nuanced world of Stage 2 in Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT). In this illuminating episode, they unpack the critical transition from Stage 1 to Stage 2, providing therapists with a comprehensive guide to understanding when and how to help couples progress in their therapeutic journey. Using their innovative SAFE acronym, they provide practical insights into assessing client readiness, deepening vulnerability, and creating transformative therapeutic experiences. Episode Outline: Introduction SV Focus Lab invitation Podcast mission and purpose Importance of continuous learning in EFT Stage 2 Overview Common misconceptions about Stage 2 Challenges therapists face in transitioning The need for nuanced understanding SAFE Acronym Breakdown S - See the Cycle Cognitive and experiential awareness Understanding interpersonal impact A - Access Vulnerability Depth of emotional exploration Balancing client capacity F - Flexible Responses Adapting to partner's protective moves Demonstrating relational safety E - Experiential Corrections Importance of repeated corrective experiences Assessing readiness for Stage 2 Practical Applications Assessment techniques Therapeutic strategies Warning signs and opportunities Conclusion Invitation for further learning Call to action for therapists Key Takeaways: Understanding Stage 2 is about nuanced, patient therapeutic work Clients must demonstrate readiness through multiple experiences Therapists must balance pushing boundaries while respecting client capacity To support our mission and help us continue producing impactful content, your financial contributions via Venmo (@leftpodcast) are greatly appreciated. They play a significant role in keeping this valuable resource available and are a testament to your commitment to our cause. We aim to equip therapists with practical tools and encouragement for addressing relational distress. We're also excited to be part of the team behind Success in Vulnerability (SV)—your premier online education platform. SV offers innovative instruction to enhance your therapeutic effectiveness through exclusive modules and in-depth clinical examples.  Stay connected with us: Facebook: Follow our page @pushtheleadingedge Ryan: Follow @ryanranaprofessionaltraining on Facebook and visit his website James: Follow @dochawklpc on Facebook and Instagram, or visit his website at dochawklpc.com George Faller: Visit georgefaller.com If you like the concepts discussed on this podcast you can explore our online training program, Success in Vulnerability (SV). Thank you for being part of our community. Let's push the leading edge together!
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10 snips
Jul 19, 2025 • 37min

119. R.A.V.E.(ing) The Professional Human in Therapy: Self of the Therapist Episode w/ Dr. Chad Imhoff

Dr. Chad Imhoff, known as 'the EFT guy,' shares his insights on integrating therapist humanity into practice. He discusses how embracing emotional responses combats burnout and enhances client connections. Discover the innovative TEMPO technique for organizing emotional experiences and the RAVE approach for validating therapists' reactions. Chad emphasizes the importance of recognizing personal triggers to improve client care and highlights the balance needed between professionalism and authenticity in therapy.
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10 snips
Jul 19, 2025 • 45min

118. Grief's Sacred Journey: Healing Through Connection with Dr. Tal Padeh

Welcome to the Leading Edge in Emotionally Focused Therapy, hosted by Drs. James Hawkins, Ph.D., LPC, and Ryan Rana, Ph.D., LMFT, LPC—Renowned ICEEFT Therapists, Supervisors, and Trainers. We're thrilled to have you with us. We believe this podcast, a valuable resource, will empower you to push the boundaries in your work, helping individuals and couples connect more deeply with themselves and each other. In this profound exploration of grief, Dr. Tal Padeh (ICEEFT Trainer, Israel EFT Center) reveals the transformative power of emotional connection. Through the lens of Emotionally Focused Therapy, we discover how grief can be a pathway to deeper understanding, love, and healing. Join us as we honor the complexity of loss and the human capacity to process pain with compassion and resilience. Another special treat, Nicola joined and added another layer of experience to this interview.  Grief is a natural human experience that requires a safe, compassionate space to process. Encountering loss involves recognizing what cannot be replaced and honoring the depth of emotional pain Couples can either be pushed apart or drawn closer through shared grief experiences. Grief is not something to "get over," but a journey of continued connection and love with one's own experience, accompanied by the support of others.  Cultural and personal defenses can block grief processing, but therapeutic support can help navigate these barriers to convert them into beautiful opportunities for sacred experience.  To support our mission and help us continue producing impactful content, your financial contributions via Venmo (@leftpodcast) are greatly appreciated. They play a significant role in keeping this valuable resource available and are a testament to your commitment to our cause. We aim to equip therapists with practical tools and encouragement for addressing relational distress. We're also excited to be part of the team behind Success in Vulnerability (SV)—your premier online education platform. SV offers innovative instruction to enhance your therapeutic effectiveness through exclusive modules and in-depth clinical examples.  Stay connected with us: Facebook: Follow our page @pushtheleadingedge Ryan: Follow @ryanranaprofessionaltraining on Facebook and visit his website James: Follow @dochawklpc on Facebook and Instagram, or visit his website at dochawklpc.com George Faller: Visit georgefaller.com If you like the concepts discussed on this podcast you can explore our online training program, Success in Vulnerability (SV). Thank you for being part of our community. Let's push the leading edge together!

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