Re-release: Why love –and therapy– means going in a direction you don’t yet know (w/ Dr. Orna Guralnik)
Feb 19, 2024
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Dr. Orna Guralnik, featured in Couples Therapy, discusses the power of psychoanalysis in improving relationships. She debunks myths about therapy timing, offers tips for unblocking connections, and emphasizes the importance of understanding deeper root issues for true transformation. The conversation also explores systemic thinking in politics, culture, and mental well-being, promoting inclusivity, embracing vulnerability, and exploring the unknown.
Therapy provides a safe space for deep introspection and personal growth in relationships.
Historical and systemic factors significantly impact emotional responses and communication within relationships.
Deep dives
Understanding Different Perspectives in Relationships
In this podcast episode, the host discusses his fascination with other people's relationships and the complexities that come with understanding different perspectives. He shares his personal experience of adjusting to his wife's more reserved nature and the constant negotiations required in relationships. The guest, psychologist Orna Garalnik, specializes in understanding and untangling these relationship dynamics. She explains how their documentary series, Couples Therapy, aims to provide a time-limited therapy experience for couples through filming hidden cameras. Garalnik highlights the importance of understanding the influence of cultural backgrounds and historical forces in relationships, emphasizing how these factors shape emotional responses and expectations. Overall, the conversation explores how understanding these dynamics can lead to better human connections professionally, platonically, and romantically.
The Intensified Therapeutic Process on Camera
Dr. Orna Garalnik discusses her experience working on the docu-series Couples Therapy, where therapy sessions are filmed from beginning to end. She describes the intensity that comes with being on camera, as couples feel the pressure of the limited timeframe for therapy. Garalnik highlights the unique aspect of the show, how the viewers also engage in their own emotional journey and learn about better communication and self-awareness in relationships. The intensified process on camera allows for faster therapy progress compared to regular practice. The therapeutic experience on the show provides a safe space for couples to explore their vulnerabilities, allowing for deep introspection and personal growth within a limited time frame.
The Power of Love and Changing Narratives
Dr. Orna Garalnik shares her belief in the power and importance of love. She emphasizes that love is a natural inclination for human beings and brings out the best in us. However, she acknowledges that navigating relationships and changing negative narratives can be challenging. Dr. Garalnik explains that therapy involves going beyond what is known and delving into the deeper root issues. It requires allowing oneself to experience new perspectives and challenging unconscious motivations, which takes time, trust, and courage. She debunks the idea of simple solutions or a universal list to improve relationships, emphasizing the importance of understanding individual complexity and the influence of historical and systemic factors.
The Impact of Socio-Political and Historical Factors on Relationships
Dr. Garalnik discusses how socio-political and historical factors influence relationships. She highlights that even seemingly similar backgrounds can bring different family dynamics, shaping individual experiences and perspectives. Dr. Garalnik gives examples of interracial couples and how their differing backgrounds can create varying expectations or anxieties about the future. These external factors, such as racial or class differences, can significantly impact emotional responses and communication within relationships. Additionally, she describes how systemic issues like colonialism and racism implicitly shape our thinking and negotiation skills. Dr. Garalnik believes that acknowledging and understanding these systemic influences can lead to better mutual understanding and empathetic connections.
In her critically acclaimed Showtime docuseries, Couples Therapy, clinical psychologist and psychoanalyst Dr. Orna Guralnik thinks deeply about relationships, emotions, and connection. In this episode, Dr. Guralnik explains why she believes psychoanalysis helps us love better, dispels myths about the right time to go to therapy, and gives tips on how to unblock our relationship with the world around us. For the full text transcript, visit go.ted.com/BHTranscripts