Pure Desire Podcast 005 - Double Bind & Commitment to Change
Aug 8, 2017
In this enlightening discussion, Bob Vandermeer, a pastor and a Pastoral Sex Addiction Professional, shares his journey from sex addiction to recovery. He discusses the 'Double Bind' concept, illustrating how it causes confusion and stagnation in both addiction and leadership. Bob introduces the 'Commitment to Change' tool, emphasizing accountability and practical steps for transformation. He highlights common mistakes people make and the importance of holistic commitments to achieve emotional health and recovery momentum.
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Bob's Recovery Journey From Ministry Low
- Bob shares that he carried sex addiction into ministry and reached a suicidal low before starting recovery.
- He worked valet jobs, sought help, and later represented Pure Desire in Latin America with his wife.
What A Double Bind Really Is
- A double bind is being stuck between two painful or difficult options so either choice causes distress.
- Recognizing the double bind reveals why we stagnate and helps target the real decision to change.
Double Binds Compound Over Time
- Double binds compound and cascade into more problems when avoided, pushing you down the FASTER scale.
- Connecting current stuckness to past limbic lies reveals why certain choices feel uniquely hard.