Author Clover Stroud and Fearne explore the transformative power of grief and the beauty found amidst the darkness. They discuss the importance of savoring small moments, accepting death as a liberating force, and the non-linear nature of grief. Clover's book, 'The Red of My Blood', delves into life and death.
Acknowledging death's presence allows us to appreciate the preciousness of life and focus on meaningful connections.
Grief is a complex process that includes experiencing both pain and beauty, and embracing the feelings associated with loss is essential for moving forward.
Remembering and talking about the person who has passed away helps keep their spirit alive and brings comfort and joy to those grieving.
Deep dives
The Power of Embracing Death
Cloverstroud, the author of The Red of My Blood, explores her relationship with death after the loss of her sister. She emphasizes the importance of openly discussing death, bringing it into our lives vividly and lively. By acknowledging death's presence, we can appreciate the preciousness of life and focus on meaningful connections. Clover shares her own experiences of grief, including the physically and mentally excruciating pain and the strange breaking open of herself. She also discusses the vibrant colors and vividness she experienced during the grieving process, highlighting the beauty that death can bring even amidst the pain.
Living a Life of Gratitude and Creativity
The podcast episode delves into the impact of death on one's perspective and priorities. Cloverstroud shares how the loss of her sister has led her to live a more authentic and creative life. She emphasizes the importance of gratitude and expressing love to those we care about. Clover also explores the concept of regret in the context of death, reassuring that regrets are common and part of the grieving process. She encourages embracing the complex feelings associated with grief and finding beauty and wonder in the midst of loss.
Navigating Signs, Regrets, and the Journey Forward
The episode explores the topic of signs from the deceased and the complexities they can bring. Cloverstroud discusses her own oscillating feelings toward signs and the desire to believe in their significance while also acknowledging the possibility of coincidences. She also delves into the concept of regrets and the longing to have done more for loved ones who have passed away. However, she emphasizes the importance of letting go of regrets and holding onto the feelings of love and connection instead. The episode concludes by highlighting the resilience of the human spirit and the ability to move forward in life despite the profound losses experienced.
Navigating the Complexity of Grief
Grief is not a linear process, and the cliché that time heals does not hold true for everyone. It is common to experience unexpected waves of heavy grief even after feeling okay for a while. There are no rules for how to grieve or a set timeline for when one should feel better. It is essential to allow oneself to feel and express grief in one's own way.
The Value of Remembering and Connection
Remembering and talking about the person who has passed away is crucial in the grieving process. Sharing anecdotes and memories helps keep the person's spirit alive, and it brings comfort and joy to those grieving. It is the small, everyday moments and connections that truly matter, not material possessions or extravagant experiences. By focusing on nurturing relationships and cherishing the little moments, we can find meaning and happiness in life.
Death is often viewed as something dark and muted, but after the death of her beloved sister, author Clover Stroud began to see the world in vivid colour. In this chat Fearne and Clover explore how death can teach us that it’s the tiny moments in life that truly matter; it’s the in jokes and funny glances that we remember about people. That realisation should be liberating for us in the here and now: we can slow down, stop seeking grand success, and focus on the little things.
They also talk about their take on signs after someone’s died. Can they be mentally and emotionally helpful even if some part of us knows they’re not real?
Clover’s book is as much about life as it is death - The Red of My Blood is out now.