

S2 E10 Differentiation of Self: Coaching in Bowen Theory with Kathleen Cotter Cauley
Mar 11, 2025
Kathleen Cotter Cauley, a licensed marriage and family therapist with extensive experience in Bowen family systems theory, shares profound insights on differentiation of self. She discusses the unique coaching dynamics that prioritize observation, self-awareness, and curiosity over direct advice. Personal anecdotes highlight family interactions as emotional units, revealing the importance of navigating feedback and maintaining boundaries. Additionally, she emphasizes mindfulness in relationships, showcasing how coaching can uncover emotional patterns for personal growth.
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Coaching with Bowen Theory
- Focus on the theory, let clients be experts on their lives.
- Use family diagrams for facts, coaching for thinking, and real life for action.
Coach's Role
- Bowen coaches must also do the work themselves.
- This builds respect for the client's efforts and helps maintain objectivity.
Sports Analogy
- Bowen coaches are like sports coaches, guiding from the sidelines.
- They offer insights but let clients make their own moves on the field (life).