How to Heal Low Self Worth to Build a Fulfilling Sex Life l ft. Tara Schuster

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Aug 5, 2025

Tara Schuster, a writer and emotional wellness advocate, shares her transformative journey from self-abandonment to self-worth. She discusses how unresolved emotional wounds manifest in intimacy, encouraging listeners to prioritize their feelings in relationships. Tara reveals daily rituals like journaling and celebrating small wins that foster emotional safety and empowerment. They explore the vital role of pleasure in well-being and the importance of gratitude and self-love in healing, especially after trauma, reminding everyone to reconnect with their true selves.

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ANECDOTE

Tara's Rock Bottom Story

Tara Schuster shared hitting rock bottom on her 25th birthday which led her to start serious healing for anxiety and depression.
She described losing her job at Comedy Central as a major identity crisis that forced deeper healing and reflection.

ADVICE

Try Gratitude Practice

Start a gratitude practice even if skeptical; begin small and list simple things you're grateful for.
This practice shifts focus from lack to abundance by flipping the negative narrative.

ANECDOTE

Bra Changed Body Confidence

Tara hated her body and breasts but bought an expensive delicate bra which made her see her body as fun and worth honoring.
That bra gave her a new sense of body confidence and gratitude for her physical self.

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In this empowering episode of Sex with Emily, Dr. Emily Morse sits down with writer, producer, and self-care advocate Tara Schuster to talk about the journey from self-abandonment to self-worth. Through laughter, honesty, and raw storytelling, they explore emotional healing, sexual empowerment, and the small rituals that create lasting change.

Tara shares her background of emotional neglect and how she hit rock bottom; leading her to build a "re-parenting" plan with daily rituals like writing down wins, lighting candles, and journaling to create inner safety and structure. They discuss how unresolved emotional wounds often show up in the bedroom as self-doubt, people-pleasing, or disconnection from pleasure, and how Tara learned to stop abandoning herself in relationships by asking "Do I actually like this person?" instead of "Do they like me?"

They dive into how pleasure, including sex, isn't frivolous; it's essential to well-being, and how we must unlearn shame and guilt around joy in order to thrive.

Featured Resource:

Yes/No/Maybe List - A sexual communication tool mentioned by Tara that helped her explore new experiences and communicate openly with a partner about desires and boundaries. This structured approach allows individuals and couples to indicate their interest levels in various sexual activities, facilitating honest conversations about preferences and limits.

Timestamps:

0:00 - Introduction: Setting the Stage for Healing & Self-Worth

3:08 - Tara's Rock Bottom Moment: The Call That Changed Everything (hitting rock bottom at 25 and the decision to save her own life)

7:42 - The Desert Breakdown: When Success Isn't Enough

14:02 - The Spite Method: How Reluctant Healing Actually Works

19:19 - Body Gratitude Revolution: From Shame to Self-Celebration

22:58 - Self-Worth & Sex: Why Healing Yourself Transforms Intimacy

39:15 - Trauma-Informed Solo Practice: Safe Sexual Exploration

49:23 - The Yes/No/Maybe List: Tools for Sexual Communication