260 - The Shadow Isn't the Monster: Embracing the Gift of Maybe

Dec 16, 2025

Explore the emotional journey through uncertainty, emphasizing that small worries can morph into overwhelming fears. Jill shares a personal cancer scare, revealing how planning and fear can amplify suffering. Inspired by 'The Gift of Maybe,' the discussion highlights the power of embracing the word 'maybe' as a mental reset. Listeners are encouraged to question their inner critic and recognize worry as an unreliable narrator. The conversation ends on a hopeful note, urging openness to possibilities rather than succumbing to regret.

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INSIGHT

Shadows Magnify Small Worries

Fear stretches small worries into monstrous shadows that feel larger than reality.
Shining a light on uncertainty reveals the true, often smaller, cause of the fear.

ANECDOTE

Cancer Scare That Revealed Fear

Jill describes a cancer scare where biopsy results hinted at possible cancer and surgery was scheduled.
She prepared obsessively but discovered the uncertainty was the hardest part, not the outcome.

INSIGHT

Overplanning Doesn't Reduce Fear

Overplanning felt like control but didn't reduce Jill's uncertainty or fear.
Worrying made her suffer twice: once in anticipation and again in reality.

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The Shadow Isn't the Monster: Embracing the Gift of Maybe
In this episode, we explore the emotional toll of uncertainty and how it often tricks us into believing disaster is inevitable. But what if the worst-case scenario isn’t guaranteed? What if uncertainty isn’t the enemy, but a doorway to possibility?
We reflect on The Gift of Maybe by Allison Carmen and how a single word—“maybe”—can shift the way we handle fear and the unknown. Through a deeply personal story of a cancer scare, we see how even the most terrifying experiences can lead to unexpectedly positive outcomes.

How Fear Amplifies Uncertainty
Fear takes small problems and casts them as massive threats. This discussion opens with relatable examples—like horror movie shadows—to show how our minds exaggerate what we don’t understand.
Overplanning and the Illusion of Control
We often try to outrun fear by planning every possible outcome. But all the preparation in the world doesn’t ease uncertainty. It just makes us live the fear twice.
“Maybe” as a Mental Reset
Inspired by The Gift of Maybe, we explore how using the word “maybe” softens negative thinking and creates space for hope without forcing optimism.
Challenging Your Inner Narrator
That dramatic voice in your head predicting doom? It’s not always telling the truth. We talk about how to gently challenge it and ask the simple but profound question: “Are you sure?”
Takeaways:
When we stop trying to be certain and start allowing space for the unknown, we give life a chance to surprise us. Maybe things aren’t as bad as they seem. Maybe there’s a better ending ahead. Maybe, just maybe, you don’t know the whole story yet.
Let’s start doubting our doubts. Let’s start listening less to the fear-driven narrator and more to possibility. After all, most of the blessings in life didn’t come from certainty—they came from the unexpected.

Jill’s Links
https://abetterlifeinsmallsteps.com

https://www.youtube.com/@startwithsmallsteps
https://www.buymeacoffee.com/startwithsmallsteps
https://twitter.com/schmern
Email the podcast at jill@startwithsmallsteps.com

By choosing to watch this video or listen to this podcast, you acknowledge that you are doing so of your own free will. The content shared here reflects personal experiences and opinions and is intended for informational and inspirational purposes only. I am not a licensed healthcare provider, psychiatrist, or counselor. Any advice or suggestions offered should not be considered a substitute for professional medical or mental health advice. You are solely responsible for any decisions or actions you take based on this content.