Common Pitfalls in IFS language, with Mariel Pastor
Jan 16, 2022
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Mariel Pastor, an IFS therapist and lead trainer, discusses common pitfalls in IFS language, debunking the 'Self is good, parts are bad' belief. She explores the complexity of internal family systems, addressing the roles of managers and firefighters, and delving into different IFS therapy approaches. Additionally, she shares insights on the formation of the IFS Telehealth Collective and reflects on disrupted world tour plans amidst the pandemic.
Parts in IFS model are multifaceted and play diverse roles.
Therapists should understand nuances of parts with 'parts detector'.
Recognize that parts can assume varied roles and behaviors.
Deep dives
Challenging Misunderstandings about Self and Parts
The notion that 'self is good and parts are bad' is challenged. The IFS model emphasizes the natural multiplicity of parts within individuals, each playing a vital role. The complexity of the model and human nature is acknowledged, highlighting that all aspects of the self, including parts, contribute to the whole person. The shorthand terminology used in discussing parts is clarified, aiming to empower therapists to fully understand and appreciate the diverse elements within their clients.
Exploring the Multifaceted Nature of Parts and Feelings
Parts in the IFS model extend beyond mere feelings, encompassing multifaceted roles and characteristics. The example of anger showcases that parts exhibit various emotional nuances and can embody different roles based on context. By staying curious and utilizing the 'parts detector,' therapists can unravel the full complexity and intentions of each part, recognizing them as dynamic and multidimensional personalities.
Distinguishing Parts from Their Roles
The understanding that parts are not defined solely by their roles is highlighted. While individuals may attribute specific roles to parts such as 'manager' or 'firefighter,' it's essential to recognize that parts can assume varied roles and behaviors. The nuances of managers and firefighters in navigating challenges and vulnerabilities are emphasized, urging therapists to delve deeper into understanding the distinct functions of each part.
Revisiting Insights, Direct Access, and Externalization in IFS
The misconception that IFS solely revolves around insights is addressed, showcasing the significance of other therapeutic approaches. Insights, direct access, and externalization are explored as three powerful IFS methods, each offering unique ways to engage with internal systems and facilitate healing. From personal insights to externalizing internal worlds through art or mapping, the multifaceted nature of IFS techniques is emphasized for comprehensive healing.
The Continuing Journey of Unburdening and Reflections on Dependency
The belief that unburdening parts once is sufficient is challenged, underscoring that burdens can resurface for various reasons. New experiences or deep-rooted sensitivities may reignite burdens, necessitating ongoing self-exploration and healing. The complexity of burdens, manifesting in thoughts, beliefs, memories, and emotions, is elucidated, emphasizing the layered nature of internal struggles and the perpetual need for compassionate understanding and support.
Mariel Pastor is an IFS therapist, consultant, and Lead Trainer based in Portland, Oregon who began her IFS journey back in 1998 with Richard Schwartz. She trains across the United States and internationally and is the principal author of the manual used in Level 1 trainings. She is also co-founder of the IFS Telehealth Collective, a multi-state group practice that brings IFS therapy online to clients while supporting the clinicians who serve them. Mariel's Unburdened Internal System mandala illustrates what life can look like when we befriend and unburden our parts, and this material was recently featured as part of the IFS Institute's Continuity Program. This year she will launch online programming for Character Mapping - a psychological toolbox for actors writers, and directors. You can find more about Mariel here at https://www.marielpastor.com
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