The Therapy Edit One Thing with Steph Douglas on focussing on family foundations
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Feb 25, 2022 In this conversation, Steph Douglas, the founder of Don't Buy Her Flowers, shares her insights on balancing family and relationships. She discusses the unique pressures children place on marriages and emphasizes the importance of kindness and patience between partners. Steph reveals how her experiences with motherhood shaped her perspective on parenting's realities versus expectations. She also highlights the need for intentional time together to strengthen connections. Filled with candid reflections, this chat is both relatable and uplifting.
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Prepare For Relationship Changes
- Expect relationships to become harder after having children and don't assume an upward trajectory of constant happiness.
- Prepare to make active decisions to be loving and kind even when you lack emotional capacity.
Personal Shock After Each Birth
- Steph describes feeling intense anger, resentment and loss of capacity after each of her three births.
- She contrasts her muffled, overwhelmed experience with Doug's ability to leave and resume normal life, which deepened her hurt.
Be Kind When Capacity Is Low
- If your partner is exhausted or unreasonable after birth, respond with kindness rather than matching frustration.
- Dig deep to be compassionate because that gentleness helps the exhausted partner recover and reconnect.
