When Florence Williams' 25-year marriage unexpectedly ends, she embarks on a journey to understand the science behind heartbreak. She travels to the frontiers of 'social pain' research, undergoes various experiments such as testing her blood for genetic markers of grief and experiencing electrical shocks while viewing pictures of her ex. Williams also explores the physiological impacts of heartbreak, including its effects on immune cells and overall health. Her journey includes nature getaways, canoeing and rafting trips, and even experimenting with psychedelic drugs. The book is a blend of personal narrative and scientific inquiry, offering insights into loneliness, health, and the complexities of love and heartbreak.
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This is the last episode in our four-part series where we’re counter-programming against the way Valentine’s Day is often celebrated, and examining different kinds of relationships including romantic, friendship, and family.
Today we’re probing a mystery: Why, from an evolutionary standpoint do we take heartbreak and rejection so hard? It can send the body and mind into a vicious spiral. As one genomics researcher has said, “heartbreak is one of the hidden landmines of human existence.“
There are countless pieces of art dedicated to heartbreak. Songs, movies, poems, the list is pretty much endless. But what does science say? Why does this happen to us? How exactly does the body react to a bad break up, from a romantic partnership, or a friendship or even a job? And what can we do to get over it?
These are the questions the writer, Florence Williams decided to tackle after her own 25 year marriage fell apart. And the answers are fascinating.
Florence Williams is a science journalist and author, and a contributing editor at Outside Magazine. Her latest book is called, Heartbreak: A Personal and Scientific Journey. It is just out in paperback, and has been nominated for the PEN/Wilson Award for Literary Science Writing.
In this episode we talk about:
- The passage of time as a way to heal all wounds
- The role purpose plays in recovery
- William’s three part heartbreak recovery toolkit (calming down, connecting to other people and finding purpose)
- The connection between openness and resilience
- How to become more open to a lack of closure
- The good and bad news about heartbreak
- And, rejecting some of the conventional approaches to heartbreak
Full Shownotes: https://www.tenpercent.com/podcast-episode/florence-williams-562
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