Master Elite Human Dynamics: Lessons from Green Beret Nick Lavery
Oct 23, 2023
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Discover what it takes to be a Green Beret with Nick Lavery, an active duty member of the United States Army Special Forces. Learn about the importance of relationship building and rapidly developing trust in cross-cultural and high-stakes environments. Explore the physical and mental components of overcoming challenges, including managing failure. Hear about the power of vulnerability and acceptance when returning to a team. Dive into the importance of building authentic relationships through genuine care, presence, and self-awareness.
Building trust and fostering relationships are crucial to mission success in the Green Berets.
Vulnerability and humility play key roles in establishing trust and achieving team success.
Resilience, relationship building, and mastering the basics are essential for achieving excellence in any field.
Deep dives
Returning to the team
After losing his leg in an insider attack during combat, the speaker refused retirement and fought to rejoin his team. His leadership gave him a chance to prove his abilities through a 12-week assessment phase. His dedication and determination led him back to his team, where he resumed his role as a Green Beret.
Building trust and rapport
The speaker emphasizes the importance of trust and rapport building in his line of work as a Green Beret. He acknowledges the delicate balance between security and fostering relationships, both within his team and with indigenous personnel. He shares how vulnerability and humility played crucial roles in establishing trust and ultimately achieving mission success.
Overcoming failure and embracing vulnerability
The speaker discusses his journey of recovering from his injury and overcoming failure. He shares how his perspective shifted from being self-focused to team-focused, and how being vulnerable with his teammates actually uplifted and motivated them. He highlights the importance of being willing to fail and embracing vulnerability as factors in personal growth and team success.
The why behind going back
The speaker identifies three reasons why he wanted to return to combat as a Green Beret. Firstly, he highlights the competitiveness and love for competition that drives many special operators. Secondly, he expresses his deep passion for his work and the privilege of serving his country. Lastly, he describes a sense of purpose and the desire to be part of something bigger than himself that creates a positive impact on others.
Resilience and the Power of Building Relationships
The podcast episode explores the concept of resilience and its importance in achieving success. The host and guest discuss how resilience is a learned behavior that is built over time through facing and overcoming challenges. They emphasize the value of having a support system, such as family and friends, that can provide constant reinforcement and encouragement. The guest shares his personal experience of growing up as the new kid in school every year, facing bullying and social difficulties, and how this adversity helped him develop resilience. They also discuss the significance of building relationships and establishing trust, both in personal and professional settings. The guest highlights the importance of genuinely caring for others and being present in conversations, which can create a solid foundation for building strong relationships. They emphasize that relationships take time and effort to develop, and that skipping the small talk and focusing on establishing a strong connection is not an effective approach. Overall, the episode underscores the value of resilience and relationship building in achieving success.
The Role of Planning, Basics, and Mental Toughness
The podcast episode delves into the role of planning, basics, and mental toughness in achieving excellence. The guest explains that a plan serves as a known point to return to, allowing individuals to navigate through complex and chaotic situations. They highlight the importance of training on the basics and developing mental toughness to handle the increasing complexity and uncertainty of real-life scenarios. The guest draws parallels between their experiences in combat and other high-pressure environments, such as the business world, emphasizing that the ability to execute the basics with precision in challenging circumstances sets apart the elite from the average. They also discuss the significance of continuous learning, self-awareness, and the ability to adapt and learn from mistakes. The episode concludes with the guest stressing that progress is not always linear and should be viewed as a journey with ups, downs, and unpredictable twists. Overall, the episode emphasizes the value of planning, mastering the basics, and maintaining mental toughness in order to excel in any field.
In today’s episode, we cover what it takes to be a Green Beret with Nick Lavery. Nick is an active duty member of the United States Army Special Forces. On his 2nd combat rotation to Afghanistan 10 years ago, he and his detachment fell victim to an insider attack that led to Nick losing his leg. Refusing a military medical retirement, Nick set his sights on returning to operational status. Nick is considered the 1st special forces operator to return to combat as an above-the-knee amputee. Lastly, he's the author of the book Objective Secure: The Battle-Tested Guide to Goal Achievement.
The Green Berets are the elite special forces of the U.S. Army, but what separates the elite from the rest, why is relationship building critical to the Green Beret’s mission success, and what does it take to rapidly build trust and camaraderie with people across different cultures and language barriers?
What to Listen For
Introduction – 0:00
Why did Nick Lavery enlist in the Army Special Forces?
Most people never enlist this way – 11:30
What separates the Green Berets from other special operations forces in the military?
How do elite special forces learn to rapidly develop trust with people across different cultures and language barriers?
The military secret to building unbreakable teams – 23:26
What do elite special forces do to forge bonds among teams to ensure mission success in life or death situations?
The only Green Beret to return to active duty without a leg – 27:27
How did Nick Lavery lose a leg and return to active duty as the only Green Beret with an above-knee amputation?
The moment he rejoined his band of brothers – 46:15
What was it like for Nick to finally rejoin his team of Green Berets?
The 3 reasons soldiers crave the chaos of war when they’re away from the battlefield
The key to building relationships that most people overlook – 1:01:30
What do most people not do when they’re trying to build new relationships?
How do you crush self-doubt like the elite special forces?
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