227: How to Cool Down Your Nervous System to Heat Up Your Sex Life

Feb 14, 2025

In this discussion, Denita Bremmer, a somatics expert focusing on the mind-body-spirit connection, shares insights into reducing stress to enhance intimacy. She explains how managing your autonomic nervous system can transform relationships. The conversation covers the impact of personal trauma on intimacy and the importance of body awareness in creating a safe emotional space. Denita provides practical grounding techniques and tips for reconnecting with your partner, emphasizing the vital role of presence in intimate moments.

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INSIGHT

Initiation and Desire

Denita Bremmer realized she initiates sex, despite being the lower-desire partner.
This challenged her assumptions about desire and initiation dynamics.

ANECDOTE

From Mindset to Somatics

Denita Bremmer's journey into somatics began with her own healing.
She realized that mindset work alone couldn't resolve her deep-seated trauma.

INSIGHT

Safety First

Safety is paramount for vulnerability and connection in relationships.
Danita emphasizes establishing safety before delving into deeper work.

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The number one libido killer is stress. And experiencing stress from time to time is just a part of life; however, there are skills out there that'll help you manage it better.

One of the black belt sex tips I often teach is a concept called "calm the heck down," which, if you've listened to my podcast for a while, you'll see this theme popping up often. It's the ability to settle down within your own skin and be fully present in the moment. This, along with a few other skills, are essential to learning how to deeply emotionally connect with another person that you absolutely love.

So I'm excited for our guest today: Denita Bremmer. She is an expert in somatics, which is a fancy word for the intersection of the mind, body and spirit. And she teaches how to listen to your body in a way that grounds and connects you so that you can reach new levels of love and intimacy in your relationships.

By the end of this episode, you'll walk away with the following:

Fresh ideas on how to create more safety within yourself and in your relationships
How to better metabolize stress
Work through and heal a history of trauma
How to work with your body instead of against your body as a tool to help you deeply connect with others.

And, of course, listen to the end for Denita is fantastic black belt sex tip!

Coming up . . .

Couples Retreat - An intensive, romantic, and life-changing weekend that will strengthen your marriage and sexual intimacy.

Virtual Lovemaking Retreat - Easily accessible due to its virtual nature, this retreat on February 14th-15th is the perfect Valentines gift to you and your spouse! (Starts today! You can also register and get the recording to use another time.)

Disclaimer: The opinions and values expressed by guests on the Get Your Marriage On! podcast are their own and do not necessarily reflect the opinions and values of the host. Appearance on the podcast does not imply an endorsement of the guest or their products by Get Your Marriage On or its host. While we work hard to bring you quality and valuable content, listeners are encouraged to use their own best judgment in applying the information or products discussed on this podcast.