302: “I’m nearly 40 and feel rushed to find love…help!”
Jun 25, 2025
Feeling rushed to find love as you near 40? Dive into the common anxiety about dating and societal pressures that can make you feel behind. Discover how to manage urgency without panic and the pitfalls of distraction relationships. Learn to embrace the unpredictability of life, communicate your relationship goals clearly, and set healthy boundaries against external expectations. Let go of comparisons and find joy in your dating journey with a newfound focus on intentional connections.
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insights INSIGHT
Fear of Running Out of Time
Fear of not finding a partner as one gets older dominates dating pressure.
This anxiety stems from shrinking dating pools and perceived loss of desirability.
insights INSIGHT
No Straight Path in Love
Life milestones like relationships and marriages are not guaranteed or linear.
Comparing yourself to others disregards that everyone's timeline is unique and changeable.
insights INSIGHT
Danger of Distraction Relationships
Distraction relationships temporarily ease anxiety but often increase it long term.
They cause illusion of progress while wasting precious time from real goals.
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Kitchen Confidential is a memoir and industry commentary that offers a candid, often humorous look at the less glamorous aspects of high-end restaurant kitchens. Bourdain shares his personal experiences, including his struggles with drug addiction and his rise through the culinary ranks. The book is structured as a collection of anecdotes and includes practical advice on the cooking trade, as well as warnings to consumers about restaurant practices. It captures the intense, often chaotic world of professional kitchens and explains why people are drawn to this demanding profession despite its challenges.
Love Life
Matthew Hussey
In 'Love Life,' Matthew Hussey provides a roadmap for overcoming past relationships, fears, and internal anxieties that lead to self-sabotage. The book focuses on adopting new standards, elegant communication, and deepening confidence. It is not just about romantic relationships but also about taking control of relationships with oneself and life itself. Hussey shares his personal experiences and vulnerabilities, making the book a comprehensive guide for anyone seeking to improve their love life and overall well-being.
Do you feel like time is running out to find love? Whether you’re worried about starting a family, comparing yourself to friends who are coupled up, or just feeling urgent pressure to “catch up” in your dating life, this episode is for you.
Matthew, Stephen, and Audrey explore how to handle dating confidently when the stakes feel high, and how to avoid letting fear and anxiety sabotage your decisions. If you’ve ever felt behind—unsure whether to stay hopeful or make a bold change—this episode will give you the tools to find love and ease the pressure others try to put on you.
In this episode we cover:
Why the fear of “running out of time” is so common in dating today.
How to create urgency without falling into panic mode.
The illusion of progress: How “distraction relationships” can quietly steal years of your life.
Real stats on women having children after 35.
How to stop comparing your timeline to everyone else’s.
Reframing societal pressure and internal anxiety.
Dating intentionally vs. dating reactively.
How to bring up having kids in early dating conversations.
The importance of a backup plan—and how it can actually help your love life.
Links:
– Try Matthew AI for free: AskMH.com – Join the Love Life Club with exclusive courses and live events: JoinLoveLife.com – Get your ticket to the Matthew Hussey Retreat: MHretreat.com – Watch the free masterclass: Casual to Committed: GetCommitment.com – Send us your stories or questions: podcast@matthewhussey.com
Love Life With Matthew Hussey 
