The Therapy Edit Confessions - I get mean when I'm overwhelmed
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Nov 1, 2024 In this insightful episode, Anna delves into the complexities of overwhelm and its impact on relationships. She shares an anonymous confession about saying hurtful things during stressful moments. The discussion highlights the importance of self-compassion and the power of words. Anna explains how our nervous systems react to perceived threats and outlines practical strategies for calming down. She emphasizes the need to recognize early signs of overwhelm and repair relationships with compassion. It’s a journey towards healthier responses and support.
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Start With Self-Compassion
- When you explode with unkind words, first offer yourself compassion because your nervous system felt threatened.
- Validate the inner child and then reflect on what you need to prevent repeats.
The Nervous System Treats All Threats Alike
- Your nervous system cannot tell a real physical threat from relational overwhelm, so it triggers fight/flight regardless.
- That explains why small domestic stresses can provoke outsized reactive anger.
Lengthen The Gap Between Trigger And Reaction
- Notice the gap between trigger and reaction and monitor how quickly you flip from calm to angry.
- Increase resources (rest, support, fun) to lengthen that gap and regain choice in your responses.