Bare Marriage Episode 305: All the Problems with Complementarianism in a Nutshell--And How They Try to Make it Sound Pretty
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Nov 20, 2025 The hosts unravel the euphemisms behind complementarianism, revealing its hierarchical implications instead of genuine role differences. They argue that claims of equal value for women but functional subordination contribute to relationship struggles. Highlighting how concepts like 'servant leadership' can enable abuse, they stress that this dynamic often masks authority rather than fostering partnership. The discussion includes critiques of prominent figures and emphasizes that egalitarian practices lead to healthier marriages.
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'Different Roles' Masks Hierarchy
- Complementarianism claims 'different roles' but only restricts women, making it hierarchy not role-differentiation.
- Sheila argues true role-differences would bar some behaviors for men and some for women, which complementarianism does not do.
Equality Claims Collapse Under Sex-Based Subordination
- Claiming women are equal in value but unequal in function is logically inconsistent when subordination is based on sex.
- Rebecca Groothuis' critique shows female subordination follows from innate female sexuality, implying essential inferiority.
'Differences' Often Mean Higher vs Lower
- Complementarian descriptions of gender differences nearly always translate into hierarchy: man leads, woman submits.
- Keith and Sheila point out the language ('lead, protect, provide') is a dog whistle for authority, not neutral difference.
