Hidden Brain It's Not My Fault!
Sep 15, 2025
In this engaging discussion, psychologist Emily Falk from the University of Pennsylvania dives into the science behind defensiveness and our instinct to resist feedback. She shares insights on how to overcome the mental barriers that hinder self-improvement. Joining her is Keira Green, an expert on memory, who tackles listener queries about forgetfulness and the complexities of aging. Together, they explore how emotions shape our memories and provide practical strategies for managing both defensiveness and memory challenges.
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Grandmother's Tough Feedback
- Emily Falk recounts walking outside with her 100-year-old grandmother who said they weren't spending enough time together.
- Her immediate reaction was defensiveness, insisting they were spending time, illustrating how feedback feels like a threat to identity.
Self Equals Good In The Brain
- Falk explains the brain conflates 'me' with 'good', linking self-relevance and value systems.
- That overlap produces optimism and self-protective biases that make criticism feel like a personal threat.
Use Psychological Distance To Reduce Reactivity
- Try psychological distancing techniques like adopting another's perspective or mindfulness before facing temptation.
- Falk's randomized study showed both methods reduced college students' drinking on intervention days.
