

Bonus New Year's Gift: Esther Perel
14 snips Jan 3, 2025
In this discussion, Esther Perel, a renowned psychotherapist and bestselling author, shares her insights on modern relationships. She redefines infidelity, suggesting the roles of victim and perpetrator are more complex than they seem. Perel emphasizes the importance of communication and active maintenance to nurture desire and intimacy, especially in long-term partnerships. She also addresses the challenges of emotional disengagement and introduces ethical non-monogamy as a potential solution. Throughout, she highlights the resilience required to heal and forgive after betrayal.
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The Victim of the Affair
- The victim of an affair isn't always the victim of the marriage.
- Affairs are complex and can stem from various forms of relational betrayals like neglect or rejection.
Why Happy People Cheat
- Affairs aren't always a symptom of a troubled relationship; they can be an existential quest.
- Sometimes, people having affairs seek to reconnect with dormant parts of themselves, not necessarily leave their partner.
Rekindling Desire
- To rekindle desire, try seeing your partner through someone else's desiring eyes.
- Witnessing your partner being desired by another can reignite your own desire.