#293: Gaslit Adoption, Wife Lost Attraction, Hiding Therapy
Aug 17, 2023
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Topics discussed in this podcast include gaslit adoption and navigating family relationships, a wife losing attraction, and hiding therapy from a spouse. Other interesting topics include guilt about buying houses, replacing coping behaviors with fuel-based eating, and Nikki Haley's admiration for Hillary Clinton. The hosts also engage in trivia games and discuss joining a fantasy football league.
Focus on personal goals instead of trying to please your partner.
Set clear goals and track progress to build self-esteem.
View your relationship with food as an addiction and focus on changing coping behaviors.
Balance the need for help with concerns about privacy by considering private therapy and support groups.
Deep dives
Struggling with Motivation and Self-Esteem
The listener shares their struggle with weight and emotional eating, and how their wife's lack of attraction has affected their self-confidence. They are seeking advice on how to let go of their wife's words and build and maintain self-esteem.
Changing Motivation from Fear to Personal Goals
Motivation based on fear is not sustainable in the long term. The listener is encouraged to focus on their personal goals and what they want for themselves, rather than solely trying to please their partner.
Setting Goals and Tracking Progress
Setting clear goals and tracking progress can help build self-esteem. The listener is advised to set specific goals related to exercise and weight loss, and measure their progress to boost confidence.
Addressing Emotional Eating and Building Self-Esteem
The listener is encouraged to view their relationship with food from an addiction perspective, focusing on changing their coping behaviors and finding self-worth in other areas of their life. Building self-esteem can involve recognizing accomplishments and focusing on areas of confidence.
Importance of Seeking Help Privately
The writer discusses their struggle and the need for support in various areas of their life. They express a desire to seek help through private therapy or a local support group. However, they are concerned about their partner finding out about their struggles. They are looking for ways to navigate this situation.
Options for Getting Help
The writer mentions two options to address their struggles: private therapy and a free support group. They highlight the cost and potential noticeability of private therapy, as well as the limited schedule availability for the support group. The writer is seeking suggestions on how to balance the need for help with their concerns about privacy.
Encouraging Openness and Normalizing Seeking Help
While acknowledging the writer's desire for privacy, the summary stresses the importance of open communication with one's partner about seeking help. It suggests considering both private therapy and the support group, and highlights the potential for finding affordable therapy options through various means. The summary aims to normalize seeking help and encourages the writer to explore all available resources.
Consideration of UK Healthcare System
The summary briefly touches on the UK's National Health Service (NHS) and the potential challenges related to wait times and coverage for mental health services. It encourages the writer to explore different options in navigating the healthcare system and finding therapists who offer sliding scale fees or financial assistance.
This week we take on questions about being gaslit by your family about your adoption, when your spouse loses their physical attraction to you, and how to hide therapy from your spouse and still get help.
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