How to Become a Better Listener and Strengthen your Connection with your Kids w/ Lori Gottlieb
Feb 16, 2024
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Lori Gottlieb, NYT best-selling author and host of Dear Therapist, joins to discuss becoming a better listener and strengthening connections with kids. They explore secrecy vs privacy, modeling regulation, building resilience, and the burden of love. They also touch on emotional communication dynamics and societal messaging, as well as building strong relationships and encouraging independent play.
Respecting children's privacy and autonomy fosters trust and encourages open communication.
Creating a safe space and being a good listener builds a strong connection with children.
Deep dives
Importance of Trust and Autonomy in Parenting
A successful parent-child relationship relies on trust and autonomy. Parents should trust their children, respecting their privacy and giving them space to develop their own identities. By avoiding overbearing behaviors and allowing for autonomy, children feel safe to open up and share their thoughts and feelings.
The Power of Listening and Validating Emotions
Being a good listener is crucial in connecting with children. Instead of trying to fix their problems or dismiss their emotions, it is important to create a safe space for them to express themselves. By asking open-ended questions and saying phrases like 'tell me more,' parents show genuine interest and provide emotional support.
Differentiating Secrecy from Privacy
Parents should understand the difference between secrecy and privacy. While secrecy involves hiding or feeling ashamed of one's true self, privacy allows individuals, including children, to have their personal space. Respecting children's need for privacy and recognizing their autonomy can foster a healthy parent-child relationship.
Balancing Practicality and Supporting Dreams
Parents face the challenge of supporting their children's dreams while also offering practical guidance. It is important for parents to strike a balance between encouraging their child's passions and providing them with realistic information. By discussing potential paths and outcomes, parents can help their children make informed decisions while still nurturing their ambitions.
This episode originally aired in April 2023. Tune in to this week’s episode with NYT best-selling author and host of Dear Therapist Lori Gottlieb, where we discuss how to become a better listener and better connect with our kids, how to distinguish between secrecy and privacy, and the difference between connection and codependence.
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