Scratch That: Parenting & ReParenting Off Script

🌪️ How Do We Talk About Our Internalized Ableism?

Nov 4, 2024

Dive into a tender conversation about internalized ableism as two individuals share their personal struggles with diagnosis and identity. They explore the rollercoaster of emotions that arise with new diagnoses, highlighting the pressures of societal expectations for parents. The discussion reveals the intertwining nature of postpartum challenges, mental health, and disability. With candid reflections, they advocate for understanding and a beautiful journey of adjusting to new realities, emphasizing the need for community support and acceptance.

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ANECDOTE

Caitlin's Potential Autism Diagnosis

Caitlin discusses grappling with a potential autism diagnosis and her discomfort with specific language.
She acknowledges using potentially outdated terms while still learning.

ANECDOTE

Rebekah's Language Mishap

Rebekah frequently misuses the term postpartum in the episode.
She mistakenly uses it instead of the correct term, postpartum depression.

INSIGHT

Ableism Affects Everyone

Rebekah believes ableism affects everyone, regardless of disability status.
She emphasizes focusing on personal experiences rather than strict disability classifications.

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The conversation we bring you today is especially tender. We decided to sit down to talk about internalized ableism, because Caitlin is grappling with a potentially new diagnosis that has brought up a lot for them. We hope you'll listen to this one with care — as we process together, we lift the lids on some of the ugliest wounds ableism inflicts. And so much is still fresh.

The two of us experience internalized ableism differently for a host of reasons — Caitlin feels wobbly even claiming the title of disability and would embody a combination of old and new, non-apparent versions of the word, while Rebekah moves through the world in a very visible wheelchair, and has for most of her life — but as we talked, we bumped into a host of thought-provoking overlaps and deviations in our experiences.

Tune in to hear us explore:

🌪️ The wide range of layered emotions that can come up with a new diagnosis.

🦆 The definition of ableism through the metaphor of a duck on water.

🌊 The messy intersections of postpartum depression, internalized ableism, and ADHD/autistic burnout.

👍 The feeling of needing to prove we can be trusted to care for our kids, especially in public.

❗️ The ways pregnancy and postpartum can become disabling experiences, especially in a country that does not support new parents.

💵 How money changes the experience of disability.

♟️ Strategies for navigating mental health struggles as a parent.

🌱 A hope that adjusting to a new diagnosis can be a beautiful process, too.

Mentioned int this episode:

📖 Easy Beauty by Chloe Cooper Jones

🌀 Andy J Pizza shares a lot about his experience of ADHD as a creative — find him on Instagram or his podcast, The Creative Pep Talk Podcast.

🫧 KC Davis creates conversation around neurodivergence & parenting — find her on TikTok, her podcast, Struggle Care, or read her book, How To Keep House While Drowning: A Gentle Approach to Cleaning and Organizing.

⚡️Katherine May's book The Electricity of Every Living Thing

🌿 The Neurodivergence Skills Workbook for Autism and ADHD: Cultivate Self-Compassion, Live Authentically, and Be Your Own Advocate by Jennifer Kemp and Monique Mitchelson

We would love to keep the conversation going in the comments. How do your experiences with internalized ableism overlap/deviate from the experiences we talk about in today's episode? How are you coping? What feels hard? What do you understand now that you didn't at first?

Find us on instagram @sitting_pretty ✨ @caitlinhasfeels