Psychology at Work | Career Success, Leadership, Communication Skills 65. Servant Leader or Total Pushover? How Sara Protected Her Bandwidth & Built Leadership Backbone Without Abandoning Her Values or her Team
Sep 16, 2025
Explore the journey of a team leader who transformed from a passive observer to an assertive contributor in meetings. Discover the fine line between servant leadership and self-sacrifice, and how boundaries can empower both leaders and their teams. Learn how personal experiences, including a military upbringing, shaped her approach and led to better time management and decision-making. Emphasizing vulnerability and collaboration, the discussion highlights the power of community and self-kindness in overcoming insecurity in the workplace.
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Servant Leadership Needs A Backbone
- Calling yourself a servant leader can mask unhealthy people-pleasing and rescue behaviors.
- True servant leadership requires backbone: hard decisions, boundaries, and developing others.
Military Upbringing Shaped Deference
- Sara describes growing up in a military family and literally 'standing at attention' around authority.
- That childhood modeling carried into her workplace deference and anxiety with senior leaders.
Perfectionism Fuels Freezing Under Pressure
- Sara's inner script demanded she always have the perfect answer for leaders, causing chronic anxiety.
- She realized that pattern was unsustainable and sought a 'jolt' to change it.
