Managing Well with Tonya Ladipo Ep 31: Relationship-Building – When Conflict Happens with Elizabeth Byrne (Part 2)
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Sep 15, 2023 
Elizabeth Byrne, a licensed professional counselor, shares her insights on navigating conflict at work. She emphasizes the importance of anticipating conflict and knowing your emotional triggers. Throughout their conversation, she uses the iceberg metaphor to illustrate how past experiences shape reactions. Elizabeth advocates for treating conflicts as opportunities for growth and strengthening workplace relationships. She offers practical advice on effective communication, separating the problem from the person, and the role of managers in fostering emotional safety within their teams.
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Conflict Triggers Past Wounds
- Conflict activates longtime wounds and reactions that often aren't about the present moment.
- Managers must know how they 'drive' through conflict, not rely on being a 'kind person' alone.
Pause And Fact-Check Reactions
- Pause and fact-check your activation: ask whether your fear fits the current person and situation.
- If you cause activation, read the person and respond with brief reassurance to reduce escalation.
Adjust Delivery And Follow Through
- Adjust how you speak to team members based on what you know will trigger them.
- Follow through on commitments quickly to avoid passive-aggression and to build safety.