TED Talks Daily Confessions of a recovering people pleaser | Baron Ryan
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Jan 21, 2025 
Baron Ryan, an internet filmmaker and performer, humorously dissects the paradox of being a people pleaser in his unique one-man stage show. He navigates internal conflicts, sharing witty reflections on the struggles of seeking approval while losing oneself. Ryan explores the deep need for validation, revealing both the irony and the journey toward self-acceptance. Through metaphorical dialogues with his own mind, he emphasizes reclaiming self-respect and embracing authenticity in a world full of expectations.
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Internal Dialogue on People-Pleasing
- Baron Ryan uses a humorous internal dialogue to explore his struggles with people-pleasing.
- He acts out conversations between himself and his inner critic, highlighting the irony of wanting to be liked but being disliked for lacking a spine.
People-Pleasing as Survival Instinct
- People-pleasing stems from a survival instinct, a deep-seated need to be liked to avoid perceived negative consequences.
- This behavior is driven by a fear of disapproval, rooted in childhood experiences where acceptance equated to basic needs being met.
The Coffee Conundrum
- He illustrates this with a comical scenario of two people pleasers trying to decide whether to have coffee.
- Their excessive deference and inability to express their own desires lead to an absurdly circular conversation.