Psychotherapist Adam Phillips - What We Must Give Up to Feel More Alive
Jan 30, 2024
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Renowned psychotherapist Adam Phillips discusses what we must give up to feel more alive. Topics include questioning the assumption of life worth, exploring self-criticism and the power of choosing who to be judged by, expanding language and rethinking loss, and the art of giving up and the pursuit of aliveness.
Questioning the assumption that life is always worth living and acknowledging the importance of allowing individuals to consider whether their lives are truly worth living without feeling imprisoned by societal expectations.
Highlighting the significance of curiosity and redescription in understanding ourselves and others better, emphasizing that curiosity is essential for a fulfilling life and that embracing redescription can transform loss into inspiration, exclusion into self-discovery, and censorship into productive self-expression.
Deep dives
The Importance of Questioning Assumptions About Giving Up
The podcast explores the assumption that giving things up is integral to our lives and challenges what we hope giving up will achieve. It also questions the notion that life is always worth living, emphasizing the importance of acknowledging that some lives may be unbearable. The discussion highlights that when we give up, we believe we can't change, which raises the critical point of why assuming that life is always worth living can be dangerous. The podcast suggests that individuals should have the option to consider whether their lives are truly worth living, without feeling imprisoned by the expectation of staying alive.
The Power of Curiosity and Redescription
The podcast emphasizes the importance of curiosity and redescription in understanding ourselves and others better. It suggests that curiosity is essential for a fulfilling life and that being interested in what we're suffering from can lead to self-discovery and growth. By questioning our habits and routines, we can broaden our vocabulary and expand our world. Redescription is seen as a way to transform loss into inspiration, exclusion into an opportunity for self-discovery, and censorship into a productive form of self-expression. The podcast encourages people to embrace curiosity and engage in conversation as a means of elaborating and redefining their experiences.
Finding the Feeling of Being Alive and Embracing Change
The podcast prompts listeners to reflect on what makes them feel alive and to consider the ways they may be unintentionally deadening themselves. It underscores the importance of examining our wants and desires, questioning cultural assumptions about 'human nature,' and choosing the right kind of censor in our lives. It suggests that embracing change, shaking up habits and routines, and cultivating spontaneity can lead to a more fulfilling and enlivening life. By reframing loss as change and exploring the possibilities beyond certain limitations, individuals can discover their true selves and focus on creating a future that aligns with their authentic desires.
Both a renowned psychotherapist and the 'best living essayist writing in English' (John Gray), Adam Phillips joins us to reflect upon what we must give up in order to feel more alive.
To give up or not to give up? The question can feel inescapable but the answer is never simple. Giving up our supposed vices is one thing; giving up on life itself is quite another. One form of self-sacrifice feels positive, something to admire and aspire to, while the other is profoundly unsettling, if not actively undesirable. There are always, it turns out, both good and bad sacrifices, but it is not always clear beforehand which is which.