Being Well with Forrest Hanson and Dr. Rick Hanson

Beyond Resolutions: Discover What You Want in 2025

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Dec 30, 2024

Why do New Year's resolutions often crash and burn by February? The discussion dives into authentic goal-setting versus societal pressures. Listeners will learn to replace 'shoulds' with intrinsic motivations for true fulfillment. Practical techniques for identifying personal values are shared, along with a role-play on nurturing meaningful relationships. Explore how emotional awareness impacts decision-making and the importance of kindness over rigid expectations in achieving personal growth. This approach promises a transformative New Year!

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INSIGHT

Fulfillment over Shoulds

Focus on fulfillment when setting goals.
Consider what a fulfilling life would look like in hindsight.

ANECDOTE

Rick's Life Tasks

Rick Hanson felt a sense of urgency about completing major life tasks, especially in his 30s and 40s.
He prioritized career establishment and financial stability, driven by a desire to avoid negative consequences.

INSIGHT

Being vs. Deficiency Needs

Approach tasks from a "being" frame, focused on promoting the good, rather than a "deficiency" frame, avoiding the bad.
The same activity can be approached with different mindsets, impacting overall well-being.

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Why do New Year's resolutions usually fail by February? Forrest and Dr. Rick explore why traditional goal-setting falls short and offer a new approach to creating lasting change. They discuss how we can uncover our authentic wants and needs, move away from a punishment mindset, and use our new knowledge to find fulfillment. This episode will teach you how to get more out of any other New Year’s content you listen to.

Rick and Forrest walk through a practical example of brain dumping “shoulds,” shifting the focus from means to ends, and working with internal resistance. They end the episode with a role-play focused on working with someone who wants to find a more meaningful relationship.

Rick’s Yearly Program: Rick’s Foundations of Well-Being 2.0 is a year-long, science-backed journey through developing 12 key inner strengths like mindfulness, motivation, and confidence. It’s currently on sale, and if you like Being Well we think you’ll love it. Follow the link here and use coupon code beingwell20 for an additional 20% off: RickHanson.com/FWB

You can watch this episode on YouTube.

Key Topics:

0:00: Introduction

2:35: Fulfillment as a target, and other healthy ways of orienting to our goals

14:00: Cataloguing our “shoulds”, and being driven by a sense of enthusiasm

23:20: How Forrest has personally connected with his authentic wants

30:15: The “punishment part”

35:50: Practical techniques for identifying our values

41:45: A roleplay focused on how to find a meaningful relationship

51:25: Reviewing the roleplay

55:05: Knowing your why

59:50: Developing your personal psychology, and surrendering to the best within you

1:03:40: Recap

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