Making Polyamory Work

New Information Shock

Nov 15, 2022
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INSIGHT

What New Information Shock Is

  • New information shock is when unexpected news reads as a threat and triggers an upset reaction.
  • The upset is about both the content and the body's threat response, not just the facts.
ANECDOTE

Jordan And Tina Example

  • Jordan tells Tina about a new potential partner and Tina flips out because the news feels destabilizing.
  • Jordan feels they shared reasonably but both end up upset about the timing and delivery.
ADVICE

Agree How To Share Difficult News

  • Ask your partner how they prefer to receive difficult news and make a sharing plan before it happens.
  • Clarify whether they want to process with you in real time or digest asynchronously and then talk.
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