Exploring the downsides of people-pleasing in the workplace, with insights on setting boundaries and avoiding sacrificing work for approval. Discussions on balancing helpfulness and self-care, maintaining genuine relationships in professional services, and navigating boundary-setting in early relationships and workplaces. Also, the importance of clear communication and inter-generational learning in managing workplace dynamics.
People-pleasing can hinder career progression by leading to missed opportunities and high turnover rates.
Setting boundaries and managing time effectively are important to prevent overcommitment and maintain a balance in work relationships.
Deep dives
Identifying People Pleasers and Their Pitfalls
People pleasing involves taking on visible roles at the request of higher-ups, often without direct benefits. The pitfall lies in a false belief that such actions lead to career advancement, which can result in missed promotions and high turnover rates. Despite managers' implicit expectations for such favors, individuals often lack clear guidance on their advancement prospects, leading to confusion.
Balancing People Pleasing with Self-Prioritization
People pleasers often struggle to say no, aiming to gain approval through actions that may not be reciprocated. Setting boundaries and managing time effectively are crucial to prevent overcommitment. Overreliance on people pleasing can undermine one's actual work output, highlighting the importance of maintaining a balance between helping others and focusing on personal tasks.
Navigating People Pleasing in Professional Environments
In client-centric professions like law, aspects of people pleasing are inherent, emphasizing the significance of relationship-building. While setting boundaries is essential, flexibility and clarity in communication are key to managing expectations and work dynamics effectively. Generational differences in boundary-setting highlight the need for clear communication and understanding in creating a productive and respectful workplace environment.
If you’ve ever helped a colleague out just so they’d like you, or overburdened yourself to make your boss’s life easier, you may think of yourself as a good team player. But you might actually be a people-pleaser. Host Isabel Berwick speaks to NYU psychology professor Tessa West, who explains why people-pleasing rarely works in the long term. Later, Isabel talks to Christine Braamskamp, London-based managing partner of law firm Jenner & Block, who explains that a little people-pleasing is sometimes necessary – especially in a newer working relationship.
Presented by Isabel Berwick, produced by Mischa Frankl-Duval, mixed by Jake Fielding. The executive producer is Manuela Saragosa. Cheryl Brumley is the FT’s head of audio