On Attachment
#169: Self-Sabotage: Why We Do It & How to Break Free
Dec 10, 2024
Explore the intricate world of self-sabotage, from procrastination to pushing loved ones away. Discover how these patterns often stem from a misguided desire for safety rooted in attachment styles. Delve into the emotional toll, including shame and frustration, that accompanies these behaviors. Uncover the fears and limiting beliefs that keep us stuck, and learn effective strategies to shift these cycles towards personal growth and supportive habits.
25:46
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Quick takeaways
- Self-sabotage often stems from underlying fears of safety and worthiness, leading to behaviors that contradict one's intentions.
- Different attachment styles significantly influence self-sabotaging behavior in relationships, affecting how individuals seek reassurance or withdraw from intimacy.
Deep dives
Understanding Self-Sabotage
Self-sabotage occurs when individuals struggle to take steps towards achieving their desires, often despite a strong yearning for change. This behavior can be perplexing and can lead to feelings of shame and frustration, especially when it results in behaviors that contradict one's intentions, such as pursuing relationships that are not healthy or neglecting personal goals. Recognizing that self-sabotage often stems from underlying fears of safety and worthiness is crucial to understanding these patterns. By reframing self-sabotage as an emotional response to perceived threats, individuals can begin to address the root causes and work towards healthier behaviors, rather than merely feeling broken.
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