Our Whole Childhood with Patrick Teahan Stop Fawning with Dr. Ingrid Clayton
Sep 9, 2025
Dr. Ingrid Clayton, a clinical psychologist and author, dives deep into the phenomenon of fawning, a complex trauma response often masked as people-pleasing. She discusses how power dynamics can perpetuate this behavior, reflecting on her personal experiences that led her to write her book on the topic. Ingrid touches on the effects of fawning in relationships, the importance of bodily autonomy, and strategies for reclaiming one's identity. The chat offers insights on recognizing fawning in therapy and highlights the path towards self-empowerment and healing.
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Fawning Is A Relational Trauma Response
- Fawning is primarily a relational trauma response that relies on others for safety.
- It thrives inside power hierarchies like families, spiritual communities, and recovery groups.
Hot Tub Tap Dance And Caretaking
- Ingrid described fawning with her stepfather as a 'tap dance' of pleasantness to avoid harm.
- With her absent mother, fawning shifted to caretaking and offering resources to gain attention.
Practice Healthy Conflict Slowly
- Regain access to a healthy fight response gradually and expect awkwardness.
- Treat early assertiveness as learning new muscles rather than evidence of failure.
