Esther Perel, a renowned couples therapist and author, dives into the complexities of intimacy after kids. She discusses how parenting dynamics often overshadow erotic energy in relationships, urging couples to prioritize their connections. The conversation highlights the balance between nurturing children and sustaining adult partnerships, advocating for open communication. Perel also addresses societal pressures on modern parenting and the importance of maintaining romantic intimacy amidst the chaos, offering insights for rekindling desire.
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insights INSIGHT
Partnership and Family
The state of a family system and a child's behavior are often linked to the parents' partnership.
Prioritizing the couple's happiness is crucial for family survival, especially in modern times where divorce is more accepted.
insights INSIGHT
Conflicting Demands of Modern Parenting
Modern parenting involves high expectations for both romantic partnerships and child-rearing.
This creates competing demands on resources such as time, money, attention, and intimacy.
volunteer_activism ADVICE
Prioritizing Your Relationship
Assess the importance of your relationship and demonstrate it through actions, similar to caring for children.
Plan regular dates, express affection, and engage in shared activities beyond parenting.
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In this book, Esther Perel delves into the complex and often misunderstood topic of infidelity. She weaves real-life case stories with psychological and cultural analysis to understand why people cheat, even in happy marriages. Perel argues that affairs can provide a unique window into modern relationships, revealing our expectations, desires, and cultural attitudes about love, lust, and commitment. The book offers practical advice on how couples can heal from infidelity and potentially grow and learn from these tumultuous experiences.
Mating in Captivity
Unlocking Erotic Intelligence
Esther Perel
In this book, Esther Perel explores the paradoxical union of domesticity and sexual desire, arguing that our cultural penchant for equality, togetherness, and absolute candor can be antithetical to erotic desire. Drawing on more than twenty years of experience as a couples therapist, Perel uses case studies and lively discussions to demonstrate how more exciting, playful, and poetic sex is possible in long-term relationships. She emphasizes the importance of maintaining independence, mystery, and the space between self and other to sustain desire.
What happens when two become three, or four, or five? Who is responsible for the needs and wants of a couple when days are filled with playdates, pick-ups, and meal preps? Nights lack the erotic energy that couples need not only to survive but to thrive. This week, Dr. Becky consults with the renowned couples therapist, Esther Perel, to talk about what parents can do to rekindle their desires.
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To listen to Dr. Becky's TED Talk on repair visit https://www.ted.com/talks/becky_kennedy_the_single_most_important_parenting_strategy
For more Esther Perel, head to estherperel.com or listen to her podcast Where Should We Begin. Stories are the building blocks of relationships and Esther Perel designed a game to bring out the storyteller in you. Get yours at https://game.estherperel.com
Good Inside with Dr. Becky 
