On Attachment #214: Parenting Q&A: Fears About Having Kids, Staying Connected After a Baby, Anxious-Avoidant Dynamics & More
Nov 11, 2025
Join a heartfelt discussion on the transition to parenthood as a couple reflects on their journey with their 18-month-old son. Hear about their initial hesitations, the surprises of newfound love, and how they manage household responsibilities without scorekeeping. They share valuable insights on preserving individual time and keeping the relationship strong through support and communication. Plus, listen for essential advice for couples navigating this transformative phase of life!
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Fear Turned To Purpose After Pregnancy
- Joel described long-standing fearful-avoidant hesitation about having children and feeling indecisive and overwhelmed by the permanence of the choice.
- Finding out Stephanie was pregnant lifted that weight and Joel shifted to pride, purpose and commitment.
Partner's Response Shifted Her Joy
- Stephanie feared Joel's response to the positive pregnancy test and initially constrained her own excitement because his stance was unresolved.
- Joel's clear, excited response removed her anxiety and created a turning point in their decision to move forward together.
Parenting Revealed New Capacity For Love
- Joel was surprised by his capacity to love and how parenting reduced his self-absorption and rumination.
- Becoming a father gave him meaning and motivated him to lean into care rather than fear.