Jen Hatmaker, a New York Times bestselling author and co-founder of Legacy Collective, shares her profound journey after losing her 26-year marriage. She reflects on the painful realization that she played many roles except that of a fulfilled wife. Jen candidly discusses the loneliness that can exist even in a marriage, her awakening to vulnerability, and the importance of open communication. Her insights on resilience, identity, and the complexities of relationships offer a heartfelt exploration of personal growth in the face of adversity.
01:07:08
forum Ask episode
web_stories AI Snips
view_agenda Chapters
menu_book Books
auto_awesome Transcript
info_circle Episode notes
question_answer ANECDOTE
Sudden End to 26-Year Marriage
Jen Hatmaker describes her 26-year marriage and its sudden end in 2020.
She emphasizes the shock and lack of a slow burn, highlighting the unexpected nature of the divorce.
insights INSIGHT
Grieving Before Knowing
Amanda asks Jen about recognizing pain before the marriage imploded.
Jen reflects on grieving before consciously acknowledging the loss of her marriage.
question_answer ANECDOTE
Untamed and the Turning Point
Six months before her divorce, Jen read Glennon Doyle's "Untamed."
A sentence resonated, leading Jen to confide in Glennon about her marriage troubles.
Get the Snipd Podcast app to discover more snips from this episode
In 'Love Warrior', Glennon Doyle Melton shares her personal story of overcoming self-destructive behaviors, navigating a troubled marriage, and finding her inner voice. The book details her struggles with bulimia and alcohol addiction, her experiences with her husband's infidelity, and her path to healing and self-discovery. Melton's journey includes her decision to stay in her marriage and work through the issues, as well as her growth as a mother and a writer. The memoir is a candid exploration of love, family, and personal resilience.
Codependent no more
Melody Beattie
In 'Codependent No More,' Melody Beattie provides a compassionate and insightful look into codependency, the concept of losing oneself in the name of helping another. The book helps readers understand that they are powerless to change anyone but themselves and that caring for the self is where healing begins. With instructive life stories, personal reflections, exercises, and self-tests, it offers a clear and achievable path to freedom and a lifetime of healing, hope, and happiness. The book is particularly relevant for those who have lost sight of their own lives while tending to a loved one’s self-destructive behavior[1][3][5].
Fierce, Free, and Full of Fire
Jen Hatmaker
In 'Fierce, Free, and Full of Fire,' Jen Hatmaker encourages women to break free from societal expectations and embrace their authentic selves. The book offers tools to help readers identify their strengths, needs, and desires, leading them to live more genuinely and courageously. Through humor and insight, Hatmaker empowers women to claim their identities and live with unapologetic freedom.
Untamed
Glennon Doyle
In 'Untamed', Glennon Doyle shares her personal journey of breaking free from the societal and cultural expectations that had defined her life. The book is divided into three parts: 'Caged', 'Keys', and 'Free'. Doyle discusses her struggles with eating disorders, addiction, and her initial marriage, as well as her transformative experience of falling in love with Abby Wambach, a retired professional soccer player. The memoir explores themes of self-discovery, empowerment, and the importance of trusting one's own voice and intuition. Doyle reflects on her experiences with gender roles, mental health, and cultural conditioning, encouraging readers to reject the status quo and live more authentically. The book is both an intimate memoir and a galvanizing call to action, urging readers to set boundaries, honor their emotions, and embrace their truest selves[2][4][5].
For the Love
Fighting for Grace in a World of Impossible Standards
Jen Hatmaker
In 'For the Love', Jen Hatmaker offers a humorous and insightful exploration of how Jesus' grace can help navigate life's challenges, particularly those related to people and relationships. The book is a series of essays that encourage readers to let go of perfectionism and judgment, embracing a life of grace and authenticity.
1. Jen describes the shock of losing her 26-year marriage overnight.
2. How, looking back, Jen sees that she knew something was wrong in her relationship well before she “knew” something was wrong–and the moment she reached out to Glennon to share it for the first time.
3. Why Jen’s friends told her she was a “human spotlight” and “cleanup crew” in her marriage–and the pain of realizing she was powerful in every role other than wife.
4. How Jen convinced herself that her marriage was enough when in reality she felt like a pot of water slowly building to a boil.
5. The common hell of being lonely inside of marriage–and why we won’t be fully honest with ourselves, our partners, or our friends about what we are most afraid of.
About Jen:
Jen Hatmaker is the New York Times bestselling author of For the Love and Fierce, Free, and Full of Fire, along with twelve other books. She hosts the award-winning For the Love podcast, is the delighted curator of the Jen Hatmaker Book Club, and leader of a tightly knit online community where she reaches millions of people each week. Jen is a co-founder of Legacy Collective, a giving organization that grants millions of dollars toward sustainable projects around the world. She is a mom to five kids and lives happily just outside Austin, Texas.