534 Grief, Codependency, and Going No Contact - Q&A with Terri
Aug 22, 2023
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Therapist Terri answers listener questions about dealing with grief after multiple losses, setting boundaries with parental figures, addressing sibling abuse, and the impact of sibling abuse. Strategies and personal experiences are shared to provide validation, support, and encouragement for healing.
Processing grief involves allowing oneself to feel and not suppressing emotions, developing a routine, seeking professional help, journaling, and connecting with supportive individuals.
Resenting time spent helping others can be addressed by mourning the time lost, forgiving oneself, taking responsibility, and making different choices moving forward.
Deep dives
Processing Cumulative Grief and Managing Multiple Losses
The podcast discusses the challenges of processing cumulative grief and managing multiple losses. The speaker emphasizes the importance of allowing oneself to feel the emotions associated with grief and not suppressing them. They suggest avoiding numbing behaviors and instead facing and processing the grief head-on. The speaker also encourages developing a daily routine to provide a sense of control and stability, along with seeking professional help from a grief therapist. They mention the benefits of journaling and staying connected with supportive individuals who do not need caretaking during this difficult time.
Handling Resentment and Making Peace with Past Choices
The podcast addresses the issue of resentment towards oneself for investing time and energy in assisting others, at the expense of personal growth and happiness. The speaker acknowledges that many individuals can identify with this experience and emphasizes the importance of mourning the time lost. They explain that it is natural to feel regret and wish for a different path, but it is necessary to forgive oneself, take responsibility, and make different choices moving forward. The speaker encourages practicing self-forgiveness while honoring the journey and personal growth achieved through these experiences.
Setting Boundaries with Parents and Choosing Relationship Dynamics
The podcast addresses the challenge of setting boundaries with parents and choosing the level of involvement in the relationship. The speaker highlights the significance of prioritizing one's own mental and emotional well-being. They suggest evaluating the impact of interactions with parents and considering different levels of contact that feel comfortable, such as reducing frequency or choosing not to have a relationship at all. The speaker emphasizes the right to determine who has the privilege of being in one's life and the importance of self-care in navigating complicated family dynamics.