Passion Struck with John R. Miles Charles Duhigg on Unlock the Secret Language of Connection | EP 680
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Oct 23, 2025 
In this engaging discussion, Pulitzer Prize-winning journalist Charles Duhigg, known for his bestselling works on habits and communication, reveals the art of extraordinary conversations. He explains how to mend connections through specific strategies, like initiating repair conversations with empathy and mutual goals. Duhigg emphasizes the importance of listening to demonstrate mattering while addressing the nuances of conflict and emotional responses. He also shares techniques for reconnecting with estranged loved ones, enhancing relationships through intentional dialogue and daily practices.
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Ask If It’s A Repair Conversation
- Ask a meta-question to clarify whether you should have a repair conversation before diving in.
- This orients both people and prevents confusing emotional vs practical aims.
Open With Acknowledgment And Goals
- Begin repair talks by acknowledging discomfort and apologizing in advance for possible missteps.
- State your goal and ask the other person's goal to lower defenses and align expectations.
Invitation Versus Mandate
- Invitations invite participation while mandates trigger fight-or-flight responses.
- Framing requests as invitations increases the chance the other person will engage productively.
