Depression, relationships, and the myth of the ADHD “superpower” (Max’s story)
Aug 22, 2023
auto_awesome
Max Willey, an expat living in Norway, shares his journey of being diagnosed with ADHD, anxiety, and depression in adulthood. He discusses the challenges of complex tasks, the relief of his diagnosis, and the downsides and positives of ADHD. The podcast explores early signs and symptoms of ADHD, writing a thesis with the condition, maintaining friendships, and living with ADHD by emphasizing self-awareness and coping strategies.
Max was diagnosed with ADHD, anxiety, and depression all at once when seeking treatment for his depression and relationship struggles.
Max's self-awareness and ability to find humor in his ADHD have been crucial in coping with challenges and striving for a balanced and fulfilling life.
Deep dives
Diagnosis of ADHD in Adulthood
Max was diagnosed with ADHD officially at the age of 31, although his elementary school teacher had mentioned his inattentiveness. He struggled with complex instructions and lost interest quickly, but excelled in subjects that interested him. He vividly recalls his first incomplete project, a turkey hand-print in kindergarten, which became a constant reminder of failure. Max also experienced difficulties with reading comprehension, math, and forgetfulness throughout his childhood.
ADHD and Depression
Max's personal decline in his 20s led to a serious episode of depression, characterized by lack of interest, rumination, suicidal ideation, poor sleeping and eating habits, and neglect of personal relationships. Seeking help for his mental health, Max was eventually diagnosed with ADHD, generalized anxiety, and depression. While the diagnoses were challenging, Max felt relieved and hopeful for the opportunity to receive treatment and support.
Perfectionism, Effort, and Coping
Max reflects on the combination of ADHD symptoms, perfectionism, and an all-or-nothing mindset that made maintaining friendships, work, and other aspects of life extremely challenging. Through therapy, he learned that effort doesn't always have to be monumental, and sometimes just showing up and making small efforts counts more. Max's self-awareness and ability to find humor in his ADHD have been crucial in coping with the challenges and striving for a balanced and fulfilling life.
Max Willey, an expat living in Norway, often found himself overwhelmed by complex tasks as a kid. There were too many moving parts, and his brain was always racing too fast. A teacher thought he might have ADHD.
But it wasn’t until adulthood that Max was diagnosed “by accident.” He was feeling depressed and was struggling with some relationships. When he sought treatment, he was diagnosed with ADHD, anxiety, and depression all at once.
Max felt relieved. And he’s come to see ADHD as a “glorious curse.” It has its downsides — but also allows him to feel and do wonderful things.
Understood is a nonprofit organization dedicated to empowering people with learning and thinking differences, like ADHD and dyslexia. If you want to help us continue this work, donate at understood.org/give
Get the Snipd podcast app
Unlock the knowledge in podcasts with the podcast player of the future.
AI-powered podcast player
Listen to all your favourite podcasts with AI-powered features
Discover highlights
Listen to the best highlights from the podcasts you love and dive into the full episode
Save any moment
Hear something you like? Tap your headphones to save it with AI-generated key takeaways
Share & Export
Send highlights to Twitter, WhatsApp or export them to Notion, Readwise & more
AI-powered podcast player
Listen to all your favourite podcasts with AI-powered features
Discover highlights
Listen to the best highlights from the podcasts you love and dive into the full episode