Balancing bragging and humble bragging for a good impression involves genuine excitement and gratitude paired with accomplishments.
Expressing authentic pride in achievements through the journey and effort can leave a positive impact without arrogance.
Counter signaling by intentionally violating norms can signal high status and competence effectively, challenging traditional expectations.
Deep dives
Navigating Impression Management: Bragging versus Humble Bragging
Navigating how to make a good impression involves understanding the balance between bragging and humble bragging. Bragging about achievements can sometimes rub people the wrong way, leading to negative impressions. On the other hand, humble bragging, which masks boasting with complaints or false humility, can also fail to create a positive perception. Finding a middle ground that includes positive emotions such as excitement and genuine gratitude while sharing accomplishments can be a more effective and relatable strategy.
Authentic Pride and Effective Communication Strategies
Communicating accomplishments while maintaining likability and warmth involves strategies like expressing authentic pride rooted in hard work and effort, rather than superiority or arrogance. By highlighting the process or journey behind achievements, individuals can make their stories more compelling and memorable. Encouraging others to speak positively about one's accomplishments, and focusing on genuine excitement and gratitude rather than bragging, can help in leaving a favorable impression without appearing insincere.
Social Feedback and Impression Management Dilemmas
The podcast delves into the complexities of managing impressions, highlighting the challenges individuals face in balancing self-promotion with likability. Strategies like sharing achievements with genuine enthusiasm, having others endorse accomplishments, and revealing the process behind success can aid in making a positive impact without alienating others. Understanding the nuances of bragging and humble bragging, and striving for authentic pride and relatable communication, can contribute to effective impression management.
Showing Genuine Excitement about Achievements
Expressing genuine excitement and pride about one's achievements is essential to engage with an audience effectively. By combining positive emotions like joy, pride, and thrill with the description of the paper or work done, it becomes more relatable and engaging. Providing background context about the effort, team involvement, and life stages during the project adds depth and appreciation for the work. Recognizing and publicly acknowledging co-authors and collaborators not only shows respect but also fosters future collaborations by making it a conversational and engaging experience.
The Power of Counter Signaling
Counter signaling, where individuals intentionally violate expectations or norms, can convey higher status and competence. By behaving in a way that goes against traditional signals of status, like appearing disheveled while being wealthy, individuals can showcase their confidence and indifference to societal norms. This phenomenon, known as the red sneaker effect, demonstrates that intentional and perceived violations of normative codes can signal power, status, and competence effectively. Counter signaling can be a strategic way to convey high status and competence when done purposefully, challenging the notion of conforming to traditional expectations.
What should we do (or not do) to make a good first impression on others? Is "humble-bragging" better or worse than straightforward bragging? Or is completely hiding our successes an even better strategy than humble-bragging or straightforward bragging? When do our attempts to signal something about ourselves actually end up signalling something else that we don't intend? What are some long-term strategies for gaining others' respect?
Övül Sezer is a behavioral scientist, stand-up comedian, and Visiting Assistant Professor at Columbia University, Columbia Business School. She received her A.B. in Applied Mathematics and her Ph.D in Organizational Behavior from Harvard University. Follow her on Twitter at @ovulsezer or learn more about her at ovulsezer.com.
