How to Break the Expectation Trap | Connie Lim aka MILCK

Have you ever asked yourself: “Who am I? What do I stand for?” Many of us do ask these questions and when we do, it can be a catalyst that sets us on an alternative path - even though we know it might disappoint those around us. Yet, all too often, even when our inner knowing is forcing us to pay attention, life can pull us in the direction of expectations versus desire. We hesitate to follow our curiosity for fear we might let down our family and loved ones. As a result, we stay on course towards what “we’re supposed to do”. But it doesn’t always have to be this way. Sometimes choosing the new path is just what we need to honor our voice, culture and family. This is why I’m excited to share this conversation with Connie Lim, whose artist name is MILCK for this Best Of Conversation.

MILCK rose to widespread attention after a video of an a capella performance of her song "Quiet" on the street at the 2017 Women's March exploded into the public’s consciousness going viral and becoming embraced as an anthem for the movement. That moment and the impact and reach of the song led to a major record deal and collaborations as a songwriter that launched the career she’s been working to build for years. But that career almost never happened. MILCK grew up in an enclave of LA, the child of immigrants from China, and was drawn to music from her earliest days. She wrote her first song at 7 years old and studied classical piano and opera. Yet the pressure of intense perfectionism and the expectation she’d eventually leave music behind to follow the family tradition into medicine led her into years of profound emotional struggle. 

Eventually, she hit a point in college where she decided it was time to choose herself over the expectations of others, as well as the burden of perfectionism that had caused so many years of suffering and harm. MILCK left college and went all-in on music, performing as an independent artist for years, slowly building her name, before that fateful day in 2017 that changed everything. She’s now deep into writing, producing and performing her own work, while also writing with and for other artists and focusing on not just sharing her own creative voice, but also gathering community and shining the light on truth and inequity along the way.

You can find MILCK at: Website | Instagram

If you LOVED this episode you’ll also love the conversations we had with Justin Tranter about their journey through challenging times as a kid growing up and then stepping into the world of music - first as a musician, and then as a powerhouse songwriter and collaborator.

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